Back to the Past
by mamaXunicorn
Summary: What happens when the characters of The Phantom of the Opera, get sucked into modern day times? some more like alot Raoul bashing. I changed the rating to M, if you read it, it's for obvious reasons.
1. The light!

Disclaimer: I don't own the phantom of the Opera.

A/n- just a funny little story I thought of.

Erik aqua the Phantom of the Opera was in his lair, pacing back and forth.

Erik: Grr...Stupid fop took Christine away from me. Im going to kill him.

Erik smiled and sat down and started to think of ways to kill that stupid little De chagny. He laughed to himself as he pictured the images in his head. Suddenly a light appeared behind him. Now Erik was too smart to walk toward it, so he just stared at it.

Raoul on the other hand.

Raoul: Ooh A light!

Raoul skip into a light.

Okay now back to Erik

Strange Lady's Voice: Erik…

Erik: who are you? And how do you know my name?

S.L.V: Erik…

Erik: Stop it! I will not tolerate this!

S.L.V: Erik…

Now Erik was getting frustrated and he started to walk toward the light.

Erik: Now who ever you are. You better tell me what you know right now! Before i…

Just then he got sucked into the light.

Erik landed with a thud on hard pavement. "Ouch." He got up and rubbed his backside.

Raoul: Hey! Evil Phantom guy!

Erik: Huh? Oh great…what do you want know, you stupid Fop?

Roaul: It….Hey! I am not a Fop! I resent you calling me that.

Raoul crossed his arms and huphed.

Erik: oh yeah and what are you going to do about it?

Raoul: well I…I might just do…something.

Erik:What?

Raoul: Something…you will see. Yes you will see.

Raoul starts cackling madly and Erik comes over and grabs him by the shirt.

Erik: now, now, now…be calm you stupid Fop or else I…

S.L.V: now now now, Erik calm your self no use beating in Raoul. Even though he is a cheesy little Fop.

Erik: you again? Who are you?

S.L.V: Why I am Jenna. Or you may know me as the Authoress.

Raoul: who?

Jenna: the Authoress.

Raoul: blank face. Who?

Erik: nevermind! I cant take much more of this! You, Fop, shut up and You Authoress continue with our story.

Jenna: right!

Erik and Raoul walked along the road not knowing where to go.

Erik: excuse me. I do know where I am going. It's the vicomte that does not!

Oh really then where are you going?

Erik: uhh….

Raoul: ha! Your speechless! Ha ha! Ha ha!

Erik: Be quiet! Slaps Raoul

Raoul: Owie! Jenna! He hit me!

Jenna: well maybe you deserved it!

Erik smiled.

Erik: oh yes, he did. Believe me he did

Jenna: of course I believe you Erik, My love.

Erik: …..

Raoul: I thought you loved Christine.

Erik: I do!

Jenna: Pouts

Erik: muttering. Stupid Phangirl…Oh go on! Oh great authoress.

Jenna: huphs. You will be mine! Someday!

Raoul: what is an Authoress?

A/n: Yeah that kind of wasn't as funny as I thought it would be. But anyway Review tell me if you like it! Or Love it! Or hate it! But don't go that hard if you hate it.


	2. Christine and MG

Wandering Child24: Thank you, even though it's not really modern day. It's more like a humor story where they all get sucked into a Portal that transports them into modern day. But if that's what you meant then..

angel of mystery: Yes of course im going to have some FOP haters show up. no doubt about it.

POTOlvr24: You like it? You just like it? How rude! LOL J/k. Your wish is my command, 'poof' oh look im updating!

Chap.2

Our crew, well Erik, Raoul, and Jenna, have been traveling all day and some people. CoughcoughRaoulcoughcough were getting tired.

Raoul: My feet hurt.

Erik: Deal with it.

Raoul: No!

Erik: yes!

Raoul: You can't make me!

Erik (pulling a lasso, out of now where) oh really?

Raoul: meep.

Suddenly a light appeared.

Raoul: a Light!

Suddenly someone flew out of it, crashing into a bunch or trash cans.

Jenna: about time you got here.

The person sat up and, they realized it was Christine!

Raoul: Christine!

Christine: Raoul! There you are. I've been worried about you, what happened.

Raoul: well I saw this light, it was a pretty light, and it was calling my name…

Erik: Oh brother.

Christine: turns gaze to Erik. What are you doing here?

Erik: Well Christine…(turns to jenna) We are in America aren't we? (jenna nods.) good. (turns back to Christine) it's a free country I can go where ever I want!( he crossed his arms) oh no! I just sounded like…like…(points to Raoul) him! (starts to run up and down the street) I AM NOT A FOP! I AM NOT A FOP!

Jenna: (grabs him by the shirt tail) Erik! This is the year 2005! People do not know what a Fop is! And a man in a mask, dressed in old fashion clothes, running up and down the streets like a mad man, will not help their confusion!

Erik: (stares) wow. This girl's got a temper on her!

Jenna: ughh! (lets go of Erik) come we must…

Erik: hey that is my line!

Jenna: I was not going to say that! I was going to say, come we must move on.

Erik: suuuure.

Raoul: (who is clueless) what is so bad about being me?

Christine: nothing you are…

Erik: a stupid Fop

Christine: no…I was going to say you…

Erik: Don't know anything

Christine: No! I was going to say that you are perfect.

Erik: Him? Perfect. I mean I know I have a distorted face, but at least I have brains! You even said I was a genius.

Christine: when?

Erik: after Hannibal, you sang, somehow I know he's always with me, he the unseen genius.

Christine: well that was before I knew you.

Jenna: alright let's get a move on!

Raoul: (sticks his tongue out at Erik)

Erik: (shows Raoul his lasso)

Raoul: (quietly) meep

So again they started on their way.

Jenna: alright stop here. I must go get someone.

They stopped in front of a big white house.

Jenna: (goes up to the door and knocks)

A mysterious girl answers the door.

M.G.- oh, hi jenna. Whats up.

Jenna: nothing much Melissa(1). i…

Raoul: Jenna! Erik is threatening to kill me with his lasso again!

Erik: no I am not! (to Raoul) baby

Raoul: he called me a baby!

Erik/Jenna: Shut up!

M.G. or Melissa: Uhh…what's going on? Who are those people

Jenna: you don't recognize them?

Melissa: (shakes head)

Jenna: Erik?

Erik. Huh?

Jenna: do you mind?

Erik: do I mind what?

Jenna: (sighs) get out here!

Erik: (comes out from behind the car)

Melissa: (gasps) Oh My God! (she screams)

Erik: not another Phangirl.

Melissa: It's him the Phantom of the Opera! It's…it's…him! How is he in front of my house!

After a few more minutes of Melissa screaming, Erik covering his ears, Raoul laughing at Erik's torture, and Christine well just watching it all. Melissa finally calmed down

Melissa: Hi phantom (sees Raoul) Oh hi Fop

Raoul: what? No! not another one! WHY MUST EVERYONE HATE ME!

Erik/Jenna/Melissa: Because you're a stupid Fop!

Raoul: am not!

Jenna/Melissa: are too!

Raoul: am…(stares blankly)

Erik:what's wrong wit him?

Christine: Mind blanks he gets them a lot.

Raoul:…not!

Everyone starts cracking up, except Christine and Raoul.

Raoul: what's so funny?

Christine: he's not aware that he gets them.

Erik: Raoul…buddy…look…I don't know how to put this…but you need help.

Raoul: why?

Erik: Oh god.

Erik turns and walks away

Erik: someone please explain it to him!

Jenna: you're stupid man.

Raoul: How many times have you told me that. I know!

Jenna/Erik/Melissa: (shrugs) ok.

Jenna: so can we go now or what?

Erik/Christine/Melissa/Christine (nods)

Jenna: good. Onward!

And again they set out.

A/n-

(1)- Melissa is Real, yes actually. She is my best friend and also a member of this wonderful sight. You may know her as POTOlve24.


	3. On Top Of Spagetti!

Raven: seriously, it made you crack up. I wrote this and then read it over, I didn't think it was that funny, but you proved my thinking wrong. Thank you!

Wandering child24: thanks! Thanks a whole lot! And I am not being sarcastic! LOL….Ill update later chapters as fast as I can too. I have a lot of other stories to work on too, so….

POTOLvr24: Yea you were! And you'll be in all the other chaps, too!

Chap. 3

Once again they are walking down the streets, but this time, once again Raoul is annoying the rest of the group.

Raoul: WEREEEEEEEEEEE…..off to see the wizard the wonderful of oz! we hear the he is a wiz of a wiz if ever a wiz there was! If ever oh ever a wiz there was the wizard of oz is one because, because, because, because, because, becauseeeee!...

Erik: Fop!

Raoul: what?

Erik: oh my God, he actually answered to Fop!

Raoul: Oh crap

Jenna: where did you hear that song? That movie wasn't even made until 1939! ( A/n: 4 more years and "the wizard of oz" will be 70 yrs old!)

Melissa: yeah…

Raoul: (shrugs) I don't know. It just popped in my head, And it is cool! Isn't it! (continues to sing) Because of the wonderful things he does… we're off to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of Ooooozz!

Erik: (slaps his forehead) will someone please shut him up!

No one moves.

Erik: fine! I will do it myself!

Raoul: (breaking into another song) Long ago. It seems so long ago. How young an innocent we were, she may not remember me! But I remember her…

Erik/Christine: where the hell is that from.

Melissa: well why you (pointing to Christine) were singing "think of me" and You(pointing to Erik) were in your lair listening to her. He was in the main hallway singing that.

Erik: how do you know all this? HOW DOES SHE KNOW ALL THIS?

Jenna: It's a movie in our time.

Erik: they made a movie out of lives?

Raoul: I'm in a movie?

Jenna/Melissa: nods

Raoul: YaY! I am a movie star! (breaks into another song) Here he comes! Mister….movie star!

Erik: You are one strange little man.

Jenna: well actually, Erik and Christine were. You were just the dumb fop who in a strange and demeaned way, made the story a bit more interesting.

Melissa: yeah, if it wasn't for the Fop, Erik would have gotten Christine and she would have accepted and they would have lived happily ever after and all that crap.

Erik: damn Fop. You ruin everything…

Raoul (not hearing Erik, and continued singing yet another song) On top of Spagetti! All covered with cheese! Lost my poor meatball when somebody sneezed! It rolled off the table and on to the floor!

Erik: ( to Christine) how do you deal with…(looks at Raoul) with…_that!_

Raoul: It rolled in the garden! And under a bush! And then my poor meatball was nothing but mush.

Just then the mysterious light appeared.

They all stopped what they were doing(except for Raoul) and turned and looked at the light.

This time two men came flying out, one landing on top of another.

Man #1: I say where are we?

Man#2: Andre, I do not know.

Erik: Ha, ha! I knew it!

Man#1: knew what?

Erik: My managers are gay! My managers are gay! Ha ha!

Man#2: we most certainly are not.

Erik: look at your positions!

Man#1 was on top of man # 2, sitting right near his waist.

Man#2: GET OFF!

Man#1: (gets off man#2) Sorry.

Jenna/ Melissa: (looks at each other than giggles)

Man#2: what are laughing about?

Man#1: and who the hell are you?

Jenna: well I am Jenna…the Authoress.

Raoul(paused his singing) Who?

Jenna( ignores him)

Melissa: And im Melissa her friend.

Man#1: the authoress? What in God's name is an Authoress.

Jenna: not another one.

Man#2: it's a girl author you dimwhit! (slaps man#1 updside the head)

_Okay I am getting really tired of putting man#1 and Man#2! _

Raoul: (looks around franticly, trying to find out where the voice came from…He hides behind Christine...) Christine! We're being haunted by a Ghost!

Erik: (ignoring the Fop.) So, monsieur Firmin, Monsieur Andre…

_Thank you! You are my savior_

Erik: riiight…anyway…apparently we are in the year 2005. And we got here the same way you did. By the light vortex.

Raoul: (who is back to singing) The mush was as tasty! As tasty can be! And then the next summer it grew into a tree. The tree was all covered, all covered with moss! And on it grew meat balls! All covered with sauce!

Andre(joining in) So if you eat spaghetti! All covered with cheese. Hold on to your meat ball and don't ever sneeze!

Both: Achoo!

Firmin/Erik/chrisitne/Melissa/Jenna: (Stare)

Firmin: Andre! What is God's name…

Andre: I like that song…

Erik: im surrounded by idiots.

Christine/Jenna/ Melissa: Hey!

Erik: Sorry. i meant the three gentleman….the two gentleman over there.

Raoul: Hey! If im not a Gentleman, what am i?

Erik: who knows!

Raoul: (sticks out tongue at Erik)

Erik: You are so…Stupid…

Christine: now boys, settle down. No point in fighting for either way you choose you cannot win.

Erik: That sounds awfully familiar to me…

Raoul: well that's because you said it!

Erik: Oh yeah…(realizing what he's just done) Oh no! I just agreed with the Fop! The Fop was right! Nooooo! Im supposed to be the genius!

_Anyway….some where else on another galaxy… Two alien are watching this silly performance on a screen._

Alien#1: Ohhh! That one! I want that one!

Alien#2: but he's a Fop…(seems confused) what's a Fop?

Alien#1: (shrugs) I don't know….but it must be good! Because everyone is calling him that!

Alien#2: (nods) let's go!

_Their spaceships continues to move…_

BUM, BUM, BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM!

What is going to happen? Hmm…who know! Please Review

Oh and Man#1 was andre and Man#2 was Firming. Just to let you know.


	4. Mysterious Horses and The Bowl

Disclaimer: I do not own the Phantom of the Opera.

Chap.4

Andre: Sooooo… does anyone have an idea of how we are going to get back.

Firmin: Yes how are we going to get back? This time is certainly strange.

Jenna: yeah well we think your time is strange.

Melissa: yeah…and what is with all the horses?

Christine: Well that's how we travel.

Melissa: yeah, I know but seriously horses just appear out of nowhere, in your time.

Firmin/Andre/Christine/Erik: They do not. (A/n: notice how I did NOT include Raoul in there.)

Jenna: yeah they do…I mean really. When Erik and Christine are singing "Phantom of The Opera." Erik leads her down hallways and leads her to a horse! Seriously! How can you keep a horse down there! And that's the only time you see that horse again!

Melissa: yeah it's just like…Erik snaps his fingers. Poof! Horse! And then go away I do not need you anymore, snap poof. (A/n and Melissa is saying this not snapping her fingers and making something go poof) Horse is gone.

Some Random Phangirls: oh yeah, yeah that's true, where does the horse go?

Erik: (glares)

Raoul: umm…

Erik: You know that's really none of your business.

Jenna: Erik…

Erik: Or maybe it's my dark horse of the night. Ooooooo..

Raoul: Ummm….

Erik: maybe he lives in a dark corner of my lair and I feed him. Remember I do get 20,000 francs a month. Which has not been paid! (glances at Firmin and Andre)

Firmin and Andre: (clueless and still have not realized that the Phantom is standing right in front of them)

Raoul: Hello! I am saying Ummm over here!

Everybody turns to look at Raoul.

Raoul: there's a big bowl in the sky. (points to sky)

Everybody looks up.

Jenna/Melissa: it's a UFO.

Erik/Firmin/Andre/Raoul: A what?

Jenna: A UFO.

Erik: We heard you the first time but what is a UFO?

Melissa: aliens

Erik/Andre/Firmin/Raoul: Oooohhh…

Andre: What are aliens?

Firmin/Erik/Raoul:Yeah..

Melissa: creatures from a different planet.

Aliens: Fop…

Raoul: What?

Aliens: come…

Raoul: okay.

Raoul starts to walk toward it.

Christine: No! Raoul stop!

Raoul stops.

Aliens: No…come!

Christine: No Raoul don't leave me!

Raoul: Bowl or Christine, bowl or Christine, bowl or Christine….(whines) oooo this is so confusing!

Erik: (whispering to Raoul) pssst… Go to the Bowl.

Raoul: ( who looks like he thinking, Key word their people LOOKS) okay!

Raoul walks toward UFO again.

Erik: (smiles)

Christine: (panic)

Jenna/Melissa/Andre/Firmin: watching in amusement.

Aliens: come to us Fop! Come! COME!

Raoul: yes I will come!

A bright light suddenly comes out from the bottom of the UFO.

Raoul: Light!

Aliens: toward the light. Come to us!

Raoul: must go toward the light….must go to them..

Raoul disappears into the light and then the light disappears and the UFO takes off.

Chrisitne: NoOO!

Erik: Yes!

Suddenly the six flags music comes on, and to everybody's surprise Erik is dancing to it. And very much like the Six flags dude. (A/n: you know the old guy with the weird glasses and surprisingly a lot of energy.)

Erik: the Fop is gone! The Fop is gone! I have been waiting for this for a long time!

Christine: why?

Erik: well…1) he stole you away from me, 2) anyone who is stupid enough to walk toward a UFO as you call it deserves to be taken away and 3) I just don't like him…I mean seriously he is so self centered and he's just a Fop.

Christine: (thinking) I guess that's true.

Erik: what?

Christine: you're right… Raoul is a Fop…and I don't know how I deal with him. You know what know that he's gone I can admit my true feelings.

Erik: really?

Christine: I love you my Angel.

Firmin: well I must say this is shocking.

Andre: indeed.

Erik: (shocked) So…if he comes back…you're gonna dump him?

Christine: (nods)

Erik: Yay! (goes and kisses Christine)

Jenna: NOOOOOOO!

Erik: (after done kissing Christine…goes and hugs Jenna)

Jenna: ummm…

Erik: right that was ackward.

Jenna: yeah…(but in her head) YAY! (A/n: that Yay! Was not said aloud by her…)

Melissa: (Stares in shock) Did the Phantom just hug you?

Andre: Phantom! Where?

Jenna/Melissa/Erik/Christine: (stares at Andre weirdly)

Erik: right here you dimwhit! I have been with you the whole entire time!

Firmin: oh my God! You are the Phantom of the Opera!

Erik: wow! Good work Columbus!

Jenna: anyway back to Melissa's question. Yes I think he did just hug me…

Melissa: Oh my God!

Jenna: I know!

Erik: Uggh… Phangirls.

Andre: I am sorry that your salary was not paid! It's all Firmin's fault!

Firmin: I beg your pardon!

Andre: yeah! If it was up to me! I would have sent you the money right there on the dot! But no he had to go and be "non believey!" (A/n Yes! I just made up that word.)

Firmin: if I recall! You didn't believe in him either! If I recall you sang. " these are both signed O.G. who the hell is he? Opera Ghost! There's nothing sort of shocking, he's abusing our position in addition he wants money! What a funny apparition…and so on!

Andre: you sang that too!

Erik: (who didn't care anymore about the salary, just watched the two argue in amusement.)

Jenna: he's not going to hurt you!

Erik: (glares at Jenna for ruining his amusement)

Andre/Firmin: really?

Erik: yeah…im not gonna harm you.

Andre/Firmin: good.

PTO

Ok that's where im gonna leave you…ive been working on it all day. And quite frankly im tired.. soo.. Review and ill update sooner! Hopefully.

I would like to thank: **blue, musicofthenight5, Erik for president, catnip, mrs. Molfoy, and last but certainly not least(for she is part of my story) POTOlvr24…**for my lovely reviews!


	5. Bravely Bold Sir Erik

Chap. 5

We last left where, Raoul got upducted by aliens, Erik danced to the six flags dance, Christine admitted her true feelings for erik, Erik hugged Jenna (much to Jenna's delight), Firmin and Andre realized that the Phantom was standing right there, and Jenna disturbed Erik's amusement.

Erik: (to jenna) you know I was quite amused by Andre and Firmin argueing, then you had to go and ruin it.

Jenna: well I was quite annoyed. I already knew what happened, I didn't need to hear them argue about it.( A/n and actually im listening to the soundtrack as I am typing this. And more weird it is the song "Notes/Prima Donna" and it's the part. "theses are both signed O.G." weird huh?)

Erik: well I wanted to.

Jenna: Oh sure lets do everything that you want to do.

Erik: yes lets. You've already seen the movie so you know what would happen if you didn't do what I liked.

Jenna: oh yes, you will curse the day you did not do all the phantom asked of you.

Erik: oh that had no emotion. It's more like this, (sings like he does in the movie) You will curse the day you did not do, all that the phantom asked of youuu.

Jenna: hey that was pretty good, considering your heart is not broken now.

Melissa: what are you two chatting about back there.

Erik/Jenna: nothing.

Melissa: you were talking about something! TELL ME! PLEASE!

Erik:it's really none of your business.

Christine: Erik?

Erik: damn.

Christine: what were you talking about with her.

Erik: nothing to be worried about, Christine. I love you and only you.

Jenna: Muttering…lucky…muttering

Erik: what was that?

Jenna: nothing.

Suddenly something crashed down through the sky a few miles away.

Andre: what was that?

Firmin: I don't know.

Jenna: neither do i.

Melissa: nope.

Christine: I have no idea.

Erik: it looked like a meteor or something.

Andre/Firmin/Jenna/Melissa/Christine: (looks at Erik)

Erik: like I said im a genius.

Jenna: alright mister smarty pants…lead the way…

Erik: are you crazy. It could be dangerous or something.

Melissa: you scared?

Erik: What?

Melissa: I said are you scared?

Erik: I most certainly am not! Alright it looked like it went that way.

Erik turned left and started to walk. They all followed him.

Jenna: (singing) Bravely bold Sir Erik. Rode forth from Paris, France. He was not afraid to die oh brave sir Erik. He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways. Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Erik.

Melissa: (also singing, but taking over Jenna) he was not in the least bit scared to be smashed into a pulp, or to have his eyes gouged out and his elbows broken, to have his knee caps split and his body burned away, and his limbs all hacked and mangled. Brave Sir Erik.

Melissa/Jenna: (still singing) His head smashed in and his heart cut out, and his liver removed and his bowels unplugged and his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off and his pen….

Erik: OKAY! That's enough…that's enough.

Firmin: yes really we did not need to know that.

Andre: yes…

Melissa/ Jenna: (laughs)

Erik: I don't see what is so funny.

Melissa: it was just a song.

Erik: yes but it was a song about me!

Jenna: well so is, Angel of Music, The Phantom of the Opera, I remember/stranger than you dreamt it, magical lasso, notes, why have you brought me here/ Raoul I've seen him/ wandering child, well that's partially about Christine too but anyway/ we have all been blind/ down once more, which also is partially about Christine and Raoul.

Erik: why must you always do that?

Jenna: do what?

Erik: spoil my moment! First you ruin my amusement! And now this! What the hell is your Problem!

Jenna: well…it's fun!

Erik: you people need to learn how to entertain your selves more easily. You're always s gosh darn bored! In my time..

Melissa: In your time you thinks it's fun to kill people, scare innocent girls, attack Fops wait no that's fun, and knock down chandeliers!

Jenna: no that's just him.

Erik: Grrrr..

Andre: that was him who killed Buquet!

Firmin: oh my God Andre, where have you been!

Andre: well you said it was simply an accident!

Firmin: I didn't want the audience to be frightened, more than they were!

Andre: well you could have told me!

Firmin: I thought you knew.

Jenna: (opening her mouth to say something)

Erik: don't…you…dare.

Jenna: (closed her mouth)

Erik: (smiles and watches back in amusement)

A/n: that's where Im leavin ya people. Please review! Oh and I do not own the Monty Python and the Holy grail or the phantom of the Opera


	6. Junk BuisnessScrap metal!

POTOlvr24: you're my only reviewer… :-(. YOU LAZY PEOPLE! Sorry im good now. Im super glad that you love it! I've never written a humor story like this before so this is my first…and it's pretty good according to you.

Chap.6

_Last time_: _Andre: that was him who killed Buquet!_

_Firmin: oh my God Andre, where have you been!_

_Andre: well you said it was simply an accident!_

_Firmin: I didn't want the audience to be frightened, more than they were!_

_Andre: well you could have told me!_

_Firmin: I thought you knew._

_Jenna: (opening her mouth to say something)_

_Erik: don't…you…dare._

_Jenna: (closed her mouth)_

_Erik: (smiles and watches back in amusement)_

_Now for the story: _

1 hour later.

Andre and Firmin were still argueing.

Firmin: for goodness sakes Andre, I think you need to get your head checked!

Andre: what? It's not my fault!

Firmin: yeah you're right…it's your parents fault. They never taught you the proper education.

Andre: (gasps) they did so! I went to school just everyother boy!

Firmin: of course…but you're parents never taught you common sense!

Jenna: (who is sitting on the ground, agitated.) Alright! That's enough! Firmin, don't make fun of your partner. Although he is a little bit slow and he has a funny hair cut…

Andre: I do not!

Melissa: yeah you do.

Andre: I do not!

Firmin: he has since we were in the junk business.

Andre: scrap metal! (a/n yeah I had to bring in a joke from the movie…I just had to)

(you people might be asking where is Erik. Well he is sitting between Jenna and Christine, engrossed in the scene before him)

Jenna: like I was saying…even though he is a bit slow, a bit eccentric, and he has a funny hair cut…he is still nice.

Andre: thank you. At least someone appreciates me.

Jenna: don't push it.

Firmin: yes actually it's a very funny how he got that hair.

Erik: oooo…I need to hear this.

Melissa/Jenna: me too!

Firmin: alright…well one day when we were working outdoors. You see we usually work indoors, anyway…so we were working outside. Suddenly it began to storm, we weren't to worried. It looked faraway, so we continued to work. Then it began to pour. Andre wanted to go inside but I said no it's just a little rain. So Andre went back to work and then it lightinged. Now I was scared, but then Andre used my speech against me.

Andre: oh yes.

Firmin: he told me, there's nothing to worry about it's just a little lightning. Then he placed his hand on a big pile of metal as soon as lightning lit the sky…so you can only imagine what happened. Ever since that day Andre couldn't comb down his hair or anything.

Andre: and once again it is your fault.

Firmin: excuse me?

Andre: yes…if you just let me go in when it was raining, I wouldn't have got electrocuted.

Erik: (bursting out in laughter) ha! You got electrocuted! Ha! No wonder your mind is so screwy!

Andre: I beg your…

Jenna: good idea…you shouldn't talk back to the Phantom.

Andre: No I didn't stop because of that! Although that is a good idea…I stopped because look! It's that meteor.

Everyone turned to look at what Andre was looking at. And sure enough it was a meteor.

Melissa: wow…Erik was right.

Erik: well of course…Hey! What is that supposed to mean?

Melissa: I don't know.

Ackward silence..

Erik: 'say something…anything to break the silence.' Banana Hammock. (1)

Everyone: (turns to look at Erik)

Erik: sorry the silence was killing me.

Jenna: that was on Scrubs!

Erik: on who?

Jenna: scrubs it's T.V. show.

Andre: A what show?

Jenna: oh that's right they didn't have television back then…

Erik: television…what the duce is television.

Jenna: well its like…wait they didn't have radio either…man you're time is BORING!

Melissa: it's like you see a play or Opera inside of a screen.

Andre: how big is the screen?

Melissa: depends. It could be only about 10 inches or 40 inches…

Firmin: how do people fit in there?

Jenna: it would take an hour to explain it to theses people.

Erik: They use Cameras…video cameras. They film real live people, actors and project them onto screens, and transform them into videos… which is played in a VCR.

Jenna/Melissa: (Stare shocked at Erik)

Jenna: How the HELL did you know that?

Erik: I do not know…It just came to me…

Jenna: the man's a genius. (goes over to hug Erik…but gets a glare from Christine. And pauses.)

Christine: (whispers) good.

Jenna: (goes and hugs Erik anyway.)

Erik: Thank you for the compliment but if you wouldn't mind getting off of me. (trys to pry Jenna off of him…its not working) Get off me! Get off I say! OFF! SOMEBODY HELP ME!

Christine goes and grabs Jenna's legs and pulls her. Christine is not succedidng.

Christine: help!

Everyone: (Firmin, Andre and Melissa) (helps Christine)

After a few minutes they finally get Jenna off, while making them all flying back.

Erik: right. Shall we continue.

P.T.O

That's where I am leaving you…Review! You lazy people!

(1) like I said…I did get that line from Scrubs…which I do not own!


	7. Sugar enduced Phan girl and carlotta

Thank you all my kind Reviewers! Now my Talking Crazy Squirrel of doom will thank you too!

Talking, Crazy squirrel: I am not a doom Squirrel!

Me: sure you are…you're my talking crazy squirrel of doom. (Hugs squirrel)

Talking, Crazy Squirrel: No! Get off of me you mad woman!

Me: (let's go of squirrel)

Talking, Crazy Squirrel: (brushes himself off) anyway…thank you for reviewing! And continue to review…and whatever you do not make my master sugar high…for that is the only time I am around and the only time I wish not to be around.

Here it is my fanz! Chap.7

Where did we last leave off…oh yes...Erik just got attacked with a hug from Jenna.

Christine: (to Erik) That Jenna is a crazy young woman isn't she...

Erik: (looks back at Jenna who out of nowhere became sugar high and is now acting like a madwoman) I think young woman is not the right word to describe her Christine…

Andre: (who is clutching onto Firmin) Firmin…She is scaring me…she keeps looking at me with a weird look in her eyes. (He glances around…Melissa is also staring at him weirdly) And that other girl too!

Firmin: well you think it might have something to do with you clutching onto me for dear life…

(Andre does not get the picture and remains where he is)

Firmin: FOR HEAVEN"S SAKE ANDRE GET THE HELL Off OF ME!

This gets everyone's attention…Jenna stops her Raoul like behavior, Melissa well she was staring at them to begin with and Erik and Christine stop talking to stare at them.

Erik: this just proves my point.

Andre: (immediately gets off.)

Melissa/Jenna :( Giggle)

Andre: I am s...s...sorry I didn't mean too.

Jenna: why must you always stutter?

Andre: Huh?

Jenna: stutter you always stutter! Right after Erik made his first appearance you said "in the mean time we would like to give you the b…b…ballet of tonight's Opera."

Erik: the b…b…ballet?

Jenna: the b…b…ballet.

Andre: why must you always torment me?

Erik/Jenna/Melissa: because it's fun.

Andre: why?

Melissa: because you're weird. Seriously when you and Firmin are singing notes…you come in running very strangely, singing "damnable will they All walk out, this damnable." And then the way you said, "But we have no cast." And then when Firmin says "Andre have you seen the ques?" you look around as if you are looking for the Ques!

Firmin: Really? I thought you saw something…I didn't think you were looking for the Ques!

Andre: Well I um…

Andre got interrupted by the light again.

Jenna: LIGHT!

Melissa: yup she's sugar high.

Someone very overdressed came flying out they landed on the ground with a thud.

Andre/Firmin: Carlotta!

Carlotta: Where am I? What am I doing here?

Erik: Just what I need, I have a sugared Phan girl, two gay idiotic managers and now a Overdressed Italian lady who intentially wishes to disobey my orders! (he knows he is forgetting something and looks around) oh yes! And that weird girl, whose name I do not know.

Melissa: Mel..

Erik :nor do I care to find out.

Melissa: (Humphs)

Christine: Erik…that's mean.

Erik: okay, okay fine.. whats your name

Melissa: Melissa.

Erik: okay very good marissa.

Melissa: Melissa

Erik: I understand Alyssa. (and Erik is not being stupid he's just not caring)

Melissa: MELISSA! My name is MELISSA!

Erik: ok ok don't have cow!

Carlotta: will someone please 'elp me up! this ground es Disgusting!

Erik/Melissa/Jenna/Christine: (gives Carlotta a weird look.)

Andre/Firmin: (rush over to help Carlotta)

Andre: Signora! Are you alright…did you hurt anything?

Carlotta: I be alright. Thank you signor.

Firmin: you are quite welcome.

Erik: (opens his mouth and points to his throat, making the sickening motion)

Christine: (laughs and slaps erik lightly on the shoulder.)

Erik: they are sucking up to her like a child sucks on a lollipop! It's is disgusting!

Jenna: The strange lady has a weird hair cut! (she laughs)

Carlotta: I beg your pardon! Who do you think you are!

Firmin: nobody talks to the Prima Donna like that!

Jenna: (whispers to Erik) the crazy man is Angry…

Erik: (laughs) you're funny when you're sugar high…

Jenna: Sugar! Where! (goes running around like a mad woman and then crashes into a tree)

Erik: (still laughing) I stand corrected!

Christine: (glares at Jenna) 'Erik never laughed at anything I did.'

_Well face it Christine you're not a sugared Phan girl who craves Erik's attention…you have his love…ahh that sounded Gay._

No one seems to hear this voice, except for Christine, and continues with what they are doing. Jenna is on the ground, Erik is smiling at the sight, Andre and Firmin and having a conversation with Carlotta and Melissa is also laughing at Jenna.

Jenna: ooh my head…what happened.

Erik: you ran into a tree…looking for sugar.

Jenna: really? Well that was stupid.

Erik: (frowns) Damn! The sugared Jenna is gone.

Melissa: (With clear sarcasiim) oh no!...boo hoo.

Erik: (looks to Melissa.) how come everyone likes to ruin my fun!

Melissa: you didn't remember my name!

Erik: and your point….

Melissa: well you should just go to…

Jenna: Melissa!

Melissa: what? I was going to say that he should go to the circus if he wants entertainment.

Jenna: oh…he he.

Erik: what? What did you think she was going to say?

Jenna: umm well…

Firmin: (who was ease dropping on their conversation.) I think mademoiselle Jenna was going to say "Go to hell" but that couldn't be done seeing he is already in hell.

Erik/Jenna: (glares at Firmin)

Jenna: Do not, I repeat do not EVER call me Mademoiselle again…I am not French…ok I am…but I do not live in France!

Erik: and I am not in hell! I might have been but I am not anymore!

Melissa: well you might as well consider your self in because America is a real Hell.

Jenna: OH yeah.

Erik: uhhh…Right…you people know that I said I was an Angel in hell…I was mad at heart broken and stuff like that…so now im just an Angel on Earth.

Jenna/Melissa: AWWWW! (Goes and hugs Erik)

Erik: oh no…

After a few minutes of struggling he finally gives in and hugs them back.

Christine: (who is furious with jealousy) ERIK!

Erik: (lets go of Melissa and Jenna) oh dear Lord!

Firmin: (whispers to Andre) I think it's 'that' time of the month for Miss Daae.

Andre: Yes let's run.

Andre and Firmin go and hide behind a bush.

Carlotta: What? What es eet? (Sees Christine charging at Erik) Eek! (Goes and hides with Andre and Firmin)

Christine: how come you hug them? Huh? How come you're hugging them and not me! Do I mean nothing to you!

Erik: no Christine…I uhhh…they just felt bad for me…I am just pleasing Phangirls is all. (Christine knocks him to the ground and then he screams well like…like Raoul)

Now this surprises everybody. Jenna and Melissa stare at him wide eyed and Andre, Firmin and Carlotta peer out from behind the bush...

Andre: did the Opera Ghost just scream like a girl?

Jenna: no he just screamed like a Raoul.

Erik: Mommy…

Melissa: did he just cry for him mommy? His mother hates him! And he hates his mother!

Erik: Mme. GIRY!

AS if on cue Mme: Giry flew out of the light vortex.

Mme: what in the world?

Mme Giry looks around and saw Erik on the ground cowering from a harmonial Christine.

Mme Giry: Christine!

Christine: (looks up) Mme: Giry…

Jenna: oh yes…a perfect little Angel…so innocent

Christine: (gives Jenna a glare)

Jenna: (returns it) I can be a harmony teenager too.

Christine: Oh really

Jenna and Christine go into a battle of who can be the most cranky teenager during their 'you know what'

Erik: I find this oddly disturbing.

Andre/Firmin: indeed.

A/n: okay so that's where I am leaving you! Where Jenna and Christine are battling, Erik, Firmin and Andre are disturbed by the conversation…and Carlotta and Melissa are both watching in amusement…and Mme. Giry well she just watches…also a little disturbed by it…

Review Reply's!

Talking Crazy Squirrel: oh do I have too. Why? I don't want …looks at readers oh hello…it's me again I am here to give you all review replies…stay tuned.

LA Carlotta Guidicelli: Yeah well it is…I put Carlotta in just as you asked of me…but as you can tell I am not a big fan of hers…but please keep reviewing!

Elf of rohan: why thank you…I didn't know Jenna was going to be such a big hit…I will tell you the secret behind Jenna at the end of the story! Muh ha ha ha! So u will just have to wait!

Darkmoonlightbright: why thank you…I would have never of dreamed my story would be this funny…wow! And if you saw the movie when Firmin sings "Dear Firmin just a brief reminder my salary has not been paid send it care of the Ghost by return of post…P.T.O…no one likes a debtor so its better if my orders are obeyed.." P.T.O I figured out is Phantom of the Opera... I they just don't include "of" just like in U.S.A they don't say U.S.O.A so it's P.T.O. instead of P.O.T.O. get it?

leotabelle13: yes that whole Idea was Melissa's. Yes the character in the story… she gave me the idea to upduct Raoul so say thank you!

POTOlvr24: so how is your character doing? I am doing a good job on her?

Wandering child24: thanks! Im glad you like it…please keep reviewing.

Catnipp: oh yeah…I forget about her…I like her I just like Erik more! (Grins evilly) thank you! The junk business story was pretty interesting wasn't it? LOL keep reviewing!

Talking Crazy Squirrel: ok that's enough! I need to go back…My master is losing her sugar highness. Finally! See'yall again…hopefully not soon.


	8. He's WHAT?

A/n: Hey Ppls Im back! But sad to say I do not have my talking Squirrel of doom. He ran up a tree a few days ago and hasn't come down. But I do have my crazy squirrel, she doesn't talk. She's just crazy whenever she sees a nut or something. Anyway give a call out to my Talking squirrel if you want him to come back.

Now where were we? Ah yes…Christine and Jenna were in a fight on who could be the most harmonal teenager. Erik, Andre, and Firmin were disturbed buy it while Carlotta and Melissa were amused. Mme. Giry was also quite disturbed.

Jenna: oh yeah! Well I heard that its worse when you are younger! And I am younger than you!

Christine: oh…and how old are you?

Jenna: 14

Christine: oh wow. Two years.

Jenna: well do you remember when you were fourteen.

Christine: umm...

Jenna: Ha! Point proven.

Christine: Fine you win.

Erik: (who was sleeping in the corner) huh…oh what it's over?

Andre: yeah were have you been.

Erik: sleeping…over there. It got boring after a while. (HA! You thought he was going to explode with anger or something? Didn't you? HA!)

Firmin: I agree.

Andre: I don't mean to intrude but…LOOK! he points to the sky

Everyone looks at the sky and there is the space ship. Suddenly Raoul comes flying out.

Aliens: Agh! How the hell do you deal with that thing! Im never going near a fop again!

Raoul sits on the ground looking around, and he is rather…umm large.

Christine: Dear God Raoul what happened!

Erik: Uh…wow.

Carlotta: Eesh. That is an unpleasant sight!

Andre and Firmin come and take her away.

Erik: Dear God in heaven what have you been eating?

Jenna: it's not fat that's making him like that!

Melissa: yeah…we know what's goin on with Raoul de Chagney.

Erik/Christine: what?

Jenna: Ummm well…

Melissa: yes…you see in this game we have in our time, theres this game called the Sims. In which you get to control other people lives.

Erik: can you show me this game? I want to destroy the fop!

Jenna: YEAH! You can set him on fire!

Erik: Oh YAY!

Melissa: may I please continue

Erik/Jenna: yes go on…

Melissa: thank you…anyway there is a new…edition to this game where people…men…get abducted by aliens.

Erik: like Raoul?

Melissa: precisely, and when they come back they're umm well umm…you see…(whispers) pregnant.

Erik: what was that? I didn't quite hear it…

Melissa: (whispers but slightly louder) pregnant

Erik: still did not hear you…

Melissa: (shouting in frustration) Hes fricken pregnant you imbecile!

Erik: Oh…(burst out laughing)

Jenna: yeah exactly and…ERIK WATCH OUT!

Erik: huh? AHH! (gets out of the way just in time to avoid a zooming car) Blimey what was that!

Jenna: dude…you are not Australian…you are French.

Erik: what ever. And how would you know just because I live in france doesn't mean I originated from there.

Melissa: if you were from Australia, then they're would be at least a hint of accent in your voice because I don't know how long you've lived here but you're like 30 something years old so..

Erik: are you calling me old?

Melissa: no! no! no! I was just pointing out that umm…

Erik: (Waits for Melissa to answer while fingering his lasso)

Melissa: umm, umm, umm…

Jenna: answer will you! He is starting to get annoyed!

Melissa: I cant think of a nice answer.

Erik was about to say something when the car came back and a tough looking man came out of the drivers seat.

TLM: Yo dude. What the hell is your problem.

Erik: what are you talking about?

TLM: Listen dude, I don't want to start nuttin but I will if you don't stop bitching around.

Erik: I beg your pardon, I don't think you know who you are talking too!

TLM: I don't care all I want to know is why the hell you were in my way.

Erik: well maybe I just wanted to…

Melissa: you see, uh sir, he is half blind and half deaf so he never heard or saw your car coming.

Erik: I am n..

Jenna: (clasps her hand over erik's mouth)

Andre: Opera Ghost! I was wondering…(stops when he sees what is before him) what's going on?

TLM: who's the dude with the funky do?

Andre: I do not understand a word you just said but I…I take it as an insult!

Jenna: there you go, with the stuttering again. You're always stuttering.

Andre: am not.

TLM: I don't care! I just want to know what the deal is with the dude in the mask!

Erik: (escapes from Jenna's grasp) Sir! I will not allow you to call me dude anymore! I don't know what the hell a dude is but I don't care either!

TLM: you have a problem with me man?

Erik: yes..i do. (fingers lasso)

Christine: Oh no! Erik you will not kill anymore people I will not allow it!

Jenna: Yes! I will not allow it either!

Melissa: or me!

Jenna: yes we don't want another incident like that.

Erik: Well I cant help it! Alright! Although it seems like I am better im not! I am still the phantom at heart! I still have the desire to do things that I did back then! Its not fair! Why me!

TLM: wow. This dude is creepy im out of here! (gets in his car and drives away)

Everyone cheers.

Jenna: yay you got him to go away erik! Bravo.

But Erik is still sitting on the ground sad.

Erik: its not fair, it's not fair, it's not fair.

Jenna, Christine, Melissa: (go hug Erik)

A/n: the ending is a bit on the sad side but no matter. Hmm…poor Erik. Will he ever get over it…damn TLM he made Erik feel bad. Phantom fans msut unite and kill this TLM…once I figure out where he went. LOL. So Please review! REVIEW!


	9. smart Raoul and other crazy stuff

A/n: sorry for the wait. It's the end of summer and now im starting High School so I'll be busy a lot and the updates will be further apart. Sorry. But Review and ill do it as fast as I can.

Chap. 9

_Last time _

_TLM: wow. This dude is creepy im out of here! (gets in his car and drives away)_

_Everyone cheers._

_Jenna: yay you got him to go away erik! Bravo._

_But Erik is still sitting on the ground sad._

_Erik: its not fair, it's not fair, it's not fair._

_Jenna, Christine, Melissa: (go hug Erik)_

Carlotta: (to jenna/Melissa/Christine) How are you hugging him?

Andre: Yes. I wouldn't hug him if he was the last man on earth.

Melissa: well that's because you're a guy…wait.

Mme. Giry: Now Monsieur, Signora, that's not very nice. Erik is…Erik has…

Erik: Oh thanks Madame, your making things much easier for me.

Jenna: What she is trying to say is that Erik has a good heart, sometimes… it proves that because he lets Raoul and Christine go.

Erik: Which I totally regret.

At this point Raoul is still totally clueless whats going on with him.

Raoul: Christine…How come I'm so fat…

Melissa: because you're pregnant you stupid fop.

Raoul: (pouts)

Jenna: agh mood swings.

Raoul: But im a man…

Erik: sure about that?

Raoul: (stupidly sends a death glare to him) like I was saying…Im a man how could I get pregnant?

Erik: with you anything is possible.

Mme. Giry: Erik, just because you don't like him doesn't mean you have to be so mean.

Jenna: but he's more than just a disliked person! He's a Fop!

Firmin: but he's our patron.

Melissa: _was_ your patron. Since the Opera Populaire burnt down you're not the managers anymore.

Andre: Oh no! Firmin. We're out of a job! We have no place to go! We're gonna die!

Jenna: Chill dude, the Opera Populaire is going to be rebuilt.

Firmin: but we need to return to our century before we can do anything.

Erik: True that. But there's only one problem. THERE IS NO WAY TO GET BACK!

Raoul: But isn't Jenna the one who got us here?

Everyone stares at Raoul.

Melissa: did he just say something…smart?

Erik: I believe he did…

Carlotta: It does not matter! WE must get information out of that Jenna girl.

Jenna: Hey! My name is not "that jenna girl" (sees everyone…except Melissa…staring at her with a look in their eyes.) oh no!

_Everyone chases after the running jenna. Except for Raoul who cant get up. _

Raoul: will someone please help me up?

_Everyone continues to chase Jenna._

Raoul: Guess not…

_Christine finally pins her to the ground._

Christine: Ha! I've got her! Erik hurry bring the lasso.

Jenna: What you're going to kill me?

Erik: Perhaps…

Jenna: (screams)

Raoul: WAIT!

_Everyone turns to look at Raoul._

Raoul: If you kill her than we'll never find a way back.

Erik: you know what…Im starting to like this Raoul.

Jenna: Yes me too! Thank you Raoul you saved me!

Raoul: (looking hopeful)

Jenna: But I am not giving you a hug.

Raoul: (whines)

Jenna: Christine! Get off of me!

Christine: Why?

Jenna: Because if you don't ill be forced to take drastic measures.

Christine: like what?

Jenna: Well…Your father died leaving you by your self with no one, except the profound Angel of music who is really a murderous Phantom who has a major obsession with you who in the end kidnaps you and threatens to kill your fiancé who is now pregnant.

Christine: (goes off crying)

Erik: Oh look! Now you made her cry! (goes to comfort Christine)

Firmin: Wow. You're good.

Jenna: why thank you.

Andre: using you're opponents weaknesses against them…Hey! Ghost! Christine Loves Raoul and not you!

Melissa/Jenna: (slaps their own forehead)

Melissa: You realize that will make him angry not go off and cry…

Andre: oh yeah…oh crap!

Erik: I'll deal with you later Monsieur!

Andre: Meep! (runs and hides behind firmin.)

Jenna: Wow! We have walked far! Look it's Stop and Shop!

Melissa: it's super stop and shop!

Jenna: whatever.

A/N: Well that's it for now. What will happen to Andre? Will Christine ever recover? And what's gonna happen at Stop and Shop?

Some random voice: SUPER stop and shop!

Me: WHATEVER!

Review please! Only 10 more until I reach 50!


	10. Possesed at Stop and Shop

_Disclamier: I do not own Phantom of the Opera OR monty python and the holy Grail. _

_Chap. 10_

_Last time:_

_Jenna: Wow! We've walked far! Looks it's stop and shop!_

_Melissa: it's SUPER shop and stop_

_Jenna: Whatever _

Erik: Wow! That's some big building. Is that like an Opera House or something?

Jenna: No you doosh, it's a grocery store.

Erik: A what kind of store?

Raoul: I DON'T CARE I WANNA GO IN!

Jenna: OH no! you have to stay out here, I wont be seen with a uhh Pregnant man. And Andre, Firmin, and Carlotta you stay with them!

Carlotta: That is not-a fair-a. I-a deserve-a to go In to.

Andre: Yeah…what she said!

Melissa: you don't deserve anythinhg, not even that fat husband of yours!

Carlotta: He is not-a fat-a. (remembers that he is dead and starts to cry)

Melissa: OH yeah! I forgot Erik killed the dude while trying to get to christine by playing Don Juan.

Random guy: MURDERER!

Erik: Shut up!

Christine: Erik is not a murderer he just kills people…oh wait that is a murderer nevermind!

Erik: oh thank you so much Christine.

Christine: You're welcome!

Firmin: why is she all of a sudden so dumb!

Oh sorry! that would be my fault! Sorry Christine, ill change you back immeidatly.

Christine: Quite alright authoress i… (feels a vibe rushing through her)

Erik: Christine?

Christine: (in a rich british accent) I say what in the world was that!

Oops sorry, my bad again.

Christine: (still in bristish accent) (to Erik) I say ol' chap would you like a spot of tea…(feels another vibe going through)

Erik: Thannk you for changing her that accent was killing me.

Christine: O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse thy name, or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I shall no longer be a Capulet.

Melissa: (to authoress) Shakespeare?

Oh my Gosh So sorry! Ill get it right this time!

Erik: You better. I cant take much more of this.

Christine: (about to speak but feels another vibe going through her)

Erik: Are you better now?

Mme. Giry: Erik?

Erik: Yes?

Mme. Giry: I think…(feels a vibe going through her) (in a rich French accent, more so then what she already had.) I don't want to talk to you know more you empty headed animal food through wiper. I Fart in your general direction you're mother was a hamster and you're father smelt of elderberries. (back to normal) oh my gosh im so sorry. I don't know what came over me!

I think im going to have fun with this.

Erik: You! You are possessing us all!

Yes! Muh ha ha!

Jenna: (feels a vibe and says to all of them, especially erik.) You don't frighten us English pig dogs go and boil you're bottoms you sons of a silly person I blow my nose at you so called "arthur king" You and all you're silly English K-nig-ets. (puts hands up to ears and does a raspberry)

Andre: what a strange person.

Melissa: (also feeling a vibe) Ekky, Ekky, Ekky, Ekky, PTANG, Zoom-Boing, Z'nourrwringmm.

(A/N if you could not tell I have a major fascination with Monty Python and The Holy Grail)

Erik: you people are scaring me.

Andre: (pointing to Erik) He's a witch!

Firmin: Well how do you know that he is a witch.

Andre: He turned me into a newt!

Firmin: A newt?

Andre: I got better.

Jenna: Well are we going to go into stop and shop or what?

Erik: Yes! Let's go! I want to get out of this crazyness.

Erik, Jenna, Christine, Melissa and Mme. Giry walk to the entrance of stop and shop. But before they enter jenna turns around.

Jenna: Follow! But! Follow only if ye be men of valour, for the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived! Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair. So, brave knights, if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth.

Erik: What an eccentric performance.

They walked into Stop and Shop and They were all surprised when nobody was looking at them after all they were wearing old fashioned clothes (Except for Melissa and Jenna) and Erik had a mask on his face. Just then a man came up behind Erik

Random man: Old woman!

Erik: (turns and glares at the man) man!

Random: Sorry man. Do you know where I could find the frozen department?

Erik: 37

RM: What?

Erik: Im 37 im not old.

RM: Well I cant just couldn't just called you man.

Erik: You could say Erik.

RM: I didn't know you were called Erik.

Erik: Well you didn't bother to find out did you?

RM: Well I did say sorry about the "old woman." Thing but from behind you looked…

Erik: What I object to is that you automatically treat me like an inferior.

RM: well this is a free country.

Erik: Oh a free country eh? And how did it become a free country. By exploiting the workers! By hanging on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society.

RM: you scare me dude…(he turns and leaves)

Erik: There is that dude thing again.

Ha! Ha! I even Possesed you and some Random Guy!

Erik: Oy Vey. You again.

Well that's not very nice of you Erik!

Erik: Well im not a nice person.

Jenna: (popping out from one of the aisles) True that!

Erik: You be quiet!

Jenna (goes back to shopping)

The manager hears of what is going on and comes out of the office and goes up to Erik

Manager: excuse me sir, im going to have to ask you to leave.

Erik: Oh? And why would that be?

Manger: well you're cuasing a distruption.

Erik: (examines the manager) don't I know you from somewhere?

Ha! End! Who is this the manager? Where has erik seen him? Hmm…the world may never know. Well until I update! PLEASE REVIEW! ONLY 6 more Reviews until 50! Ill be a happy camper if I get 50! And I don't like camping. Lol! No but seriously PLEASE REVIEW!


	11. The killer rabbit!

Erik: Don't I know you from somewhere?

Manger: Um…well you do look kind of familiar.

Erik: yes, yes, it's just slipping my mind at the moment.

Melissa: It's the TLM!

Erik/Manger: the who?

Melissa: The Tough Looking man, duh!

Erik and the manager(TLM) look confused.

Melissa: look dude you almost ran over Erik with your car.

Manger/TLM: Oh you!

Erik: You work at Stop and Shop?

Manger/TLM: Hey look, I had to quit High School, to get a job, to help my sick mother. (begins to cry) I have nothing else to do!

Jenna: AW. It's alright man, we understand. Everyone has a comapassionate side. Even Him. (points to Erik)

Erik: Huh? Oh…what?

Jenna: Ok then, anyway…(pauses when she hears something) what is that?

Melissa: Yea I hear it too…

Erik: What I don't hear anything.

Suddenly a group of rabid fangirls come through the entrance, with one of our own members, Erik For President leading the charge. (Erik for President asked me a few chapters ago to put it in the chapter. So I am doing it)

Erik For President: CHARGE!

The group of rabid phan girls attack the TLM.

Jenna: umm…wow.

MEANWHILE…..

Raoul is on a bench humming a little tune to himself completely oblivious to the men and women a few feet away from him, talking about him.

Firmin: ok…what should we do with him?

Andre: yes no one wants to look at him in that condition.

Carlotta: no body wants to look at him even if he wasn't like that.

Andre/Firmin: Agreed.

Andre: I say we should steal Erik's Punjab, tie Raoul up and throw him in the lake!

Firmin: Do you volunteer?

Andre: Hell no!

Firmin: well then that plan is out.

Carlotta: I say we make Erik tie Raoul up and throw him in the lake.

Andre: she's a genius!

Firmin: like he would ever listen to us?

Carlotta: he hates Raoul as much as we do! Even more!

Firmin: yes but what about Christine?

Andre: oh yes and he is quite amused by the sight of him.

They all think…

Firmin: I know what we can do!

Carlotta/Andre: what?

Firmin: we could Rant on about how Erik got Christine and he didn't.

Andre: brilliant!

They all walk over to Raoul.

Andre: Oh…vicomte.

Raoul: yes?

Andre/Firmin/Carlotta: Erik got Christine! Erik got Christine! Erik got Christine and you did not! HA HA HA HA HAA!

Raoul: Who got who?

Andre: Erik got Christine.

Raoul: ohh…he got her what? A puppy? I like puppies. Or…a cookie? I love cookies. Or a present? I love presents especially on Christmas when they are all tied up in pretty shiny paper and have a bow on top. (and I apologize to all those people who do not celebrate Christmas, it's just that I do and im not used to anything else.)

Firmin: oh God help us.

Just then Erik came running out of stop and shop.

Melissa: SUP…

I KNOW! SUPER stop and shop, screaming. He ran over and placed Raoul in front of him.

The TLM came running out, fuming.

Erik: you wouldn't hurt a pregnant lady would you?

TLM: (looks at Raoul) if you would please step aside mame.

Erik: NO! stay put!

Raoul moves over.

Erik: EXCUSE ME!

Raoul: He asked me nicely.

Erik: Raoul, will you please…oh hell, there is no way I am talking sweetly to A fop!

TLM: ALLLLRIGHTY than! (a bit of jim carrey for ya) anyway back to business.

Erik: NO! its not my fault I have Phangirls!

TLM: TOO BAD! You've hurt me too many times!

Jenna: WAIT!

TLM/Erik: What?

Jenna: I suggest that nobody moves.

TLM: what are you a robber?

Jenna: no. but the…the..

TLM: the what?

Jenna: The killer rabbit is right behind you.

TLM: the what?

Erik: the killer rabbit dim whit, didn't you hear her?

TLM: (glares at Erik)

Erik: Eeep.

Raoul: OOO! A BUNNY!

Jenna: RAOUL NO!

Raoul: but…I want to pet the bunny.

Jenna: It will kill you.

Erik: Oh jenna. Let him pet the bunny, please!

Raoul: (pouts and looks like he about to cry) I wanna…I wanna…I wanna…pet the bunny!

Firmin: oh for pete sakes. Let him pet the God Damn bunny, its not like his death will affect anyones lives.

Jenna: on the contrary, dear firmin, the life growing inside of him at this very moment will get harmed in his death.

Melissa: (who was just coming out of the store) that sounded so wrong.

Erik: I agree. And anyway, its been touched by Raoul….and an alien!

Melissa: cant forget the alien!

Erik: true dat.

TLM: wait, wait, wait. I thought you said that (points to Raoul) was a lady.

Erik: well he's not a lady per se.

TLM: oh really? Then what, per se, is he?

Erik: He's a foppish boy, who once stole my lovely Christine away from me, then got upducted by aliens only to come back pregnant.

TLM: oh yea, and im supposed to believe that!

Erik: yes you are.

Raoul: I WANT TO PET THE BUNNY!

Jenna: you cant! You see that's no ordinary rabbit. That's the most foul, cruel, bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!

Carlotta: wouldn't that be Erik?

Erik: that was un called for.

I guess that's where im gonna leave you. I cant think of anything else. I HATE WRITERS BLOCK!

PLEASE REVIEW! I really want to reach 50! I only have 3 0r 4 more reviews to go! So if you please will review, ill be happy!

Heres a thought. If you don't review, you wont get an update for a while.

NO MORE MISS NICE AUTHORESS.

If you don't review that is.

And about Erik For President. She gave me sugar! So if u wish to be in it. Please donate to the J.L.S foundation.


	12. the library

A/n: See authors note on bottom….

Ch. 12

Jenna: Hey look we're at the library!

Melissa: why that we are…

Erik: That's some big library, imagine how many books are in there! (Starts to run toward the library)

Jenna: Whoa, whoa, hold on there mister. You Probably know all of the stuff in there anyway.

Erik: true…

Andre/Firmin/Carlotta: HELP US!

Jenna/Melissa/erik: (turn to see Andre, firmin, and Carlotta trying to keep a pregnated Raoul from petting the killer rabbit.)

Jenna: You're still on with that? For pete sakes enough with the Monty Python.

_Alright, alright. I'll stop it. _

The rabbit disappears and Andre Firmin and Carlotta all smirk and let Raoul go, making him pounce on cement.

Jenna: Ew. That can't be good for the humien. (and yes I meant to spell it that way)

Melissa: the what?

Jenna: the Humien, it's a mixture of the word alien and human.

Erik: riiiiight… anywho…

Jenna: right! I can tell you want to go into the library, I have something to show you anyway.

Erik: Yes!

Jenna: All normal people, wait everybody here is abnormal so…every person who is not Raoul come with me.

Raoul: you're going to leave me all alone?

Erik: yea he's right, someone needs to watch him, if he isn't he could run into the middle of the road…on second thought, leave him.

Christine: (who has seemed to come out of nowhere) No! I will not leave Raoul un attended.

Everyone looked shocked except Raoul who had a smile on. ( Put a smile on, put a smile on, every body come on put a smile on! Sorry, my mom made a mistake on giving me a brownie…)

Raoul: thank you…

Erik: Christine!

Christine: Erik just because I love you doesn't mean that I have to hate him! He's my friend!

Raoul: Ah damnit.

Erik: Ha! You lose again! FOP!

Christine: (slaps Erik)

Andre: Ha The Opera Ghost just got slapped by a girl!

Erik: I have a name you know! And…I cant hit christine back because that would be improper. I would slap you too, but again that would be improper.

Jenna/Melissa: (bursts out into laughter)

Andre: (looking clueless)

Firmin: I believe that The Op…Erik just called you a lady.

Andre: no, he didn't.

Everybody except andre and erik: yes he did.

Jenna: ok, we've established that Erik just called andre a lady, and lets face it sometimes he can act like one, but anyway, I have an educated way on how we will chose who stays outside with Raoul.

Everyone: What is it?

Jenna: Well first Erik ,Christine, and Melissa stay behind me. Then it is a little game called iney, menie, miny, mo. Andre stand there, firmin stand there, and Carlotta stand there.

Everybody gets into their postisitons and jenna starts it, pointing at each one.

"Enie Menie miny mo, catch a tiger by the toe, if he hollers let him go, enie, menie, miny, mo. My mother says to pick the very best one and you are it."

Her finger lands in firmins direction.

Jenna: well firmin, it seems you are chosen.

Firmin: b..

Jenna: Up! no If, ands or buts…or I's, or you's or he's or any pronoun.

Firmin: You've got me.

Jenna: Of Course, im good like that. Alright alright Firmin, youre watching Raoul. So Everybody else come with me!

They entered the library. Carlotta and andre went off to find something and Erik started toward the books.

Jenna: Oh no you do not. Come here I need to show you something.

Erik groaned but followed her and Melissa to the video section. Jenna skimmed the videos.

Jenna: Aha! (she takes a tape off the shelf) look!

Erik: Wow. They really did make a movie out of our lives. (takes the tape out of jennas hand and looks at it.) You know…the mask is on the wrong side of my face.

Melissa: yea we noticed and it also looks like your nails are painted.

Erik:What?

Melissa: yea! Look!

Erik: Dear Lord theses people are mad!

Librarian: Shhh!

Erik: You Shh! I just found out that someone screwed their facts up about me!

Jenna/Melissa: (slap their fore-head)

Librarian: Listen wise guy, this is a library. And in a library you have to be quiet, I am a librarian and my job is to make sure it stays quiet. You got it?

Erik: fine.

Librarian leaves

Jenna: touchy…

Erik: are all old ladys like that in your time?

Melissa: no, not really. Some are, but most are nice, like grandmas although some grandmas are mean.

Erik: Yeah, I know what you mean, sometimes Mme. Giry can be a little moody.

Jenna: Yeah, it's called menopause…

Mme. Giry: I heard that Erik!

Erik: I didn't do anything!

Mme Giry: Don't lie I heard you say it! Now come here!

Erik: no!

Mme giry: Alright then! (grabs Erik by his ear and drags him along)

Erik: ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

Jenna: Where'd she come from?

Melissa: I dunno.

ESA

A/n: alright that is where I am going to leave you, and just a little note, updates will be longer because of school and stuff, it will be like that for all my other stories too, for those of you who read them. And plus I have major writers block for one of them, that's why I haven't updated in a while.

I'd like to thank all the people who helped me get to 50 reviews! Which were not many, cuz people didn't review for a while I started getting like 1 or 2 reviews for each chapter! I mean come on people that's sad! I checked and I got 1165 hits and only 54 reviews! That is not good! I really would like to know what you people think of my stories, if its funny, and even if its bad, I need to know what kind of writer I am, my friends tell me that this is funny, and I am a good writer but I need to know from strangers. So please tell me what you think! Please I beg on my knees!

Come on ill even make Erik beg.

Erik: say what?

Me: (kicks him)

Erik: ow! Ok, ok, (with no enthusiasm) please review for this story…

Me: (glares at him)

Erik: fine! (falls to knees and with very much emotion) OH PLEASE REVIEW FOR THIS STORY IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH TO THIS AUTHORESS! There is that better?

Me: Perfect. Thank you, now all you who are a phan of erik would review, to please him…


	13. The Craziness That started it all

60 reviews people! I AM HAPPY! Now Keep it up so I can get to 100 and be really happy! Super happy! Hell I'll even like Raoul! (and for those people who know me! You all know how I despise Raoul!) 100 reviews is my next goal people! Please make a young authors goal be succeeded.

Now Like I promised because you took a little bit of time to review for me, I will take the time and write for you. This process will continue as long as you review! It works that way, you give me what I want, and ill give you what you want, k? k.

Ch.13 The crazyness that started it all.

They all left the library, by one way or another and met Firmin and Raoul outside.

Firmin: Finally I thought you would never get out of there! Being here with him with torture.

Raoul: I want Ice-cream!

Melissa: Apparently he has a craving for ice-cream.

Just then an ice-cream truck zooms by the library.

Raoul: ICE-CREAM!

Jenna: hold up there Foppy man!

Raoul: I want ice-cream.

Jenna: I know you want ice-cream but ice-cream from the ice-cream truck cost money? Do you have money?

Raoul: Hmm…(reaches into his pocket) Aha! I have francs! ICE-CREAM IM COMING!

Jenna: Stay! This is America! WE don't use francs we use American money!

Raoul: but….i don't have American money.

Jenna: I know you don't! (turns to Melissa) Do you have any money?

Melissa: no! and why would I give it to him?

Jenna: well ,I don't have any money either. But! I do have ice-cream at home!

Raoul: aw! But its not the same!

At Jenna's home.

Erik: wow! You have a big house.

Jenna: oh please its medium sized, I mean its not a mansion.

Melissa: yeah see that's my house! (points to a house right next to jennas)

Andre: you live right next to each other?

Jenna/Melissa: Yeah.

Erik: that was freaky.

Jenna/Melissa: Oh My God!

Erik: Stop.

Jenna/Melissa: we always do that!

Erik: You are seriously freaking me out!

Jenna/Melissa: sorry.

Erik: aHHH!

Jenna: come on!

Jenna opens the door and everybody follows her. Two boys playing playstation look up at the intruders.

Annoying brother #1: Who are you?

Jenna: ignore them.

Annoying brother #2: (goes back to playstation)

AB1: Who are they? I don't think mom would allow strangers in here.

Jenna: Shut up Andrew!

Andrew: you shut up, Jenna!

Erik: now, now, That is no way to talk you your sibling.

Jenna: (to Melissa) you see that's another reason I love him.

Erik: I head that.

Jenna: good. Alright anyway, people go into the room over there and ill show you the movie!

Raoul: What about…

Jenna: Go in there and ill get you your ice cream.

Raoul: (runs into the den)

Melissa: wow he must've really wanted the Ice-cream.

Jenna: (nods and walks into the kitchen)

IN THE DEN:

Christine: Hey erik look it's a Piano!

Erik: What? Where?

Christine: (points to the piano in the corner of the room) (((I play Piano, I can proudly say I can play Music of the Night on the Piano. GO ME!)

Erik: YES! (rushes over to the piano) its not my organ but it will do. (starts playing)

Jenna: (from the kitchen) OK WHO TURNED ON THE RADIO!

Andre: No one that's The OP…Erik.

Erik: (Still at the piano) Nice save…

Jenna: (walking in with a bowl of ice-cream) seriously?

Melissa: yeah, look! (points to the piano)

Jenna: wow man you are good, do you thi…(she got cut off by Raoul taking the ice-cream out of her hands) ok, anyway, erik get up ill put on the movie.

Erik: (mumbles and goes to sit on the couch next to Christine.)

Jenna sets up the movie and the opening credits start,

'the phantom of the opera.'

Andre: Hey look! The Opera Populaire was built again!

Firmin: but look at the year 1919!

Andre: oh yeah…

Melissa: Hey look that's Raoul!

Raoul: (hearing his name, looks up from his ice-cream.) IM OLD!

The auctioneers voice fills the room,

"Lot 665 then, a paper mache, music box in the shape of a barrel organ, attached the figure of a monkey dressed in Persian robes, playing the symbols This item discovered in the vaults of the theatre still in working order ladies and gentleman."

Erik: Hey that's my music box!

"Mme. Giry 25 thank you madame"

Erik: Mme. Giry? What were you doing there?

Mme: Giry: to probably see what was for sale.

Erik: no I mean….never mind.

"Lot 666 then. A chandelier in pieces, some of you may recall the strange affair of the phantom of the Opera. A mystery never fully explained, were told ladies and gentleman that this is the very chandelier that figured in the famous disaster."

Everyone looks at Erik:

Erik: I couldn't control myself okay!

"our workshops have repaired it and while parts of it for the new electric light perhaps we can frighten away the ghost of so many years ago, with a little illumination. Gentleman!"

The Overture booms out of the speakers. And as the chandelier rises the black and white scene turns to color, going to the 1870 Opera House.

They all watch in amazement at this,

Andre: hey look! There we are! (he said pointing to him and firmin who were getting out of the carriage.)

Firmin: wow.

IT shows the ballet dancers blah blah blah, Carlotta on stage singing…blah blah blah, Raoul being introduced blah blah blah.

T.V. Christine: It's Raoul, at the house by the sea, I guess you could say we were childhood sweet hearts.

T.V. Meg: Oh Christine he's so handsome.

Erik: BAH! Handsome! Him!

T.V. Raoul: My parents and I are pleased to support all the arts especially the world renowned Opera Populaire.

Raoul: I was so skinny back then!

Melissa: well if you didn't go get abducted by aliens then that wouldn't be a problem would it?

Erik: where am I during all this?

Jenna: you don't know where you were?

Erik: well um no…

Jenna: well….probably stalking Christine.

Erik: hey!

Raoul walks by Christine,

T.V. Christine: He wouldn't recognize me.

T.V. Meg: He didn't see you.

Erik: well that's rude! I would never walk by Christine with out seeing her.

Raoul: I did? OH I'm such a bad person! Christine is that why you don't love me! If it is Im sorry!

Christine: Listen, its not because of that, oh never mind.

Raoul: Umm ok…(goes back to eating ice-cream)

Sorry that was short. Again I ran out of ideas:- (. But ill try an update sooner and make the chapters longer, but I cant promise that I will.

But please Review anyway, Ill be really happy if you do! Happy AUTHORESS!


	14. the movie and random Raoul

THE MOVIE AND RANDOM RAOUL:

So our crew is watching the movie in Jenna's den. Everybody is so into the movie including all the movie characters.

" I have a message sir from the opera ghost"

"Oh God in heaven you're all obsessed"

"He welcomes you to his opera house."

"_His_ Opera house."

"and reminds you that is salary is due."

"His salary!"

"What? Monsieur Lefavre used to give him 20,000 francs a month"

"20,000 francs!"

"Perhaps you can afford more with the vicomt as your patron"

Jenna: Oh that reminds me I was thinking about it and I realized that technically Raoul gives his money.

Melissa: (laughs) ha that's funny!

"but obviously we shall now have to cancel as it appears we have lost our star."

Erik: you ripped my letter

Firmin: well I thought it was all a prank I mean really who would believe in an Opera Ghost. And why would a ghost need money anyway!

"A full house andre we shall have to refund a full house!"

"christine daae could sing it sir."

Christine: you know I really don't appreciate you volunteering me to sing it.

Mme. Giry: Erik told me to! In his letter!

Christine: (Looks at Erik)

Erik: (looks innocent)

"andre this is doing nothing for my nerves"

"well she's very pretty"

Christine: thank you monsieur

Andre: what? Huh…oh. You're welcome. (turns to firmin) why is she thanking me?

Firmin: (Shrugs)

"Think of me think of me fondly…"

Melissa/jenna: (singing along) when weve said goodbye remember me once in a while please promise me you'll try, when you find that once again you long to take your heart back and be free…

Erik: how many times have you watched this movie?

Jenna: (Starts counting on fingers) ok ran out of fingers…(starts counting toes) well what do you know I ran out of toes too!

Erik: that many huh?

Melissa: we basically know everything.

Erik: oh really!

Jenna: alright then lets have it out! (pauses movie)alright mr. I-don't-think-these-girls-know-anything-phantom ask us some questions!

Andre: hold on! Can I ask the first one!

Erik: uh sure I guess.

Andre: yea! Ok Girls…this one is tricky…what color is my underwear?

Jenna and Melissa look at each other

Melissa: umm….white?

Andre: she's a genius!

Erik: If guessing the color of his underwear correct is classified as a genius I don't want to know aht he classifies as dumb!

Andre: well that's easy…Raoul!

Erik: well that's true…but if he thinks shes a genius (points to Melissa) then what the hell am i?

Andre: the smartest person in the world!

Erik: (smiles) ok he's now on my good side!

Andre: I suppose that is a good thing…

Jenna: yeah yeah yeah now Erik ask us some more questions!

Erik: alright then! Um…what was my nickname as a child?

Melissa/jenna: the devils child

Erik: wow that was quick….um…

Christine: hold on I've got a question.

Jenna: alright shoot.

Christine: shoot? Shoot who?

Jenna: no no, it means go ahead.

Christine: oh ok, what was my fathers name?

Melissa/Jenna: Gustave Daae. The famous Swedish violinst you were his only child orphaned at seven when you came to live and train the ballet dormitories.

Christine: um…wow.

Melissa/Jenna: told you we were good.

Erik: didn't I tell you to knock that off earlier.

Melissa/Jenna: yes.

Erik: so why aren't you listening!

Raoul: STOP STEALING MY LLAMAS!

Everyone looks at Raoul

Jenna: whoah that was random….

Raoul: What? you got a problem with being random! WHATS WRONG WITH BEING RANDOM! YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH RANDOM PEOPLE!

Melissa: wow, mood swings...

Erik: I've never seen the fop yell before he's actually pretty good at it.

Jenna: yea…too bad it will only last for a few more months…

Erik: are you serious! I like this Raoul! He's actually not foppish! How that is possible I do not know…

Raoul: you like me now?

Erik: Well…

Jenna: no he doesn't!

Erik: don't talk for me, if I didn't I would have said I didn't.

Raoul: so you don't like me? pouts for a moment im out of ice-cream! I want more! With sprinkles!

Jenna: sure…(grabs Raouls dish and walks into the kitchen)

Erik: I think, ill go umm help her…(walks into the kitchen)

Jenna: (singing while getting ice-cream)

(this is for my own personal pleasure im sorry for putting this in but I need to get some recognition here!)

Jenna: (singing) in sleep he sang to me in dreams he came, that voice which calls to me, and speaks my name. And do I dream again for now I find, the phantom of the opera is there inside my mind.

Erik: (singing) since once again with me, our strange duet my power over you grows stronger yet and though you turn from me to glance behind the phantom of the opera is there, inside your mind.

Jenna: Oh I didn't hear you come in!

Erik: many people don't hear me, hello am I called the opera ghost.

Jenna: true.

Erik: umm…well…you have a nice voice…

Jenna: really?

Erik: umm…well…yea..

Jenna: oh thank you Erik.

Erik: you're welcome.

Jenna: you're shy to admit it aren't you…

Erik: I am not!

Jenna: (looks at him)

Erik: ok well I've never told anyone other than Christine that they have a nice voice.

Jenna: it's ok. I feel really special, being complemented by the phantom of the Opera,

Erik: again you are most welcome.

Jenna: come on we best get his ice-cream to Raoul

Erik: hold on! You forgot the sprinkles.

Jenna: oh they're in that cabinet.

Erik: ok (grabs sprinkles and puts them on ice-cream) done!

Jenna: now it looks like a big pile of sprinkles.

Erik: well excuuuuuuuuuse me.

Jenna: come on.

They walk into the den and jenna hands Raoul his sprinkles…I mean ice-cream.

Raoul: I asked for Ice-cream with sprinkles not just sprinkles!

Jenna: (looks at Erik)

Erik: (repeats himself) well excuuuuuuuuuuse me.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. And I will try to update more often, I loathe writers block, I think writers block should join Raoul in the evil hole that he is in. I'm asking you to review! Please Review!


	15. We love you phantom

_**Im updating, and you've read my note, I probably wont be allowed access to the computer only to weekends so that means you won't get an update until the weekends. Sad I know. It hurts me too… but I hope this chapter will make you happy. **_

"We Love You Phantom"

Jenna: alright alright everybody! i've got a little surprise for you!

Everyone: oooo what is it?

Andre: Money?

Firmin: A way out of here?

Carlotta: My doggy?

Jenna: where were you the last hour?

Carlotta: you guys left me at the library so I asked someone at the library. Luckily somebody knew you.

Jenna: indeed…

Erik: a mask!

Christine: A new opera!

Raoul: Ice-cream!

Everyone: will you shut up!

Jenna: no, no, no it's something for erik.

Erik: me? You got me a present? Wow…that was unexpected.

Jenna: well it's not techinally a present..

Erik: oh... then what is it?

Jenna: we're going to sing you a song!

Erik: a song? And who's we?

Jenna: well me and Melissa.

Mme: Giry: Melissa and I.

Jenna: you don't know the song.

Mme. Giry: nevermind.

Jenna: ready missa?

Melissa: Ready!

Erik: oh dear…should I be afraid?

Melissa/Jenna: (singing) WE love you Phantom, oh yes we do, we love you phantom and we'll be true. When you're not with us we're blue oh phantom we love you!

Andre: well I must say that scared me.

Erik: umm….well thank you for that lovely…umm…(clears throat) song.

Jenna/Melissa: you want to hear it again?

Everyone: NO!

Melissa: alright, alright!

Mme. Giry: can we just get back to the movie?

Jenna: indeed.

The movie comes back on, it is at the part where the phantom is taking Christine down and they are singing "the phantom of the Opera."

Christine: oh hey I remember that!

Jenna: well no duh you were there!

Christine: you know, you 21st century people are very rude.

Jenna: oh yeah well you were very rude to erik!

Christine: I was?

Erik: when?

Jenna: you'll see at the end of the movie. I'll point out every time christine is rude!

Christine: fine.

After a few more minutes of watching Erik was growing bored and decided to do something funny.

Erik: oh hey, everybody watch this…Hey Raoul.

Raoul: Yes?

Erik: Barbie called she wants her hair back. (Thank you Phantom-Eriklover666 for letting me use her joke! Oh and p.s. Bob says hi to Rocky…)

Raoul: No, she gave it to me! Why should I give it back!

Jenna: ok…that was…weird.

Melissa: (cracking up)

Erik: ok wow. Not the answer I was planning on getting.

Jenna: oh hold on, lets try this again. Raoul

Raoul: what?

Jenna: your villiage called, they're missing their idiot.

Raoul: my villiage…oh well, tell them I miss them too!

Melissa: (cracks up harder)

Erik: I don't know how people like this guy…

Raoul: I want ice-cream.

Melissa: hey Raoul do you know the ice-cream song?

Raoul: (dreamily) There's an ice-cream song?

Melissa: yeah it goes, "I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice-cream."

Raoul: oh my gosh I love that song! "I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice-cream!"

Erik: oh thanks. Now he'll be singing that all day!

Jenna/Melissa: "WE love you phantom, oh yes we do, we love you phantom and we'll be true, when you're not with us we're blue oh phantom we love you!"

Raoul: "I scream…"

Jenna/Melissa: "We love you phantom oh yes…"

Raoul: "you scream, we all scream…"

Jenna/Melissa: "We do. We love you phantom, and we'll be true."

Andre: on top of spaghetti all covered with cheese, I lost my poor meat ball when somebody sneezed."

Raoul: "for ice-cream"

Jenna: "when you're not with us we're blue oh phantom we love…"

Erik: SHUT UP!

Andre, Jenna, Melissa and Even Raoul stops singing and looks at erik.

Erik: DEAR LORD YOU PEOPLE ARE ANNOYING, RAOUL SINGING ABOUT SOME STUPID ICE-CREAM. THOSE TWO BLOODY FOOLS ARE SINGING SOME STUPID SONG ON HOW THEY LOVE ME AND MY MANAGER IS SINGING ABOUT SPAGHETTI! HOW THE HELL DID I GET STUCK WITH SUCH IDIOTS!

Andre, Jenna, Melissa and Raoul all stare at the enraged Phantom they blink a couple times then go back to singing.

Jenna/Melissa: "We love you phantom.."

Raoul: "I scream…"

Andre: "it rolled off the table and out of the door.."

Erik: UGGH. THAT IS IT! I AM OUT OF HERE! (storms out of the room)

Jenna: you think we made him angry?

Melissa: nah, he's just exploding in happiness that we made a song for him.

Jenna: oh ok.

_**This one is a little short, sorry guys. It's the best I could do, I hope it makes you happy enough. I hope you review. If not I'll be sad. Boo hoo…It's late, and im sick, so im doing the best I can…I'll try to update as soon as possible for you guys, k? Thank you and have a nice day and don't forget to review. OR bob will come on to you with his paints.**_

_**Bob: Yes fear me and my paints! Muh ha haha! **_

_**Erik's Secret Admirer.**_


	16. The Meaning of Music of the night

"_**The meaning of music of the night" **_

Jenna: Hey it's been an hour and erik still hasn't come in yet…

Melissa: yeah I wonder if he's ok.

Jenna: lets go sing him a song!

Melissa: YEAH!

They run out of the room.

Andre: do those girls have any common sense? They don't know that he is angry at them for singing!

Firmin: apparently not.

Jenna and Melissa find Erik sitting outside on the stoop.

Jenna: (singing) When the news is all bad when you're sour and blue, when you start to get mad you should do what I do. Tell your self How Lucky you are!

Erik: oh no…

Melissa: (singing) When your life's going wrong, when the fates are unkind, when you're limping along and get kicked from behind. Tell your self how lucky you are.

Both: (singing) Oh, why de cry a cloudy sky, an empty purse and crazy universe…

Erik: it's crazy alright.

Both: My philosophy is simply things could be worse.

Jenna: so be happy you're here

Melissa: think of life as a thrill

Both: and if worse comes to worse, as we all now it will.

Erik: it already has!

Both: thank you're lucky star you've gotten this far! And tell your self! How lucky you are!

Jenna: How lucky, how lucky, how lucky you are!

Erik: You know _that's_ the reason I came out here in the first place.

Melissa: you don't like our singing?

Erik: No!

Jenna: you're a very rude person Erika

Erik: I kno…did you just call me Erika?

Jenna: nope.

Erik: I could have sworn you did.

Jenna: you're mistaken.

Erik: I am not, you called me Erika.

Jenna: why would I do that?

Erik: because you're pshycotic!

Jenna: _I'm_ Pshycotic. Well I least I don't go calling myself Phantom of the Opera, or Opera ghost, or Angel of music, or..

Erik: alright I get the picture.

Melissa: but she wasn't drawing anything…

Erik and Jenna look at Melissa.

Erik: She's your friend Jenna.

Jenna: well then. Lets go inside

Erik: you wont sing?

Jenna: no, I promise.

Erik: and what about her?

Melissa: I wont sing either.

Erik: ok good.

They all walk back in and sit down on the couch.

Raoul: Phantom thing..

Erik: Yes Raoul?

Raoul: um…your…mom called, and…um…

Andre: (leans over and whispers something)

Raoul: oh yeah! Your mom called, she wanted to remind you that you left Mr. Snuggelmuffins at her house last week.

Erik: ha ha nice try Raoul i… I did? I could have sworn I brought him home.

Everyone stares at erik.

Erik: what?

( I am so sorry people I had to put that in there. I despise Raoul and I love my Erik but I still had to do that!)

Jenna: Mr. Snuggelmuffins?

Erik: Be quiet. You know that monkey I have on my music box?

Jenna: yeah….

Erik: it his twin brother.

Melissa: okay. This guy is more weird that I thought.

Erik: oh like you don't have a stuffed animal.

Melissa: yeah no, im too old for that.

Erik: uh huh suuuure. We all know about Mr. waffle.

Melissa: Mr. Waffle?

Erik: yeah you know that purple turtle you have…

Melissa: I have no purple turtle.

Jenna: oh! Oh! But my talking crazy squirrel of doom has a stuffed animal. Charles!

Bob: you know I told you not to tell anyone that! That is not cool!

Christine: was it just me or did that squirrel just talk…

Andre: nope I heard it too.

Frimin: me too

Christine: ok good, I thought iwas going insane for a moment there.

Jenna: you are insane. One at anytime even considering Raoul over this sexy man, (goes over to erik)

Erik: get away from me.

Jenna: (walks away)

Christine: okay one! You would do the same if he threatned you with a chandelier!

Erik: I did not threaten _you_ with a chandelier.

Christine: and hello, he was a phantom. I was supposed to be afraid of him.

Jenna: well I wasn't scared of him once!

Christine: Because you weren't the one in it!

Jenna: yea,yea,yea blah blah blah.

Melissa: can we please get back to the movie?

Jenna/Christine: fine.

The movie comes back on and Erik is singing music of the night.

Christine: you know this is really weird seeing ourselves like that.

Erik: yea it kinda is.

"Floating, Falling sweet intoxication, touch me, trust me. Savour each sensation. Let the dream begin let your darker side give in to the power of the music that I write. The power of the music of the night."

Jenna: (shudders from sexiness of Gerry Erik's voice,)

Erik: what you cold or something…

Jenna: no…I mean yes! Will you warm me erik…

Erik: umm…no.

Jenna: well fine be that way. Ha! Oh look christine fainted!

Erik: Yeah why did you do that?

Christine: I don't know…maybe to add dramatic affect. Or maybe I was SCARED (looks at Jenna) of you.

Jenna: (sticks tongue out at christine)

Christine: gosh so immature.

"You alone can make my song take flight. Help me make the music of the night."

Jenna: you know…I…I'm just wondering. What does that mean?

Erik: what? The music of the night.

Jenna: Y..Yeah.

Erik: umm…you know I've never really thought about it, but when I wrote it, you know I love music and I am a creature of the night so.

Jenna: are you sure it doesn't mean something else. Snap, snap, grin, grin, wink, wink, nudge, nudge say no more. (who ever likes monty python outthere will get my meaning. Nudge, nudge wink, wink.)

Erik: I..um..dont quite follow you.

Jenna: Follow me follow, that's good, that's good, a nudge as good as a wink to a blind bat.

Erik: are you insinuating something?

Jenna: oh, no no no no….yes

Erik: well….

Jenna: well you're a man of the world, I mean you've been around a bit…I mean…uh…I mean you've done it.

Erik: I beg your pardon!

Bob: Hold up! there might be little children reading this…or squirrels that don't want to hear any of that. Thank you.

Jenna: but it's rated T!

Bob: I don't care I'm closing it right now! Good bye!

**_Yeah sorry, I wanted to get this chapter up. the ending was a little dirty I know but you all probably find it funny right? Right? After all who know what Erik's meaning for Music of the night is eh? Eh? If you didn't get that…try to get this _**

_**John: "They're going to….in the middle of the afternoon!" **_

_**Ben F: "Not everyone's from Boston John" **_

_**One of my favorite quotes from the play 1776. **_

_**And if you don't get that, go under a search and look for "nudge nudge" sketch from Monty Python. Then you'll get it. Have a nice day! Oh and HAPPY BIRTHDAY GERRY I LOVE YOU! **_


	17. Zombies!

**_A/N: sorry I haven't updated! Truly I am! I only hope you will still review! _**

Chap. 17: Zombies!

Jenna: Sorry for that. Bob is now in his cage where he belongs

Bob: let me out you crazy woman! I am no wild animal! Agh! –Runs around cage like a mad thing-

Jenna: I call that wild

Erik: can we please just watch the damn movie

Jenna: sure

-Music of the night just ended and it is the scene where Meg is in have christine's dressing room-

Melissa: oh very smart Erik leave the mirror open

Erik: oh well excuse me

Christine: oh wait. It was transparent?

Erik: -looks innocent-

Jenna: -coughs- pervert- coughs-

Erik: I am not! I am not that bad

Jenna: that bad? What does that mean?

Erik: umm…nothing… lets just get back to the um… thing.

Melissa: he's hiding something.

Jenna: oh yeah

Erik: I am not hiding anything! Geez you girls are so ANNOYING.

Jenna: oh yes…sure.

-Phone rings suddenly.-

Jenna: -sarcastically-oh let me get it, pretty please. –Gets up and answers the phone-

Jenna: hello?

Otherphangirl: hi jen-jen!

Jenna: oh hey Kate, sup?

Katie: nuttin…

Jenna: You wanna come over im watching POTO with a few…-looks at poto cast in her living room.-…friends…

Katie: sure! Ill be over there in a few minutes

Jenna: awesome see ya soon!

Katie: bye byezzz

Jenna: -walks back into den.-

Melissa: who was that?

Jenna: Katie she's coming over

Melissa: Awesome!

Erik: is she by any chance a…Phan…

Jenna: yes…not as much as me and Melissa but she's growing!

Erik: Splendid.

Jenna: -grins-

Melissa: oh hey look it's the scene where Erik gets insanely angry!

-everyone turns their attention to the TV. and right before erik goes insanely angry there is a knock on the door.-

Jenna: ill get it! –Gets the door- Katie!

Katie: Jenna!

-They hear in the next room- "Damn you! You little prying Pandora you little demon is this what you wanted to see! Curse you! You little lying Delilah!..."

Katie: he he you little lying Delilah…I love that line!

-they also hear Madame Giry go.-

Madame Giry: Erik! Dear Lord man no wonder she was afraid of you!

Erik: ….no one asked you!

Katie: was that…?

Jenna: -grins- come I would like to introduce you to my…friends…

-they walk in and when Katie sees Erik on Jenna's couch she stares in shocks then faints onto the floor-

Erik: well at least she's quiet…

Katie: -starts squealing in her unconscious state-

Erik: never mind….

Madame Giry: aren't you going to get mad I mean she just fainted at just seeing you?

Erik: no because she didn't faint because of my face but because she saw me...

Everyone: …

Jenna: that made no sense at all!

Erik: So's your face!

Melissa: what?

Christine: that didn't make sense

Erik: 'so's your face' always make sense

Firmin: Erik that's stupid

Erik: so's your face! Man I am on fire, hello!

Jenna: ….right…

Raoul: OH my God there's a dead girl on the floor!

Everyone: -stares at him weird-

Raoul: can I poke her with a stick?

Everyone: no!

Raoul: oh man….

Katie: -pops up from super short unconsciousness- hi im back!

Raoul: ZOMBIE! –Starts running away but not to fast cuz again he is pregnant (LOL)-

Katie: ok…-sees Erik again and squeals and faints again-

Erik: I really wish she'd stop doing that

Jenna: but she's doing it out of love!

Christine: hey!

Jenna: you had your chance evil woman! But noooo….you left it for…

Raoul: -comes running back in- ZOMBIE!

Jenna: …him…

Christine: I made a stupid decision I know but that's in the past

Melissa: oh yes sure…let me ask you this is Raoul was not a fop who would you have chosen.

Christine: …

Jenna: oh we got you! You see you don't love Erik! You just don't want to married to a stupid pregnant guy!

Christine: that's not true!

Mme. Giry: Christine Daae! Jenna….i don't know your last name! Stop fighting this instant!

Jenna/Christine: yes maam.

Raoul: -calms down- ok im good now

Melissa: sorry to break it to you but you will never be good

Raoul: fine! Be that way!

Melissa: fine! I will!

Raoul: fine!

Melissa: fine!

Raoul: fine!

Melissa: fine!

Raoul: fine!

Melissa: f…

Jenna: enough with "fines!"

Melissa/Raoul: fine!

Jenna: Agh!

T.V. Erik: come we must return those two fools who run my theatre will be missing you.

Andre: Hey!

Firmin: _your _theatre!

Erik: yes _my_ theatre! I lived there most of my life why shouldn't I own it!

Firmin: You live under the opera house! And pretended to be a ghost AND an angel AND a phantom right there are two totally different things! A ghost and a phantom are made by the devil and an angel lives in heaven you cannot be both!

Erik: well I am neither of those if you haven't noticed I am a man!

Raoul: -pokes Erik with a stick- nope not a ghost

Erik: -glares-

TV. Firmin: "Mystery after gala night it says mystery of sopranos flight mystified all the papers say we are mystified we suspect foul play. Bad news on soprano scene, first Carlotta now Christine, still at least the seats get sold gossips worth in weight in gold! What a way to run a business spare me these unending trials half your cast disappears but the crowd still cheers. Opera. To hell with gluke and Handel have a scandal and you're sure to have a hit!

T.V. Andre: Damnable! Will they all walk out this is damnable!

T.V. Firmin: Andre please don't shout its publicity, and the take is vast free publicity

T.V. André: but we have no cast!

TV F: Andre have you seen the ques, ah it seems you've got one too.

TV A: Dear Andre, What a charming gala Christine was in a word sublime. We were hardly bereft when Carlotta left on that note the diva's a disaster must you cast her when she seasons past her prime!

TV F: Dear Firmin, just a brief reminder my salary has not been paid send it care of the ghost…

Firmin: see! Theres the ghost business again!

Erik: be quiet!

TV F: …by return of post. PTO no one likes a debtor so it's better if my orders are obeyed!

TV Both: "Who would have the gall to send this? Someone with a puerile brain!

Erik: PURILE!

TV Both: these are both signed OG, who the hell is he?

Erik: are you kidding me?

TV Both: Opera Ghost! It's nothing sort of shocking he is mocking our position; in addition he wants money, what a funny apparition to respect a large retainer, nothing plainer he is clearly quite insane!

Erik: I BEG YOUR PARDON!

Jenna: truly Erik you can not tell me that you don't think you're insane

Erik: im not going to answer that

Jenna: as I thought.

T.V. Raoul: where is she?

T.V. F: you mean Carlotta?

T.V. R: I mean miss. Daae, where is she?

T.V. A: well how should we know?

T.V.: R: I want an answer I take it that you sent me this note

T.V. F: what's all this nonsense?

T.V.A: of course not!

T.V.R: you didn't send it?

T.V. A: Of course not!

TV F: We're in the dark!

TV: monsieur don't argue! Isn't this the letter you wrote?

Jenna: Geez they didn't write it! Get it through your head!

T.V. F: and what is it that we're meant to have wrote…ugh written.

Melissa: nice…

Firmin: be quiet!

T.V. A: do not fear for miss. Daae the angel of music has her under his wing…make no attempt to see her again.

TV R: if you didn't write it who did?

Raoul: Oh look! There I am!

Everyone: -stares at Raoul-

Raoul: what?

Everyone: never mind..

T.V. Carlotta: Where is he?

TV F: ah welcome back

TV C: your precious patron where is he?

TV R: what is it now?

TV C: I have a letter! A letter which I rather resent!

TV F: and did you send it?

TV R: of course not!

Jenna: all you guys are truly a bunch of idiots!

Melissa: I can't believe that with all the stories of the phantom going around you would assume that it came from him and not from Raoul or the managers!

TV A: as if he would.

TV C/P: you didn't send it?

TV R: of course not!

TV C: you dare to tell me that this is not the letter you sent

TV R: and what is it that I meant to have sent. "Your days at the opera Populaire are numbered Christine Daae….

TV C: Christine Daae...

TV R…will be singing on your behalf tonight. Be prepared for a great misfortune should you attempt to take her place.

TV F/A: far to many notes for my taste and most of them about Christine, all we've heard since we came is Miss. Daae's name

-you all know this part blah, blah skip to the prima Donna scene start in the middle from….-

TV A/F: A prima diva happy to relieve a chorus girl whose gone and slept with the patron..

Erik: -shoots a look at Christine-

Christine: I swear I didn't!

TV A/F: Raoul and the soubrette entwined in loves duet although he may demur he must have been with her, we'll never get away with all this in a play but if its lovely sung and in a foreign tongue its just the sort of story audiences adore Infact a perfect opera. Prima Donna the world is at your feet a nation waits and how it hates to be cheated light up the stage with an age old report sing prima Donna…once more!

**A/N: um yea I guess I'll leave you there I know I haven't updated in a long time and for that I apologize and beg your forgiveness you see I had written it down on a note book and then lost the note book before I finished typing what I had written down and I forgot what I had written down then my friend (Katie) told me she wanted to be in it so that changed my original idea and so forth this…so I apologize truly I do! **

**Ok so what will happen? Will Katie wake up again? And if so will she faint…again and will Raoul go all crazy…again. Review and stay tuned and I promise I will update sooner! **


	18. The Party and Sponge Bob

_**A/N: ANOTHER new character will be added to this story…because I'm such a sucker and I cant say no to my friends when they begged me to be in it they are in it so yea…Read and Review! Tell me what'cha think! **_

Chap.18- the party and sponge bob

As we last left our crew they were watching the movie and it was up to the part of "Prima Donna", Katie, our new character, fainted…twice…because she saw Erik and not the bad way.

Katie: -wakes up…again…from her unconscious state-

Jenna: YaY! Katie's back!

Melissa: Woo!

Katie: what happened?

Jenna: you fainted because you saw Erik.

Katie: oh…ERIK!

Erik: shhh…Im trying to watch my life.

Melissa: hey it's like your whole life is flashing before your eyes Heh, Heh, Heh, Heh.

Erik: …right…

Melissa: cept not your WHOLE life cuz you're like what 30 something here and…

Jenna: Melissa shut up! were not gonna go through that again! –to erik- erik you're not old.

Melissa: compared to Christine he is! Ya know ever here that song, "I'm in love with a man nearly twice my age."

Jenna: Melissa…

Melissa: yes?

Jenna: NO TALKY!

Melissa: ok….

Erik: THAT'S what you have to do? Speak baby language to her and she'll shut up!

Jenna: yes…her mind does not comprehend what you say to her.

Melissa: HEY! I can so comprehend what he says to me!

Jenna: alright, alright just forget it and get back to the movie!

-They all get back to the movie and soon Jenna's mom calls and says that she will be going out for a few hours with her brothers.-

Jenna: awesome! We can have a party!

Erik: like a Masquarde?

Jenna: urm…sure if you wanna wear masks…

Firmin: oh no! we are not having another masquerade! The last one was a disaster!

Erik: oh why because I showed up.

Andre: no because…well because…oh well yes that is why.

Erik: thanks that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Raoul: like a teddy bear!

Erik: um sure.

Teddy: (from my other story) will you stop calling me teddy!

_Wrong story Theodore Edward Bear! Now go back into for always and forever! _

Teddy: oops…

Erik: who was that?

Jenna: no one of great Import…wow I really have to stop hanging around these 19th century people.

Katie: WOO! PARTY!

Jenna: lets get some music on! -Turns on radio and its really loud rock music.-

Erik: -covering his ears- AH! What in the world is that retched sound!

Jenna: -turns off music- sorry my Dad's music…-finds some good music and puts it on-

Melissa, Katie and Jenna all start dancing to the music and everyone else stares at them.

Firmin: you people have a strange way of dancing!

Katie: well all you people do are like slow dances that's boring!

Erik: it's not boring!

Jenna: no of course not, not boring at all.

-the music continues to play and soon the party gets really wild, Raoul has eaten too much ice-cream and is now sugar high and running around the house like an animal while Jenna chases him around trying to catch him which is surprisingly not easy. Firmin and Andre are covering their ears because being old guys they can not take sound that well. Erik is at the piano trying to drone out the sound of the loud music, with Christine singing along with the piano and Carlotta screeching along and Erik constantly stopping to yell at her to stop or a disaster beyond her imagination will occur. Madame Giry is just sitting there, because she's always like that boring calm one, and Melissa and Katie are dancing like hell-

-The door bell rings and no one hears it at first and it continues to be dinged until Firmin answers it.-

Firmin: what!

Boy: umm…hi who are you?

Firmin: who are you?

Boy: I asked first!

Firmin: ugh fine, I am Richard Firmin

Boy: Michael…is Jenna home?

Firmin: oh you're a friend of hers. Yes, yes she's here come in come in, she's a little detained at the moment though.

-Jenna comes running in on Raoul's back-

Raoul: wee! Im a horsy!

Jenna: this is fun!

-Jenna continues to ride around on Raoul-

Michael: ok what is going on here?

Firmin: there's a party! Unfortunately…

Michael: I can see that…

-they stand there for a few minutes-

Firmin: so are you just gonna stand there or join the party with the other wacko friends of Jenna's

Michael: -thinks- join the wackos! –Starts dancing and stuff-

Firmin: as I thought

-Raoul eventually gets tired…

Raoul: hey carrying a teen age girl on your back is not easy!

_Yeah, yeah…_-…and Jenna's fun is now ruined then she remembers something she saw on the computer.-

Jenna: Hey! I've got something to show you guys it's hilarious!

Everyone: ok

-they follow Jenna into the computer room and Jenna searches and then finds what she was looking for a cat standing up on two paws is dancing and music starts playing out of the speakers: "Cat I'm a kitty cat, and I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance. Cat I'm a kitty cat and I dance, dance, dance, and I dance, dance, dance." Melissa, Katie, Jenna and Michael start cracking up and the POTO cast just stares at it. "Cat I'm a kitty cat and I meow, meow, meow and I meow, meow, meow."-

Erik: not…going…to…ask.

Jenna: oh come on Erik! It's funny!

Firmin: that is not funny! That is just…just…disturbing!

-As if on cue 'Sponge Bob square pants' comes on and Patrick is saying "that's not disturbing this is disturbing… 'Hi sponge bob my name is PAT BACK!' SB: hey you're right that is disturbing!"

Jenna/Katie/Melissa/ Michael: ooo! Sponge Bob!

Everyone else: Sponge bob?

Katie: -starts quoting- where's the X the map said 10,000 paces east!

Jenna: east? I thought you said weast!

Katie: weast? What kind of compass are you reading boy?

Jenna: this one sir

Katie: that's west Patrick

Melissa/Katie/Michael/Jenna: -laugh-

Melissa: Is this the krusty Krab?

Jenna: no this is Patrick

Katie: is this the krusty Krab?

Jenna: No this is Patrick!

Michael: is this the krusty Krab?

Jenna: NO THIS IS PATRICK! I am not a krusty Krab

Katie: uhhh Patrick that's the name of the restaurant

Jenna: huh…oh! Fish paste!

Erik: wow…I'll tell you what wow.

Firmin: Is that guy supposed to be an idiot

Jenna/Melissa/Katie/Michael: yes!

Firmin: ah I see

Katie: they make a reference to Erik on one of the episodes!

Erik: what?

Katie: yes you see in one of the episodes Sponge bob has really bad breath but he doesn't know it and he thinks he's ugly and Patrick comes visiting him and finds him in a dark room, with a cloak on, and playing the organ. And when Patrick calls his name he turns around and has this mask on.

Erik: How dare they! How dare they…how do you say…

Jenna: make fun?

Erik: yes that's it… How dare they make fun of the phantom of the opera!

Michael: cuz they don't know you're real and in this time period and that is an old episode made a few years ago before you came here

Erik: oh be quiet…who are you?

Michael: Michael

Erik: how long have you been here?

Michael: about an hour

Erik: ok…you're not a Phangirl are you?

Everyone: …….

Erik: right stupid question.

**_A/N: HA HA! So Erik asked a stupid question…I actually did that to him the other night we were roleplaying and I asked you wanna be Christine or Erik? He responded: "hmm….well that's a really hard decision." Yea so I used personal experience with that one. And all these people (Michael, Jenna, Katie, and Melissa (sorry missa that you're last) are all real people and I do not own them! Lol! _**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own POTO, "the kitty cat dance", Spongebob or my friends, they only thing I do own is Jenna and again I'll tell you why at the end of the story! I'm gonna make you wait suckers! HAHAHHAHAHAHA….sorry im good…**_

_**REVIEW PLEASE! **_


	19. Marshall the rock

Chap: 19: Marshall…the rock

Jenna: A stupid question indeed. –Grabs Michael- does this look like a girl to you?

Erik: no

Michael: well I certainly hope I don't look like a girl

Jenna: don't worry you don't Michael

Katie: yes he does

Michael: well…how rude

Melissa: hey…where's Christine?

-Everyone looks around and cannot find Christine…they look in the den the movie is paused in the den. They check the bathroom…by knocking; they check the bedrooms and the basement. Christine is no where to be found.-

Jenna: where is that woman!

Christine: what woman?

Everyone: Christine!

Christine: what?

Melissa: where have you been?

Christine: well…the party was getting to nuts for me so I went out side and took a walk…did I forget to tell you?

Everyone: yes

Christine: oops

Jenna: Erik thought you left him

Erik: no I didn't!

Katie: really?

Erik: ok maybe for a moment…

Christine: Aww Erik I would never leave you!

Raoul: that's what you said to me! And you left me

Katie: you're a pregnant man!

Raoul: so…

Katie: that is not physically possible! Boys don't have the necessary parts!

Jenna: whoa too much info there Kate

Katie: he, he. But it's true!

Ad lib: yea, oh yea. Right. Uh huh

Melissa: so this just proves the point that Raoul is a girl! Right Raoul?

Raoul: right! Wait…what?

Erik: well that explains a lot…wait…if he just agreed to being a girl…and Christine was once in love with "him"…-looks at Christine-

Jenna: Erik Destler what are you implying!

Erik: I don't know; what am I implying…I was just saying Christine kissed a girl.

Christine: I did? EWWW!

Erik: I agree…wait how do you know my last name?

Jenna: because I know everything

Erik:-rolls eyes-

Christine: excuse me I need to wash my mouth out! –runs to the bathroom-

Raoul: I never said I was a girl!

Jenna: I do believe you did…missa said that you were a girl then asked you if she was right…you said she was

Raoul: but I didn't know that! I wasn't paying attention! It's not my fault! Im not a girl! Im not! –Starts having a hissy fit-

Jenna: shut up ya baby!

Raoul: -sniffle- I am not a baby…

Katie: but you're carrying one!

Everyone: -laughs-

Christine: -comes back into the room and sighs. Then goes over and slaps erik on the face- why didn't you tell me you were a girl!

All the girls and Michael: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Erik: -rubbing his cheek- damn girl you have a hard slap…and it wasn't me damnit! It's your pregnant fop over there! And plus we were joking

Christine: oh…my pregnant fop…-runs into the kitchen and gets a post-it note comes back and sticks it on Raoul's forehead it says 'my pregnant fop'-

All the girls and Michael: -still laughing-

Erik: -chuckles- I have to admit that was good Christine.

Christine: I was just claiming my property

Raoul: I am no one's property! –Tries to rip off post it…but fails-

Jenna: -whispers- except the aliens.

Everyone: -laughs-

Raoul: what's so funny?

Katie: your face!

All the girls and Michael: Ooooooo!

Jenna: hey Raoul does your face hurt?

Raoul: well a little but that's because of the post it note but other than that no not really. Why?

Jenna: because it's killing me!

All the girls and Michael: Ooooooo! Dis!

Raoul: I don't get it

Jenna: never mind…dumb fop

Melissa: ooo! Ooo! Erik! Say your line about Raoul!

Erik: what line?

Katie: you know the insolent boy…thing

Erik: oh…-in a booming voice- insolent boy you slave of fashion basking in christine's glory. Ignorant fool you brave young suitor sharing in my triumph.

Jenna/Melissa: Brava! Brava! Bravissima!

Melissa: Brava!

Jenna: magnifica!

Jenna/Melissa: stupenda! –laughs-

Andre: hey isn't that what I said…

Jenna: yes it is and it's funny!

Andre: really? Awesome! –to Firmin- she thinks im funny

Firmin: -rolls eyes-

Jenna: yes…but because you're so odd

Andre: she thinks im o…hey!

Melissa: hey is for horses!

Firmin: well technically miss Melissa…the hey he used is spelled H-E-Y and the hay that horses eat is spelled H-A-Y…so he was correct.

Melissa…ok sure fine whatever.

Jenna: psst…here's a tip monsieur Firmin...don't speak intelligently to her…she wont understand it.

Melissa: -sticks out tongue-

Michael: quite right, quite right.

Melissa: shut your noise you!

Michael: go away! Or I shall taunt you a second time-a. –Sniff-

Erik: is that Monty python again?

…_maybe…_

Erik: we told you to cut that out!

…_I'm sorry I couldn't resist._

Melissa: ni!

Erik: authoress!

_It wasn't me!_

Melissa: yes…sorry that one was me.

Jenna: oh! Oh! Katie remember that x-men picture of professor Xavier and he's raising his hand… 'That one was me.' (1)

Katie: oh yea! Our whole little story…-sigh- that was great

Erik: yeah you guys are scaring me im going to go away now…-starts to turn and run away but trips on something and falls to the ground-

Raoul: -gasp- oh my goodness! –Runs over to erik-

Erik…Raoul?

Raoul: -pushes erik aside picks up the rock that erik tripped over.- oh Marshall I thought I lost you! –Hugs rock-

Erik: -shakes head-

**_A/n: ok….thats about that…review please!_**

_**(1): yes…the story…here it goes: 'hello my name is Scott summers and im in love with my…saucy ledge! One time I made a fishy face jean didn't like it so she turned away. –farting noise- what was that? 'pic of prof. x' that one was me… Logan: ok one don't fart in the car especially when kitty's drivi…whoah momma!**_

_**TA DA!...and Kate I didn't have the pictures near me and I still remembered that!**_


	20. It's time for RHPS!

A/N: Hey! I'm back finally! I haven't been in a writing mood lately…but my friend everyday is asking me if I updated it. So im gonna write it. OKAY Mike…geez…lol. Just kidding!

Chapter 20: time for rocky horror!

Raoul: -continues to hug rock-

Jenna: and for a second I thought he actually cared about you.

Everyone: Really? –looks at her strange-

Jenna: oh come on! Erik thought it too.

Erik: …

Christine: you did?

Erik: No! of course not!

Melissa: yes you did! You questioned him as he ran over to you.

Erik: well you know what. –points a finger in her direction and doesn't say anything else and an ackward silence falls over the room-

-Jenna looks at melissa, Melissa looks at Katie, Katie looks at Jenna, Jenna looks at Mike, Mike looks at Firmin, Firmin looks at Andre, Andre looks at Carlotta, Carlotta looks at Raoul…Raoul is still having a moment with his rock so Carlotta looks at christine, Christine looks at Mme. Giry and Mme. Giry looks at Erik…and Erik looks at Melissa-

Erik: -crosses arms- no one asked you!

Melissa: ha! I win!

Jenna: no I win! Im the one that said it!

Melissa: but im the one who made Erik speechless and an awkward silence fall over the room.

Jenna: but im the one who brought up the whole subject!

Melissa: But im the one who….who made Erik speechless!

Jenna: you already said that.

Melissa: …so

Carlotta: Cat-a fight-a!

Katie: you should get your poodles in there.

Carlotta: -glares-

Katie: or are they too precious to you.

Carlotta: you shut up-a! Blonde lady.

Katie: oh no you didn't!

Carlotta: I do believe-a, I just did-a

Katie: bring it on cow lady, bring it on.

Carlotta: Cow lady!

Erik: …well this ought to be interesting…

Andre: indeed.

Mike: fight! Fight! Fight!

Madame Giry: do not cheer them on young man!

Mike: why? It's fun!

-Jenna and Melissa continue to argue and Carlotta and Katie are circling each other, glaring and Carlotta and Katie are saying nasty things about eachother-

Carlotta: you are-a short-a

Katie: well you are the worst singer in the world.

Carlotta: oh si, and dat is why they made me prima donna.

Katie: Because the managers are too blind to see that they have something better.

Carlotta: oh and what is that-a?

Katie: well…maybe a dying horse.

Carlotta: excuse-a me?

Katie: you're excused. Yes a dying horse would sing better than you do.

Carlotta: I take that as an insult!

Katie: you should!

-mean while-

Jenna: Well you wouldn't have even said that if I didn't bring up the topic!

Melissa: well you wouldn't have brought up the topic if erik didn't trip over a rock!

Jenna: well Erik wouldn't have tripped over a rock if Raoul would learn to keep his…love affairs handled.

Melissa: well Erik wouldn't have tripped over the rock if Raoul wasn't such a fop!

Jenna: wait…why are we argueing about this…we should be attacking Raoul.

Melissa: …good point!

-they both look at Raoul-

Raoul: oh no….-tries to run...but ends up being a waddle and Erik gets a kick out of this and falls onto the floor dying with laughter-

-Jenna and Melissa look at each other and smirk and call after Raoul)

Both: we're gonna get you Raoul! Keep running!

-Raoul panics and trys to run faster but fails and they all start laughing…even Katie and Carlotta stop fighting to laugh at the waddling Vicomte-

Katie: I found something worse than you

Carlotta: what-a?

Katie: him!

Jenna: you sure that's a him kate.

Firmin: oh not this again!

Jenna: sorry…I couldn't resist.

Andre: but he is pregnant…

Melissa: we've gone through this! He is pregnant with an alien baby! Somehow the alien got him pregnant

Katie: but he doesn't have the organs that are capable to carry a baby.

Madame Giry: young lady! How do you know all of these things?

Katie: umm…we learn it in school and plus people do worse things

Mike: yeah! Like the senior prank for our school this year was a giant penis on the field!

Madame Giry: oh my heavens!

Erik: say what now?

Jenna: its true I saw it with my own eyes!

Melissa: that's really gross…

Madame Giry: you poor child!

Katie: I took pictures!

Erik: you are a very perverted person!

Katie: thank you!

Erik: that's not supposed to be a complement…

Jenna: again with the pervert…Erik may I remind you that you stood behind someones mirror in her dressing room!

Erik….shut up

Madame Giry: Erik I am very disappointed with you!

Melissa: creepy perverted stalker!

Erik: wha…

Jenna: I am ashamed on you erik! She's 16 for goodness sake!

Firmin: you spied on her phantom! No wonder she was so terrified!

Andre: No wonder you fell in love with her!

Raoul: even I wouldn't do that!

Jenna: you're too dumb to do that!

Raoul: Hey!

Mike: ha ha Raoul is a dumbbutt!

Raoul: I am not! Stop making fun of me! You're so mean! –breaks down in tears-

Katie: oh no not another mood swing…

Raoul: excuse me…im going to go the bathroom and cry…-he runs out of the room-

_Hello my sweet characters…_

Melissa: oh no! you're back! What do you want now!

_Nothing…much_

-suddenly music starts to play and christine is looking at erik seductively and he is looking at her very oddly.-

Christine: -singing-I was feeling done in, couldn't win  
I'd only ever kissed before.  
I thought there's no use getting into heavy petting  
It only leads to trouble and seat wetting...

Erik: christine? Are you ok

Christine: now all I want to know, is how to go

I've tasted blood and I want more

Jenna/Katie/Carlotta: more, more, more

Christine: I'll put up no resistance, I want to stay the distance

I've got an itch to scratch I need assistance!

Toucha toucha toucha touch me! I wanna be dirty! Thrill me, chill me fulfill me, creature of the night.

Erik: -looks at chrisitne shocked.-

_He, he, he…_

-suddenly a poppier music comes on and Raoul comes in a corset (although not really fitting cuz hes pregnant and all) and a thong and tights.-

Raoul: -singing- Don't get strung out by the way that I look,  
Don't judge a book by its cover  
I'm not much of a man by the light of day,  
But by night I'm one hell of a lover

I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania. Ha ha!

Firmin: that is just…very disturbing!

Jenna: -mutters- really I thought you would like it

Firmin: what was that?

Jenna: nothing!

Raoul: -struts up to everybody and tries to look sexy-

I see you shiver with antici... pation!  
But maybe the rain isn't really to blame  
So I'll remove the cause, but not the symptom.

Madame: what the devil is going on here!

Christine: -still singing- Then if anything grows while you pose  
I'll oil you up and rub you down  
And that's just one small fraction of the main attraction  
You need a friendly hand and I need action...

-she is moving her hands around Eriks torso while doing this and he is looking at her like she is psycho…which she kind is-

Toucha toucha toucha touch me, I wanna be dirty  
Thrill me chill me fulfil me  
Creature of the night.

Erik: -suddenly grips christines shoulders and sings- the river was deep but I swam it!

Everyone else: Janet

Erik: the future is our so lets plan it

Everyone else: Janet

Erik: please don't tell me to can it

Everyone else: Janet

Erik: ive one thing to say and that's, damnit janet I love you!

_Oh hoo hoo hoooo am I having fun! _

Erik: the road was long but I ran it!

Everyone: janet

Erik: theres a fire in my heart and you fan it!

Everyone: Janet

Erik: Theres one fool for you and I am it

Everyone: Janet

Erik: ive one thing to say and that's damnit janet I love you!

Firmin: I thought her name was christine?

Andre: it is! They're being possessed again…I mean look at him! –points at Raoul who is still dressed as a sweet transvestite-

Raoul: -singing- im just a sweet transvestite from transsexual translyania!

Katie: I always thought you were from France?

Raoul: oh no, that's just a cover up. im really a –singing and does sexy move- sweet transvestite from…

Katie: ok I get it! It looks good on Tim Curry not you!

Melissa: Tim Curry! I know him! I think…

Jenna: yea he was King Arthur on Broadway's Spamalot

Melissa: ohhh!

Mike: -singing- im just a sweet transvestite from transsexual, Translyvania!

Katie: -looking disturbed-

Jenna: not you too!

Mike: what? Oh no! no, no, no, no…I just like that song

Katie: …ok anywhooo… -turns attention back to Raoul- So you're not a vicomte?

Raoul: truly I don't know anymore…but I know I am from Transexual Translvania and not from…_paris_.

Jenna: But Raoul is not even from Paris if he and Christine were child hood sweet hearts and Christine lived in Sweden that must mean Raoul lived in Sweden at the time too.

Raoul: oh it doensnt matter what country! All I know is im not from this world!

Melissa: you can say that again…

-suddenly there is a big pause in time. Everyone is frozen in time and a voice comes out of nowhere-

_**Ok so the authoress is now out of Rocky Horror things and life will go back to normal…or normaler.. **_

-time suddenly fastfowards with Christine being all sexual to erik, Raoul coming in Frank N. Furters costume and Erik singing "Damnit Janet." All goes back to…-

Mike: ha ha Raoul is a dumbbutt!

Raoul: I am not! Stop making fun of me! You're so mean! –breaks down in tears-

Katie: oh no not another mood swing…

Raoul: excuse me…im going to go the bathroom and cry…-he runs out of the room-

Melissa: he gets rather annoying

Jenna: yeah most definatly.

_**A/N: ha…ha…ha…my friend gave me the idea for doing rocky Horror. Im sorry I haven't updated sooner…hope you liked this chapter and review! **_


	21. The musical Guests

A/N: I am on a musical frenzy…I've got a request from Erik for President and I am going to take it.

Chapter 21: the musical guests!

Raoul: -comes back into the room after bawling his eyes out in the bathroom-

-suddenly there is a knock at the door-

Jenna: I'll get it! –does a dance thingy while going to the door opens the door.- yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss…sss.

Erik for President: Hi!

Jenna: Hi! Come in!

-EFP walks in with Jenna and they walk into the den and everybody turns their attention to the new girl.-

Erik: …is she ..a..

Jenna: yup!

Erik: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! –Makes crying noises and turns to Andre right next to him- they come here, they all come here. How do they find me?

Andre: -moves away from Erik-

EFP: look what I have! –Holds out DVD box-

Erik: NOOOO…wait what is it?

Jenna: the Producers! WOOT!

Efp: -grins and suddenly the box starts shaking and it floats into the air and a bright light comes from the box as three guys come out and land on the floor.-

Guy #1: oh geez what the hell just happened.

Guy #2: I don't know but this place is making me extremely nervous –takes out blue blanket and rubs it on his face-

Guy #3: Vat is goin on? I vas talkin vis my virds! And suddenly I am here!

Melissa: its Bialystock, Bloom and Liebkind!

Liebkind: How do you know our names?

Jenna: you are the producers! Well Leo and Max are you are just the writer of springtime for Hitler and Prisoners of Love.

Liebkind: how does she know all dis?

EFP: long story!

Bloom: who are all these people? I don't know them –continues to rub blankey on his face-

Bialystock: oh knock it off with that blanket! –takes blanket away from Bloom-

Bloom: -terror stricken- my blue blanket! Give me my blue blanket! AHHHHH! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! –grabs blanket from max-

Bialystock: how come I never learn?

Everyone in the room who doesn't know the producers: –is confused-

Liebkind: -looks around the room suspiciously. And then stops at erik- You –he points at him- Do ze hop clop!

Erik: do the who what?

Liebkind: -points to the two managers- and you two do it with him!

Andre/ Firmin: umm…

Liebkind: NOW!

-Andre and Firmin get up and so does Erik and they stand next to each other and start improvising-

Liebkind: no, no, no! Zats not how you do ze hop clop!

-Music starts-

Liebkind: vatch me! (Singing) Guten tag hop hop! Guten tag Clop clop! Ach du lieber und oh boy!

_And to work my magic…_

Erik: Guten tag clap clap! Guten slap slap! Ach du leieber vat a joy! Oh, Ve Essen und fressen und tanze and trinken Tanzen und trinken until ve get stinkin! Everybody!

Erik/Andre/Firmin: Guten Tag hop hop  
Guten Tag clop clop...

Erik: Guten Tag meine Liebe schatz So ve hop our hops Und ve clop our clops Und Ve drink our schnapps till ve plotz!

Bialystock: this seems awfully familiar…

Liebkind: -watching in happiness-

Erik: You must agree to the Siegfried Oath.

Andre/Firmin: Very well!

Erik: I solemnly svear... Andre/Firmin: I solemnly svear...

Erik: ...to obey the sacred Seigfried Oath... Andre/Firmin: ...to obey the sacred Seigfriend Oath...

Erik: ...und...

Firmin: ...und...

Andre: ...und...

Erik: ...never, never, never...

Andre/Firmin: ...never, never, never...

Erik: ...dishonor ze spirit und ze memory of Adolf Elizabeth Hitler!

Andre/Firmin: Dishonor the ... Elizabeth?

Bialystock: defiantly familiar.

Erik: Yes Elizabeth did I stutter?

Andre/Firmin: no…

Erik: Good!

Andre/Firmin: Adolf Elizabeth Hitler

_Ok that's enough…for now _

Erik: whoa…what just happened

Melissa: you sound good with a German accent

Erik: German accent? What are you talking about?

EFP: that was very entertaining!

Katie: lets hear a song that involves Erik and Christine!

_He, he, he you got it Katie. _

Erik: (singing) That face, that face  
That dangerous face  
I mustn't be unwise  
Those lips, that nose, those eyes  
Could lead to my demise  
That face, that face  
That marvelous face  
I never should begin  
Those cheeks, that neck, that chin  
Will surely do me in  
I must be smart  
And hide my heart  
If she's within a mile  
If I don't duck  
I'm out of luck  
She'd kill me with her smile  
That face, that face  
That fabulous face  
It's clear I must beware  
I'm certain if I fall in love  
I'm lost without a trace  
But it's worth it...  
For that face

Christine: dat face, dat face, dat lovable face…

Firmin: -cough cough-

Jenna- elbows him-

Christine: it melts my svedish heart!

Erik: im certain if I fall in love I am lost without a trace,

Christine/Erik: but it's worth it for that face!

_Time for more "love" songs…he he._

Andre: No one ever made me feel like someone, 'Till him. Life was really nothing but a glum one, 'Till him. My existence bordered on the tragic. Always timid never took a chance, then I felt his magic and my heart began to dance! I was always frightened fraught with worry till him, I was going nowhere in a hurry 'Till him. He filled up my empty life filled it to the brim, there could never ever be another one like him.

Firmin: No one ever really knew me, 'Till him. Everyone was always out to screw me, 'Till him

Jenna: -cough cough-

Melissa/Katie/EFP: -giggle-

Firmin: Never met a man I ever trusted, always dealt with shysters in the past. Now im well adjusted cuz I have a friend at last!

Carlotta: (singing) Aaaaaaaahh!

Firmin: Don't help me…Always playing singles never doubles 'Till him. Never had a pal to share my troubles 'Till him.

Andre: he filled up my empty life,

Firmin and Andre: filled it to the brim

Andre: there could never ever be another one….like…him.

Firmin and Andre: -Hugs tenderly-

Raoul:-joins in the hugging-

Firmin and Andre: Get off of us you fop

Raoul: -crying- I feel so alone

Everyone: You are you fop

Raoul: Im goin to Marshall, he will comfort me

Mike: …he's a rock…

Raoul: so…

….

Raoul: you people are mean! –Grabs Marshall and runs into the next room hugging the rock tightly-

Jenna: Dumb fop and his pet rock

Katie: it's not only his pet

Melissa: yea…it's his looooooover.

Mike: again…it's a rock

Raoul: -to the rock-Just touch me and it will make me feel better

Erik: you are a sick and twisted man

Katie: you nasty

Melissa: how would a rock do that?...

Jenna: it can't! It's a freaking rock! Raoul's just has no one else to go to!

Mike: what about those aliens that made him pregnant

Jenna: no, remember they kicked him out…he was annoying them.

Christine: Raoul stop doing that I thought you were better than that having a inanimate object try to touch you

Melissa: Chrissie, he was never better than that, you were just to blind to see it.

Erik: hey! Christine was not blind!

Jenna: oh…then tell me Erik…why did it take until Raoul got abducted by aliens that she turned to you.

Erik: Because…

Jenna: Becausseeeee..

Erik: …..

Jenna: any day now Erik…

Erik: -sighs- fine she was blind… I just didn't want to hear Christine being insulted.

Christine: Aww Erik! –Gives Erik Long hug-

Erik:-Thinking to himself- _ha ha Raoul, she's mine now. _

Raoul: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Jenna: oh shut up!

Raoul: meanie!

Katie: here you want your rock to touch you –walks over and takes Raoul's rock away from him-

Raoul: hey….

Katie: -chucks the rock at Raoul's head- there it touched you!

Raoul: Owie! That hurt! –Makes puppy face and tears are in eyes-

Mike: Well you would get hurt when you love Christine, love a rock and get pregnant but neither Christine nor the rock is the other parent.

Erik: Inconceivable! ((A/N: No pun intended ;-) ))

Katie: wow…Raoul is a whore…

Jenna: -laughs-

Melissa: wow that's great

-now the authoress at this point remembers Bialystock, Bloom, and Leibkind are still here.-

Bialystock: wow…and I thought my life was a bit extreme…

Liebkind: gah! Tell me, are you Jerman! (german)

Raoul: -sniffling- no…im Swedish…I think…

Liebkind: -to erik- are you jerman!

Erik: no im French

Liebkind: who iz Jerman!

Jenna: im part German

Mike: me too!

Liebkind: veally? Oh! Zat is vonderful!

Jenna: ok…

Liebkind: Zen you know ze "Haben Sie Gehürt das Deutsche Band?"

Jenna: umm…kinda…

Liebkind: den zing vith me!

Liebkind: Haben sie gehort das Deutsche Band

Jenna/Mike: Haben sie..gehort das…deutshche band…

Liebkind/Mike/Jenna: Mit a bang Mit a boom Mit a bing-bang bing-bang boom  
Aaah, haben sie gehort das Deutsche Band Mit a bang Mit a boo Mit a bing-bang bing-bang boom

Russian folksongs und French oo-la-la Can't compare with a German oom-pah-pah!

Ve're sayin'...Haben sie gehort das Deutsche Band Mit a zetz, mit a zap, mit a zing...

Polish polkas, they're stupid und they're rotten It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that Schweigen-reigen-schone-schutzen-schmutzen sauerbraten!

Liebkind: -to melissa who is now seated at the piano- Key change!

Liebkind/Mike/Jenna: Ve're sayin'...Haben sie gehort das Deutsche Band Mit a zetz, mit a zap, mit azing...it's ze only kind of musik Zat ve huns und our honeys Love to sing!

_**END SHOW! **_

_**A/N: a little abrupt ending I know but I didn't have any more ideas...but I do for the next chapter…Hehehe…no more musicals…for now :-D **_

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	22. Pirates of the 21st century

_**OK!! I'm back….finally….another guest today…probably wont be leaving for a while because…well you'll see and im completely obsessed as you can tell I have changed my penname….SORRY ERIK!!!!!!! –cries- im good….**_

**A/N: ok so last time we left off Jenna, Mike and Franz Liebkind were doing the "Haben Zie Gehurt Dasch Duetchaband or however you spell it….**

Katie: well that was interesting

Melissa: yea…

Jenna: that was fun!

Liebkind: good! Im glad you zought dat waz fun, because it iz fun!

-The box on the ground shakes and everybody looks at it-

Mike: it's possessed!

-the light comes out again and Bialystock and bloom start being sucked back in and Bloom pull out his blankey and rubs it against his face and then Liebkind starts to get pulled back-

Liebkind: good bye my Jerman Buddies! I vill Mizz you!

-Liebkind disappears and the box stops shaking and just lies there.-

Erik: and I thought my life was interesting before…

Jenna: you did?

Erik: well yea…with falling in love, and then losing my love and stuff…like…that…

Jenna: uh huh…

Erik: -shifty eyes-

Melissa:…right anywho

-Suddenly a light and a big boom comes from the computer room and everyone looks in that direction and stares as a pink swirly thing comes.-

Katie: what in the name of all that is holy….

Erik: you couldn't have just said what the hell or something?

Katie: no…I wanna be special!

Jenna: you already are

Katie: hey….

Melissa: stop arguing and watch the pink swirly thing!

-They all listen (for once) and watch the pink swirly thing and then all of a sudden five people come flying out and things go flying and object roll in front of them-

Jenna: rum…hat…sword…eye….it only means one thing

Katie: oh no…

Person #1: what the hell…-looks around-

Jenna: JACK SPARROW!!!

Jack Sparrow: CAPTAIN Jack Sp…-stops when Jenna attaches herself to his leg-Ummm…hello there love.

Jenna: he called me love –squeals-

Erik: Oh thank you sir! –Walks over to Jack and Jack looks confused- you are a lifesaver

Katie: which is ironic cuz he's a pirate

Jack: what did I do?

Erik: you helped me get her –points to Jenna who is hugging jacks leg- off of my back.

Will: well Jack for once a girl isn't slapping you.

Jack: ha ha very funny William

Elizabeth: where exactly are we?

Melissa: you are in the 21st century!

Elizabeth: the 21st century??!

Erik: that's what I said, I, like you, am from the past. 1870's to be exact.

Jenna: -drools on Jacks pant leg-

Jack: I don't know whether I should be flattered or disturbed.

Mike: She wants your banana.

Katie/Melissa: -stares-

Jack: -confused-

Firmin: I really hope he means the fruit.

Katie: I doubt he does…

Melissa: that is so wrong.

Jack: -looks down at Jenna still attached to his leg.- you're a little young for me love

Jenna: -doesn't hear anything that is going on around her-

Erik: this girl is more obsessed with him than she was with me.

Andre: do I hear a hint of jealousy in your voice

Erik: no! I am not jealous! I am just stating the obvious…she never held onto my leg…or drooled on me…or wanted…my…banana.

Christine: and you are disappointed in this….why?

Erik: Because I thought she loved me –pouts- at least as a crazed Phangirl…I felt loved even though she was crazy.

-Everyone looks for Jenna's reaction on Erik's sentimental confession but she doesn't do anything-

Jack: I'm sorry mate if I stole your bonnie lass; my first and only love is sea I must tell you though. (And of course Lizzie im a JE fan sorry for you WE fans)

Erik: oh no she's not my love, Christine is my love I just miss the attention from the crazed Phangirl.

Madame Giry: where is Christine?

-Christine is seen talking with Elizabeth in the corner-

Katie: wow never expected them to become friends so easily.

Raoul: -who is standing next to will- will you be my friend?

Will: -shifty eyes- Ummm…

Raoul: pleeeaaaaaaaaase.

Mike: -to will- ixnay on the riendsfay ithway hetway regnantpay opfay

Melissa: ….HUH?

Mike: don't be friends with the pregnant fop

Will: He's PREGNANT?

Jack: who's pregnant? Whoever it is I didn't do it!

Katie: no you didn't Captain Sparrow, aliens did they captured him and made him pregnant just like in SIMS 2 (which I don't own)

Jack: oh…

Ragetti: -looks around looking for his lost eye, goes up to Carlotta- have you see a wooden eye around here lassie?

Carlotta: lassie? Exusi! My name es Carlotta, and eww why would I want your eye!

Pintel: 'Es not askin if ye have it poppet E's askin if ye seen it.

Carlotta: why do you keep callin me dese names. My name es Carlotta!

Pintel: I don' care what yer bloody name is!

Ragetti: -looks for lost eye on couches and the piano- where de hell is it!

Meanwhile:

Raoul: So…will you be my friend?

Will: ….

Katie: its ok to say no Will, just say no he's a lonely fop anyway he can go to his rock.

Will: his rock?

Erik: yep, his rock his lover is a rock named Marshall.

Will: that is sad

Erik/Katie/Melissa: we know.

Jack: -to Raoul- you really need to get your self a girl mate.

Katie: I don't think that will happen anytime soon

Melissa: because 1) he's a fop 2) he's a PREGNANT fop 3) he loves a rock 4) he got raped by an alien 5) just look at him he's a weirdo.

Raoul: -on his knees hands folded together and puppy dog eyes- I want a friend, my life long friend left me for a masked freak…

Erik: watch it –fingers Punjab-

Raoul: …and he hates me, they hate me –points to Katie, Melissa and Jenna (still drooling on Jack's leg)- and all I ever wanted was a friend who would like me for me! –starts whimpering- oo! An eye! –picks up the eye and stares at it fascinated.

Ragetti: -coming out of nowhere- mine! –Takes his eye back and put it back in his eye socket-

Raoul: -pouts-

_Now for a glimpse at Christine and Elizabeth's conversation: _

Christine: So you're a pirate huh? Well that must be interesting, my life has been way too interesting. You see him –points to erik- he was my angel of music for almost 10 years then he revealed himself to me, only to learn he is obsessed with me?

Elizabeth: oh really how so??!

Christine: he has a manikin of me, he has dolls of me…

Elizabeth: whoa.

Christine: you're telling me, and do you know why he wears that mask?

Elizabeth:- shakes head-

Christine: he has a distortion but it doesn't matter to me, he, of course has very low self esteem and thought I hated him and lost his temper on me he has a very bad temper let me tell you…so he scared me away to him. –Points to Raoul who is now holding onto Wills pants leg-

Elizabeth: what in the world is he doing to will?

Christine: I wouldn't worry about it…he's in love with a rock.

Elizabeth: ok….

Christine: and then when he got abducted by aliens I realized my mistake and went back to Erik.

Erik: -hearing his name- huh?

Christine: nothing!

Elizabeth: wow…your life is complicated…that is my fiancé Will, and we always somehow get into a mess with Jack over there. –Points to jack who seems to have given up on getting Jenna off of his leg-

Christine: so you must choose between to men also?

Elizabeth: exactly…what? NO!!

Christine: -smirks-

Elizabeth: listen missy I do not have any feelings what so ever for Captain Jack Sparrow

Christine: uh huh

Elizabeth: I don't! he is a scallywag and a pirate, who only cares about himself, he's a drunk –she gets a dreamy look on her face- who deep inside is a good man…and although he's a smelly pirate he's a damn handsome one…

Christine: -looks at Liz with a smirk-

Elizabeth: -back to normal- did I just get a dreamy look on my face and acted like I loved Jack

Christine: -nods-

Elizabeth: bugger!

Will: alright! Ill be your friend!

Katie/Melissa/Mike/Erik/Jack: -shocked faces-

Jenna: -drool-

Raoul: really??!

Will: yes, we'll be secret friends…pen pals!...I'll write you! –walks away with Katie, Melissa, Mike, Erik and Jack (who is acting normal ignoring the teenage girl still attached to his leg)

Raoul: -does happy dance-

Will: I would have never gotten him off my back if I didn't do that!

Jack: Will, that's not like you…you're usually so…friendly

Will: hmph…well not to him…He's pregnant! He's a MAN!! A very girly man…..but a man none the less!!!

Everyone: we know!

Will: no need to get huphy.

Katie: -talking on her cell phone- yea im at Jenna's….yes it's…interesting…

Will: -approaches Katie- what's that –points to cell phone-

Katie: -to will- it's called a cell phone.

Will: -blank look-

Katie: -sigh- you talk to people through this –taps speaker- and the person on the other line can hear it.

Will: really? –Steals cell phone-

Katie: hey! …I wouldn't do that!

Will: Hello? –He says into the phone-

Person on line: who is this??

Will: Will Turner

Person on line: …..

Will: hello?

POL: -screams….really loud-

Will: -holds phone away from ear- what in bloody hell…-after POL stops screaming- what happened over there?

POL: you're Will Turner….the pirate.

Will: im a blacksmith actually…but you can call me a pirate

Jack: If he's a pirate then I'm the chief of a cannibal tribe

Katie: you were the chief of a cannibal tribe

Jack: ….shut up

Katie: Will! Give me the phone!

Will: no! This is an interesting device…and this girl seems to like me.

Katie: - like…love…whats the difference?

Will: …right.

POL: you're will turner….you mean like Orlando Bloom

Will: …Orlando Who?

Katie: -grabs phone- no that's not uh the REAL will turner we have like a great impersonator of him and we know you love him so we thought it would be cool……

Will: I was having fun!

Jack: oh stop it

POL: and I suppose you have someone who can impersonate Jack too.

Katie: ….yup! gotta go bye! -hangs up. sighs- Will! That was incredibly stupid!!

Will: hmmph

Raoul: -comes in dancing still and he goes up to Erik-

Erik: what do you want?

Raoul: -singing- don't cha wish your girlfriend was hott like me, don't cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me

Erik: no

Raoul: don't cha!

Erik: no

Raoul: -making "dos"-

Erik: oh God help me…

Raoul: -keeps singing that song-

_**I know kind of short…medium length but I didn't have any more ideas and something is better than nothing right? So REVIEW!!! It would make me happy…if not Raoul will beg to be YOUR friend! **_

_**-calls- oh Raoul…..**_


	23. The Confession

_**Well I only got a few reviews!!! Whats up with that?! Ok fine all the people that didn't review here you:**_

_**OH RAOUL! I've got a WHOLE bunch of friends for you!**_

_**Raoul: friends!! For me??? Oh yay!! Thank you!!! thank you! I love you all my new friends!!!!! **_

_**And there u have it there is a little reminder of raouls friend wanting in every chapter to get you to review. **_

…_**I KNOW you're out there.**_

_**Disclamaire: I do not own POTO, POTC or "Mrs. Bob's Cratchets Wild Christmas Binge." (although most of you will not understand I used a line from that play)**_

Raoul: -still singing- don't'cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me…

Erik: for God's sake SHUT UP!!!

Jack: aye, its bad enough I got a teenage girl stuck to me leg, which im not complain I like the attention it just gets annoying, I don't need that!!!

Will: -rubbing his head- This is the last possible way I ever expected to get a headache

Raoul: oh! Im giving you a headache…illstop! Do you want some advil or something!

Will: …..

Katie: his motherly instincts is kicking in

Raoul: Will, I'm serious. If you need anything, im on it.

Jack: You have some serious problems mate, maybe some rum will do ye good?

Raoul: what is rum?

Katie: OH NO! we do NOT need a drunk Raoul.

Melissa: Yes a Drunk Raoul would be VERY bad…he would be more stupid than usual.

Jack: I won' get him drunk…maybe just a little bit…please…

Katie: sorry Jack, I don't think Jenna has any rum in her house.

Jack: oh bugger.

Andre: Is this rum? –holding up a bottle of rum-

Firmin: Andre! Where on earth did you get that?

Andre: -shrugs- I found it

Jack: Yes! That's rum!! –runs, (or as fast as a man with a teenager attached to his leg could run) and grabs rum bottle from andre- Dear Sweet Rum…

Will: and you say Raoul has a problem

Jack: you're just jealous!

Will: of what?

Jack: …of… me.

Will: why would I be jealous of you?

Jack: because….I'm Captain Jack Sparrow!

Katie: great answer

Jack: its true!

Melissa: well we know that!

Jack: no one asked you…uh…Alyssa?

Melissa: HOW COME NO BODY KNOWS MY NAME!!!

Katie: I know you're name

Melissa: so…None of the important people know my name.

Katie: oh…thanks.

Melissa: I didn't mean it like that!!

Katie: well theres really only one meaning for that.

Melissa: what I meant WAS…

Elizabeth: ok…enough! Your name is Melissa!

Melissa: Yes! Somebody knows my name!!

Elizabeth: Jack.

Jack: yes love?

Elizabeth: her name is MELISSA got it? M-E-L-I-S-S-A!

Jack: -blank look- lizzie, you know I can't spell..

Elizabeth: -slaps forehead-

Jack: I'm a bloody pirate, we don't have pirate school where we go and learn to spell! It is not essential to us!

Elizabeth: -sigh- fine her name is MELISSA. Do you understand?

Jack: aye! i think…

Elizabeth: good. Whats her name?

Jack: -repeats in the same way liz said it before- MELISSA.

Elizabeth: -another sigh- well it's a start.

Melissa: is my name really that hard to remember…I mean it is a pretty common name these days.

Katie: well UNIMPORTANT people can remember it because they are not IMPORTANT to have IMPORTANT stuff to do, because they are so IMPORTANT that your name is not IMPORTANT enough for them to remember.

Andre: do you have a fascination with the word important?

Katie: -sigh-

Erik: you –points to Jack- and you –points to andre- should best keep your mouths shut.

Jack: you can't tell me what to do! I'm captain Jack Sparrow! And who are you? a guy in a mask!

Erik: -flames appear in eyes-

Jack: -a WTF look on his face-

Melissa: that was incredibly stupid Jack.

Jack: what?

Raoul: meep! –hides behind Will-

Will: -weirded out at the apparent fascination Raoul has of him-

Mike: hes going to attack you! with his mighty Punjab of doom! Muahahaha –evil laugh-

Everyone: -stares-

Katie: -whacks mike upside the head…with a FISH!-

Mike: Owww…

Firmin: where did you get a fish?

Katie: …I don't know…-throws fish, hitting Raoul on the head-

Raoul: AHHHHH!!!! I'm being attacked!!!

Will:…I rather be with Barbossa

Raoul: -runs around the room, getting louder as he gets closer to the den then softer as he goes away (much like those cartoons where you see them running and screaming then they disappear than reappear still screaming.)

Mike: ok….anyway! Umm…peeps I have a confession

Katie: I KNEW IT! Jenna you owe me fifty bucks!

Jenna: -drools-

Mike: …..

Katie: You're secretly a vampire who kills off his own kind and also works for a human company, and whose boss is a total bitch!

Mike: ok….

_No Katie…No Alucard for you. _

Katie: OH MAN!!

Mike: …no it has to do with Raoul's pregnancy.

Katie: I knew that too!!! You did it!! I knew there was something odd about you. And Jenna that's 10 more bucks!

Mike: it was not me!!! Although I kinda took part in it….but it wasn't me!!

Katie: uh huh sure slim shady

Mike: no it started out with this guy who goes by the name of Jean.

Melissa: isn't that a girls name?

Mike: yes but…not for this Jean…anyway… he…tried and succeded in raping me.

Katie: dude…not needed info…

Mike: -grins and continues anyway- but I got his seed, gave it to aliens and the aliens distribituted it over to Raoul.

Erik: wait, wait, wait so Raoul is pregnant with this guy named Jean's baby?

Mike: yep

Erik: that is even more disturbing than aliens.

Mike: -smirks-

Raoul: -hearing part of the conversation stops his running- so wait?? My baby is all human.

Mike: As of we know, yes.

Katie: -speechless-

Jack: you future people are too confusing…I wanna go back to the pearl!

Raoul: you –points to mike- you have to take me to this "jean."

Mike: uh…no…not a good idea.

Raoul: please…I wanna meet the father

Mike: I don't think he wants to meet you.

Raoul: I don't care! I want to meet him!

Mike: no! Raoul! No!

Raoul: God, you take a mans dream away as soon as it comes.

Jenna: that's Michael for you.

Everyone: -stares at Jenna-

Jenna: what?

Katie: you have been hanging onto Jack's leg for about a few hours now.

Jack: I think my leg has gone numb….and…wet….

Jenna: sorry about that Captain Sparrow, I just got excited.

Jack: good to know love…

Jenna: not like that!! Gosh, Jack Sparrow!

Jack: theres another meaning to that?

Jenna: -sigh- yes…you're Jack Sparrow I was happy to see you….to meet you.

Jack: Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow… can't forget the Captain love….it's essintal.

Jenna: uh huh…

Elizabeth: he does this all the time…im constantly calling him Captain Sparrow. I can't just call him Jack.

Jack: because I'm not just "Jack" Lizzie, im Captain Jack.

Will: yes, and yet you haven't a ship.

Jack: I have the pearl!

Will: which Barbossa has in his holds right now.

Jack: its still my ship!! I built it! I was captain of it first so there fore it is my ship!

Will: But Barbossa still has it.

Jack: The Black Pearl is mine ye Eunuch! Ye got that! MINE!

Melissa: Gosh Jack so selfish.

Jack: -frowns-

Elizabeth: I must admit you 21st century people are amusing.

Katie/Melissa/Jenna/Mike: Thank you

Jenna: Well we also like your people coughcoughespeciallydrunkenpirateswhohasamonkeynamedafterhimandiscompletelyinlovewithhisshipandthoughhedoesntwanttoadmititwithlizziealsocoughcough. (especially drunken pirates who has a monkey named after him and is completely in love with his ship and though he doesn't want to admit it with lizzie also.)

Everyone (except Elizabeth): -blink blink- WHAT?

Elizabeth: -blushes-

Will: why is Elizabeth embarrassed?

Jenna: well if you paid attention to what I was saying than you would know now wouldn't you?

Will: But you talked fast!

Jenna: not my fault you cant understand fast talk.

Will: Girls can understand fast talk! Do I look like a girl to you?

Jack: well at a certain angle…

Will: -glares-

Jack: -smirks- and anyway and I understood what she said. And I am not in love!! –he leaned over to jenna- ..yet…im just flirting.

Will: in love? With who?

Jack: none of your business!

Will: Well Captain Jack Sparrow is in love its kind of rare and I want to know with who.

Jack: well understand girl talk and you would have known.

Will: -thinks.- you mean Elizabeth?

Jack: -crosses arms- I hate smart people

Will: You're in love with Elizabeth!

Jack: I am not!

Jenna: -in sing song- yes you are

Jack: I am so bloody not!

Jenna: Keep telling your self that Jack

Jack: I am not in love with Lizzie!

Katie: oh yea I dare you to take out your compass and see where it points.

Jack: fine! –takes out his compass and opens it and closes it and looks around-

Katie: where did it point Sparrow?

Jack: no where

Melissa: Jack…

Jack: it wasn't lizzie… -shifty eyes-

Jenna –gives a look-

Jack: ok fine it was Lizzie.

Will: you're in love with my girl?

Jack: I'm not in love with her!

Mike: yea he just desires her the most

Will: that sounds even more wrong that being in love with her

Elizabeth: alright alright! Everybody stop I will determine this know. Jack?

Jack: yes love

Elizabeth: Jack do you love me?

Jack: course not a pirate only loves his ship

Jenna: and his girl

Jack: Shut the bloody hell up!


	24. Andre: Gone Mad

_**Wow I got more reviews than last chapter! Thanks peeps now I am going to update faster!!! See when ppl review I update faster its that simple! –gasp-**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Phantom of the opera or Scrubs which I got Erik's rant from also a few lines from Jack. **_

Jenna/Katie/Melissa/Mike: Jack and Elizabeth sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love than comes marriage then comes the one in the baby carriage.

Jack: -falls off couch at the last two parts- Baby carriage! No, no, no Jack Sparrow is not a baby person.

Katie: Relax Jack it's just a song.

Jack: a song about me and Lizzie having a baby!

Melissa: you could use that song for anything like…Erik and Christine sitting in a tree and blah blah blah

Jack: you only got to the sitting in the tree part!

Jenna: ugh Jack…

Jack: what? You gave me and Lizzie the whole song but gave the real couple only the sitting in the tree part!

Jenna: -gives jack rum- now shut up

Jack: -grumble grumble- fine

Melissa: Hey I gotta joke!

Everybody: What?

Melissa: ok ok ready, why does Firmin love to sing the 'F-U-N' song with Andre?

Katie/Mike/Jenna: ….-starts cracking up-

Firmin: what is the 'F-U-N' song?

Katie: it's a huge joke on sponge bob but you really have to think perversely to get the joke Missa's making.

Andre: well sing it!

Jenna/Mike/Katie/Melissa: ok!... 'F is for friends who do stuff together'.

Mike: wink wink nudge nudge

Jenna/Mike/Katie/Melissa: 'U is for U and Me!'

Mike: a nod is as good as a wink to a blind bat

Jenna/Katie/Melissa: -getting agitated at mike- 'N is for anywhere and anytime at all'

Mike: like on holidays…with snaps.

Jenna/Katie/Melissa: -with gritted teeth- 'down here in the deep blue sea'

Andre: I don't get it.

Melissa: well of course you wouldn't

Andre: what is that supposed to mean?

Melissa: I don't know….let me think…

Andre: well hurry up will you I need to know!

Melissa: geez…it means you are as dumb as a post man!

Firmin: but….posts don't have brains.

Katie: exactly

Firmin: ok…

Jenna: ok let's sing the second verse see if he gets it

Katie: 'F is for frockling through all the flowers'

Melissa: 'U is for ukulele' '

Jenna: 'N is for nose picking'

Mike: -interrupting once again- you can pick your friends, you can pick your nose but you can not pick your friends nose! Ha I got it! See Bethany! **_(A/N: sorry that's a huge joke between me, mike, and my friend Bethany (who, if this story goes according to plan, you might meet later) _**

Katie: -about to slap Michael- 'sharing gum'

Jenna: 'and sand licking'

Melissa: -pushes Andre and Firmin together- 'down here with my best buddy'

Erik: hey…aren't all those things you mentioned what normal couples do?

Christine: -eyes light up-

Erik: no I am not frolicking through flowers.

Christine: -opens mouth to say something-

Erik: or picking your nose

Christine: humph

Jack: good call mate

Erik: thank you

Christine: I thought you loved me!

Erik: I do Christine, very much. But I am a phantom who has lived in a basement for years that I do not even know do I look like a guy who would frolic through flowers?

Jenna: I think I would be mentally scarred if I saw Erik frolic through flowers

Christine: but its fun

Jack: its not just him dear Ummm….

Melissa: Christine

Jack: Christine! Right…I knew that, no man would be caught dead frolicking through flowers.

Elizabeth: oh don't be silly Jack, when we were children Will and I used to frolick through the flowers all the time!

Jack: -cocks an eyebrow-

Will: -sinks down in his seat- Elizabeth…

Elizabeth: what? It's not bad Will

Jack: no…she's right. –Cough- girly man

Will: I was a child Sparrow! Who was good friends with a girl…oh and did I happen to mention I was falling in love with her around that point?

Jack: I was a child at one point too Turner and I didn't frolic through flowers!

Will: then what, pray tell, did you do?

Jack: I sat home and played with dolls

Everyone: -stifles laughter-

Jack: they were home made! And I didn't actually 'play' with them like a girl child would do I had adventures of what I would be as a captain when I grew older and look at that I am a captain…but then again…I'm sure William has the urge to just frolic through flowers every so often right Will?

Will: -glares-

Melissa: anyway, back to the whole 'F-U-N' thing with Andre and Firmin

Andre: yea I still don't get that

Jenna: ok think about what Erik said before about 'all that stuff is what normal couples do.'

Firmin: we're not gay!

Andre: oh dear are they starting that up again

Firmin: They've never let it go Andre

Andre: you need to let things go people I mean come on, I tell you once I will tell you twice

Firmin: we'll tell you one hundred times

Andre: we are not gay! We're just two friends who have been friends for a long time…ok like this Melissa and Jenna

Melissa/Jenna: yeah?

Andre: are you two gay?

Jenna Melissa: No!

Andre: ok then its settled…just because two members of the same gender hang out with each other a lot doesn't mean they are homosexual!

Katie: damn that was a lot of big words….

Melissa: I'm surprised he knew that many big words.

Andre: I have had enough of you people!! I have a brain, I am the manager of an opera house, and I am not GAY!! The next person who calls me that or insults me in anyway, is going to regret it.

-The whole room goes silent…Andre scanning the room violently for any sign of any talking-

Andre: nothing? That's what I thought.

Jenna: you can think?

Andre: -turns around and smoke comes out of his ears…literally-

Mike: -grabs a pail of water that randomly appeared out of nowhere and throws it on Andre-

Andre: -turns to mike- WHAT THE HELL!!!

Mike: you had smoke coming out of your ears…I didn't want you to catch on fire.

Andre: -was about to yell some more but stopped himself- oh well thank you that was very kind –turns back to Jenna- now for you!!

Jenna: meep!

Andre: you brought us into this damn century and I am sick of all your damned 21st century insults!!!

Melissa: if we called you an imbecile would you still be mad at us? Cuz that's a 19th century insult.

Andre: -thinks- no I would not.

Jenna: you have got to be kidding me!!!

Andre: does this look like a joking face to you –points to his face which has a scowl, but since he was angry and since mike threw water at him his hair is frizzy AND wet-

Jenna: -stares and then starts cracking up-

Andre: ugh! That is it! –He attacks Jenna and pins her to the ground, wrestling with her-

Jack: ooo! A show! –Sits down on the couch and watches intently-

Will/Elizabeth: JACK!

Jack: what?

Will: ugh! –He tries to get Andre off of Jenna but it doesn't work to well, Andre is pumped with adrenaline and is stronger than usual- Will someone help me!

Erik: -groans and grabs Andre's arm-

Will: -grabs the other-

-They both take Andre and pull him off Jenna and hold him back tightly while he struggles against them-

Katie: Firmin will you control your boyfriend!

Andre: -growls with an intense ferocity like a lion and throws will across the couch and pushed Erik into the piano and like the hulk, tears off his shirt, which makes a really loud tearing noise, and stares at Katie with an intense glare-

Firmin: Woo!!

Everyone: -stares-

Firmin: uh….i didn't say that…nope…Heh, Heh

Everyone: ok –turns attention back to Andre and Katie-

Katie: oh bring it on ya pansy!

Andre: -charges at Katie like a bull-

Katie: -grabs hold of Andre's arm flips him over her so he lands on his back with a thud then she puts her foot on his chest and presses down so he stays down- Damn…never knew I could do that. –She pulled Andre up and pushed him outside the door and yelled-Spend a little time out there to cool off –she slams the door and locks it and walks back in wiping her hands together-

Jenna: -laying on the ground with her finger up in the air, and was speaking with a dazed, drunk sound,- to which I must say….ow

Melissa: are you alright?

Will: -getting up from where he was on the couch- Does she look alright to you?

Melissa: well she's been in a similar position.

Will: -cocks an eyebrow-

Melissa: oh yea, i once dropped a metal shovel on her head.

Elizabeth/Will: you what?!!

Jack: -starts laughing-

Elizabeth: Jack! Shut up!

Jack: I'm sorry luv but that is so funny.

Elizabeth: would you like me to hit you over the head with a shovel?

Jack: no…but I'd like to hit you with my shovel

Elizabeth: -shudders- Jack…just…-shudders again-

Jack: come on you know you want a piece of this Georgous pirate.

Elizabeth: -makes gagging noises- in your dreams jack.

Jack: yes...it is

Elizabeth: you are a sick man Jack Sparrow.

Jack: I try

Elizabeth: -rolls her eyes and turns her attention back to Jenna, who Will has now gotten able to sit up-

Jenna: what happened here?

Melissa: we were insulting Andre and he got a little mad

Christine: a little? The guy was worse than Erik

Erik: -glares-

Christine: -innocently- I love you my angel.

Erik: -grumbles-

Raoul: she used to love me.

Everyone: will you just shut up!!

Raoul: You are so mean!

Erik: Raoul…do you know how much you annoy me?

Raoul: -on the verge of tears- no

Erik: The answer is a lot. Should I list the reasons why? Well I don't see why not…-takes a big breath and says all in one breath.- its your hair, your nose, your chinless face, you always need a hug, not to mention all the manly appletinis that you chug, that you think I am your friend just continues to perplex. And, oh my God, please stop telling me when you have nerdy sex!

Raoul: but I never told you when I had nerdy sex…

Erik: I still don't want to know about it.

Raoul: -sadly- ok… -sees a butterfly out the window- ooo a butterfly!!

Erik: -sighs and continues his rant- see now, foppy, that's the thing you do that's drives me up a tree, cause now matter how I rant at you, you never let me be! So I'm stuck with your daydreaming, your wish to be my son, why I have no idea, it makes me suicidal and im not the only one. No im not the only one. –Points to the room who waves at Raoul-

Raoul: I never said I wanted to be your son!

Erik: but you thought it!

Raoul: ….what are you psychic or something?!!

Erik: no but I am…the phantom of the opera. –Super hero music plays in the background-

Jenna: Mervin!

Mervin: sorry –turns off stereo-

Mike: who is that?

Jenna: that is Mervin, he's my sound effect man, and he made the sound ripping shirt when Andre tore off his shirt.

Mike: that's creepy

Jenna: -nods- yep…wait why?

Mike: I don't know….i just felt like saying that.

Jenna: …right.

-Andre crashes up against the window and growls through the window.

Erik: I have had enough of this!! –he takes out his lasso and hangs it near the window to show Andre. He pointed to it then at Andre then ran a finger across his neck signaling if he didn't shut up that he would die.-

-Andre made a face but got off the window and sat on the curb-

Firmin: you know what I think..

Katie: No Firmin I don't cuz I'm not a mind reader!!

Firmin: -narrows eyes- that is not what I meant!!! I think that this damn century is making my...i mean…Andre insane!

Jenna: could be, could be…you actually never know…this century is insane.

Mike: this is true.

Katie: SHUT UP! No one asked you to speak

Mike: I don't need to be tol..

Katie: YES YOU DO!

Mike: No I…

Katie: YES YOU DO!

Mike: No..

Katie: YES!

Mike: -sigh-

Katie: SHUT UP!

Mike: I just sighed!

Katie: well you're not allowed to sigh!! –Kicks him in the shin-

Mike: OW! What is your problem?

Katie: You are

Jenna: -steps in between them- Part fools! You know not what you do!

Melissa: oh please don't say it is the authoress taking over again.

Jenna: no that was me I always wanted to say that –sniggers-

Melissa: -rolls eyes-

_**A/N: Well there you have it I apologize for the long wait I got caught up with school work and such and the drama production really limited me considering I got home at 8 at night, had to eat and do HW. But now im back so hopefully I won't take as long. **_

_**Sword pen: BTW your request will be in either the next chapter or the chapter after that im not quite certain. **_


	25. Shut up, I can win this!

_**A/N: a quick update for you guys!! **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Phantom of the opera, or any other movies that I happen to mention in this story!!!! **_

"_**Shut up, I can win this!" **_

Melissa: -about Andre- how long do you think he'll be out there?

Katie: I don't know…maybe until he gets frostbite it is like 20 degrees out there.

Mike: Cool!

Katie: -glares-

Mike: -glares back-

Jenna: alright you two before one of you has to join Andre out there!

Mike: She started it

Jenna: Hey!

Mike: she did…

Jenna: Michael how old are you?

Mike: …15…

Jenna: THEN STOP ACTING LIKE YOUR 5! GOSH!

Mike: -sticks tongue out-

Jenna: stop

Mike: fine

Raoul: hey guys!

Everyone: oh geez

Raoul: That light thing is back!

Melissa: …what light thing?

Raoul: -points- that light thing.

-Sure enough there is a swirly light that appeared in Jenna's living room-

Jack: does this mean we're going home!

Jenna: no it means more people are coming.

Erik: great

-suddenly three people fly out. A young man with raven black hair, a young woman with red hair and an older man with long, brownish hair.-

Young Man: Wha…where am I?

Young woman: Christian?

Young Man or Christian: Satine?!

Young Woman or Satine: Christian!

-they run over to each other and hug and kiss and stuff.-

Older man: What's going on? –Rubs head sees Christian and Satine- Hey! What's the damn writer doing back here and why is Satine here and….where the hell am i?

Jenna: -to Katie- ew…it's the duke.

Katie: -to Jenna- why the hell did he come?

Jenna: -to Katie- well why did Raoul come?

Katie: -to Jenna- that's true. maybe we can get them to be friends!

Jenna: -to Katie- Yea!

Melissa: -to Jenna- who is that guy, uh Christian, he's hot!

Jenna: -to Melissa- He's from the movie Moulin Rouge, just like Satine, and –cringes- the duke

The Duke: -glares at Christian and Satine- WARNER, get over here! I need you to kill that boy!!

-no one responds-

The Duke: Warner?

Jenna: Sorry Dukey, Warner is not here to kill Christian so you're screwed! HA!

Mike: He, he…dukey…

Katie: -slaps forehead-

The Duke: I am a duke I can have you arrested!

Katie: Sorry dude, you are a duke from the late 19th century and this is the early 21st century not to mention we're in America not France.

The Duke: but…but…She's mine!!

-Christian and Satine by this time are done "reacquainting" if you know what I mean… and stare at the duke-

Jenna: No…She's Christian's

The Duke: That penniless writer doesn't have anything to give her!

Satine: He can give me his love and that is worth _everything. _

The Duke: Love? Real love is when…

Jenna: shut up!!

The Duke: I beg your pardon?

Jenna: don't you dare give me that bull about "Real love is a lifetime of security…love is riches…" NO! Love is a bond between two people, Real love is when the person is constantly on your mind and you forgive them for all their wrongs, you love them despite their flaws and after a few kisses you don't get tired. Real love is what Christian and Satine share. You, Duke, are nothing but a perverted pig…and what you said about "once Christian has satisfied his lust he will leave her…" no! that is what you will do!! So just screw off Duke and leave Christian and Satine alone!!!

Everyone: -shocked-

Jack: The lass has got a temper…

Erik: indeed she does…

Jenna: I apologize for my outburst…but people like the Duke piss me off.

Christian and Satine: Thank you for that

Jenna: no problem really

Christian: I really appreciate it

Satine: we both do

Jenna: I didn't mind it at all

Katie: Although…

Jenna: what?

Katie: You could sing a song for us…you know as a thank you.

Jenna: Katie!

Christian: -laughs- no, no, that's perfectly fine. I don't mind, it's the least I could do. –Clears throat-

_Never knew I could feel like this,_

_Like I've never seen the sky before,_

_Want to vanish inside your kiss,_

_Everyday I'm loving you more and more,_

_Listen to my heart,_

_Can you hear it sing? _

_Telling me to give you everything,_

_Seasons may change,_

_Winter to spring,_

_But I love you until the end of time._

Every girl in the room: -sighs dreamily and collapse at Christian's feet. Christian stared at them with a confused expression, (for Moulin Rouge fans think the "Your Song" scene)

Erik: what the hell is this?

Jack: he has a good voice mate; you can only expect that from girls.

Erik: but I used to be the one that made girls fall at my feet with my voice!!

Will: is someone jealous?

Erik: No!!

Jack: I think you are

Erik: I am not!!! Just because my angel is swooning at the feet of a younger, talented….eh…YOU SIR!

Christian: -looks up- huh?

Erik: I challenge you to a contest

Christian: what kind of contest?

Erik: a singing contest

Christian: oh sir I couldn't….really…

Erik: I insist!

Christian: I'm really not the competitive sort

Erik: but you have such a wonderful voice I just want to put it to the test

Christian: I don't know

Satine: do it Christian

Christian: well alright… what do you want me to do?

Erik: -smirks- good. Alright. Stand there –points to a spot on the floor-

Christian: -walks warily over there and the room grows dark and a spot light suddenly shines on him- uh…..

Erik: just sing monsieur

Christian: Well alright… here goes…

_My Gift is my song,_

_And this one's for you,_

_And you can tell everybody,_

_This is your song,_

_It may be quite simple but,_

_Now that it's done,_

_Hope you don't mind, _

_I hope you don't mind,_

_That I put down in words, _

_How wonderful life is, _

_Now you're in the world._

_Sat on the roof, and I kicked off the moss,_

_Well some of these verses well they-they've got me quite cross_

_But the sun's been kind,_

_While I wrote this song,_

_It's for people like you that, _

_Keep it turned on,_

_So excuse me forgetting,_

_But these things I do,_

_You see I've forgotten,_

_If they're green or they're blue,_

_Anyway, the thing is,_

_What I really mean_

_Yours are the sweetest eyes,_

_I've ever seen._

_And you can tell everybody this is your song,_

_It may be quite simple but, now that it's done_

_Hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind_

_That I put down in words,_

_How wonderful life is now you're in the world_

_I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind!_

_That I put down in words, how wonderful life is, _

_Now you're in the world!!! _

Girls: SQUEEE

Erik: -speechless-

Jack: -to Erik- don't know how you're gonna beat that.

Erik: Shut up! I can win this!

Christian: -grinning.- thank you. I didn't know I was that good.

Satine: -running up and hugging him- of course you are Christian, you could have played the Sitar Player yourself if you weren't so self conscious.

Christian: -smiles- ok so I believe it is your turn? –points to erik-

Erik: uh…yea…-walks up to where Christian was just standing- ok umm…so here it goes…

_No one would listen,_

_No one but her,_

_Heard as the outcast hears_

_Shamed into solitude,_

_Shunned by the multitude,_

_I learned to listen,_

_In my dark my heart heard music,_

_I longed to teach the world,_

_Rise up and reach the world _

_No one would listen,_

_I alone could hear the music_

_Then at last, a voice in the gloom_

_Seemed to cry, I hear you,_

_I hear your fears,_

_Your torment and your tears._

_She saw my loneliness, _

_Shared in my emptiness,_

_No one would listen,_

_No one but her,_

_Heard as the outcast hears._

_No one would listen,_

_No one but her,_

_Heard as the outcast hears. _

Girls: -sniffle and cry-

Christine: Erik –sob- that –sob- was –sob, sob- beautiful –sobs some more-

Erik: thank you my angel.

Jenna: -hugs erik- you poor, unfortunate soul.

Erik: how many times do I have to tell you to stop hugging me.

Jenna: I'm sorry…that was just beautiful!

Erik: so…does that mean I win?

Melissa: well I don't know about that…you and Christian both have beautiful voices…

-Time "freezes" for a moment-

Random Announcer: -walked into the room- it would appear that monsieur Erik and Monsieur Christian have come to a draw.

Jenna: HEY! Who are you and what are you doing in my house?

Random announcer: uh…well you see I…-in head- 'how am I going to explain this one…'

Jenna: -crosses arms-

Random Announcer: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

-everything goes black and cuts to random announcer being chased down the block by everyone. Erik is swinging his Punjab im the air, Jenna has a tazer, Katie has a pitchfork, Mike has a laser gun with a razor blade attachment, Jack has a broken rum bottle, Will has his sword as does Elizabeth, Firmin has a torch and Raoul and the Duke…well that's self explanatory.-

Random Announcer: This is why you don't support domestic violence!

-a pitchfork flies past his head- OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_**A/N: a special thanks to Bethany for giving me the idea of the random announcer actually coming into the house when time was not "frozen" and then being chased by an angry mob with totally random weapons! YAY for Bethany! **_

_**If you have never seen Moulin Rouge, (SHAME ON YOU!) There will be a video posted of Christian singing "Your Song." Like he does in this chapter….for all the girls…it's SEXY! Lol…if of course you like Ewan Mcgregor…**_


	26. YOU'RE THE FATHER!

_**A/N: Thank you for your kind reviews: **_

_**Redflower Fox: Thanks! I'm glad you are liking it! And yes the house is getting a tad full but Jenna does have a big house so it's all good. )**_

* * *

_**Chapter: 26: "YOU'RE THE FATHER!!!"

* * *

**_

-After everybody chased the random announcer back to his studio, and after they tried to get in through every possible way, (which led to Will ripping his pants and then Katie, Jenna and Melissa taunting him with "I see London, I see France, I see William's underpants….") they all retreated back to Jenna's house where a sudden snow storm hit and Andre is still sitting on the curb, freezing his ass off…Ha, ha.-

Firmin: -feeling bad for Andre- why can't we let him in?

Katie: he needs to learn his lesson! He can not get away with attacking us.

Firmin: don't you think he had enough punishment…I mean for God's sakes he's blue!

Jenna: yes…but its not from the cold weather. –Holds up a blue paint can-

Andre: Damnit!

Katie: ooooohhh! You've been owned!

Everyone who is not the 21st century: HUH?

Katie: -sigh- he was found out…ugh…these 19th century people are wearing me out…

Erik: well if you would stop talking in such a different fashion than us maybe we wouldn't wear you out.

Katie: why can't you just learn to talk 21st century!

Erik: why can't _you_ learn to speak 19th century!

Katie: because you always look towards the future not the past! So you should learn future talk since you're in the future!! Everyone on this planet in this time period right now will be talking 21st century because –gasp- we're in the 21st century! So…GET USED TO IT!

Erik: make me!!

Katie: -looks at Jenna- are you ready?

Jenna: Damn straight!

Katie: word!

Jenna: yo!

Katie: Chillin' like a gangstar!

Jenna: Fo' Shizzle

Katie: my nizzle! Dawg!

Jenna: Homie G

Katie: Hellz yea boy!

Jenna: Ye-ah, son.

Katie: GuUuUuUuUuUrl! All up in my grill!

Jenna: it's all good!

Katie: 'cha.

Erik: -is now on the ground twitching-

Will: That's pathetic…really…

Jack: No….that's pathetic –points to Will's underwear that has little bunnies on it-

Will: -covers the hole in his pants- I ran out of plain white, So sue me!

Elizabeth: He actually has a whole drawer full of underwear that is exactly like that.

Will: Elizabeth!

Elizabeth: sorry. –Grins-

Will: -grumble, grumble-

Melissa: Can we get inside, it's freezing!

Jenna: sure.

-Everyone starts heading inside-

Christine: wait! Erik is still in the snow!

-Everyone turns to see Erik still twitching in the snow.-

Jenna: ok someone grab him by his cloak and drag him in.

Jack: I'll do it! –Walks over to Erik grabs his cloak and dragged him through the snow and into the house.- there! –Throws Erik on the dog bed-

Elizabeth: oh that's nice Jack just throw him on that hair covered blanket!

Jack: -shrugs- I got him out of the snow didn't I?

Elizabeth: -sighs- yes Jack you did.

Jack: What more do you want from me woman? –Pause- Well you don't have to say it out loud if you don't want to –smirks-

Elizabeth: Jack Sparrow! –Slaps his face-

Jack: Don't think I deserved that…

Elizabeth: Yes you did! You must get the notion out of your head that I want to do things with you because I do not!

Jack: Keep telling yourself that love, you'll come to your senses eventually.

Elizabeth: disgusting pig!

Christian: what strange, twisted, time have we come into?

Jenna: You have come into America, but more importantly, New York, in the year 2007. It is no 1899.

Christian: I can see that. You have pirates running around.

Melissa: oh no, they, like you, are from another "time" as is Erik, -points to Erik still twitching on the hairy bed-, Christine, Raoul, Firmin and Andre and other characters who just seemed to vanish from this story.

Christian: how interesting…this could be something to write about when I get home…adventures in another dimension….

Satine: Oh, speaking of writing, Christian did you keep your promise?

Christian: …not yet. But I was going to! I swear I was!

Satine: Hm…

Christian: I was! I wasn't…in the mood…

Satine: alright, I understand.

Jack: You should treat me like that

Elizabeth: I don't love you Jack! Get over it!

Jack: Three stages love

Elizabeth: what?

Jack: There are three stages of a crush, Lovey

Elizabeth: I do not love you!

Jack: Denial…

Elizabeth: Jack Sparrow, Cut it out or I will hurt you!!!

Jack: Anger…

Elizabeth: I am not discussing this further!!!

Jack: well acceptance will come soon enough

Elizabeth: humph!!

Will: Leave her alone, Jack! It's up to her to decide who she is going to love

Elizabeth: Yes, thank you Will.

Will: besides…she would choose me over you any day

Jack: Oh and why is that?

Will: you're a pirate

Jack: So are you, or did you forget that you were the son of Bootstrap Bill Turner?

Will: ….fine. Just because I am a pirate by blood doesn't mean I act like one! I am a blacksmith in Port Royal and that is it!

Jack: Whatever you say…-cough- pirate

Will: -glares-

-The argument goes on until they all hear a bang on the glass door-

Jenna: what the hell?

-they all turn to see Andre plastered up against the door, whimpering and scratching at the door-

Firmin- goes over to the door and pulls Andre in before anyone has time to protest- Andre! What happened, why are you acting like a maniac?

Andre: He…he…H…He's going to rape me!!!

Katie: who is?

Andre: The guy out there! –Points to door-

-Everyone to sees some kid standing at Jenna's doorway with this weird look in his eyes-

Katie: Holy hell!

Melissa: who is he?

Mike: it's….Jean

Melissa: oh so THAT'S Jean.

Jenna: yep

Melissa: he looks weird

Jenna: it's JEAN!

Melissa: ok geez

-Erik suddenly recovers and hops to his feet-

Erik: alright, nobody say anything about what just happened or I'll kill you.

Katie: nice threat there Erik, classic.

Erik: shut up

Jenna: we all forgot about that Erik because we now have THAT. –Points to Jean-

Erik: well what is THAT? –Points to Jean-

Jenna: well, THAT –points to Jean- is Jean

Erik: Jean? As in the Jean who made Raoul?...

Jenna: yep….that Jean

Erik: excuse me. –walks outside-

-Everyone looks outside and sees Erik shaking Jean's hand, saying something, smiling and then walking back inside-

Melissa: what did you say to him?

Erik: I thanked him, deeply and sincerely, he is the one who made my life worth living….besides Christine of course

Jenna: -laughing- well I'm sure that confused the hell out of him

Jean: it as sure as hell did

Everyone: -screams-

Jenna: you just can't walk into my house like that

Jean: -smirks and ignores her- Miiiike!

Mike: -hides behind Jenna-

Jenna: again Mike! What kind of man are you to hide behind a girl, seriously!

Mike: one who is scared of him –points to Jean-

Raoul: -who finally realized who "Jean" was in relation to him- JEAN!

Jean: -looks at Raoul weird- Ok, who the hell is that and how the hell does he know my name?

Raoul: I'm the…-everyone covers Raoul's mouth-

Katie: He's psychic….o0o0o0o0o

Jean: right…I'm sure he is…-realizing something- hey wait…what's with him?

Melissa: he's uh…he's uh…he's…

Satine: -whispering to Christian- you're the writer come up with something!

Christian: I don't know anything that has to do with medical things! This kid might be smart in the ways of science.

Satine: Well come up with something anyway!

Christian: -thinking quick- he ate too much!

Satine: -slaps her forehead-

Jean: He…ATE too much?

Christian: Yes, you see, he has a particular disorder and when he eats too much, his belly pops out and looks like he's pregnant…it should go away in just a few hours.

Jean: damn! I was hoping I could see the first pregnant man! That would be flippin' sweet!

Satine: well that was quick thinking

Christian: well I came up with the plot of Spectacular, Spectacular just off the top of my head.

Satine: Yes, and that's why I love you.

Jack: Ok, can I go throw up now?

Elizabeth: -slaps his arm- stop it! Their in love let them be.

Jean: O.K. and I thought you two –points to Jenna and Katie- were weird in school, but outside of school you hang out with movie character wanna-be's? I swear I'm going to need counseling.

Raoul: -throws everybody off him- LIARS! They are all LIARS!!

Jenna: No, Raoul No!

Raoul: I do not have a disorder!!

Erik: Yes you do, it's called Fop syndrome

Raoul: Shut UP! I am one of the first pregnant men!

Jean: That's awesome and all but now I think I'll leave.

Raoul: NO!!! I got captured by aliens you see, and they gave me a fertilized egg, which Mike here gave to them and which YOU gave to MIKE.

Jean: -stops and slowly turns around- What the hell are you talking about?

Raoul: You raped Mike, Mike gave the aliens your seed and then the aliens gave that to me!!! I am the first pregnant man and you are the father!

Jean: …….

Everyone: ……

Jenna: -slaps forehead-


	27. Of Arguements and Goodbye's

_Last Time In Back To The Past: _

_Raoul: You raped Mike, Mike gave the aliens your seed and then the aliens gave that to me!!! I am the first pregnant man and you are the father! _

_Jean: ……._

_Everyone: ……_

_Jenna: -slaps forehead- _

**AND NOW!!!!**

-Everyone was silent for a few minutes. No one really had anything to say. There was nothing to say. Then finally Jean broke the dead silence by bursting out into hysterical laughter-

Jean: ok, ok, this is all a joke right? I know, I can be a real pain in the ass sometimes, especially to you three –points to Jenna, Mike and Katie- and this is just revenge for you all…I mean, seriously, there is no way that something like that could happen.

Jenna: Right! Right! You are so right. –Puts an arm around his shoulder- yes, you really are a pain in the ass and you figured us out sooner than we thought. But after all you are a senior so you are smarter than us sophomores. We figured that since you were here, we would pull a little stunt…ya know we were hoping for it to go longer but you can't always have what you want.

Jean: -looks at Jenna- …get off me

Jenna: yes sir –walks away and stands next to Katie-

Raoul: Again! Lies! Everything I just said is true!

Melissa: No it's not!

Raoul: Yes it is! 1) I do so recall being captured by aliens and being impregnated! 2) I also recall mike confessing to us about Jean and 3) well I have no 3) BUT I do know that Jean is the father.

Jean: -still laughing but more hesitantly- he's kidding right? He's in on it too…he's like that guy said…he ate too much.

Christian: -nods- Yes…terrible problem…no cure

Raoul: Shut up! Authoress I need some help here

_Sorry no can do fop boy…I only help the non-annoying people_

Katie: -to jean- why are you freaking out about this? Didn't you say you wanted to see one of the first pregnant men?

Jean: Okay, here's the deal with this. I am eighteen years old. I am going off to college next year. I am not ready to have a child and even if I was I would like to have it with a woman not some cheap attempt at a male. I find it disturbing that I am going to be a father and HE is going to be the mother. No this is way too complicated. I don't believe you. I need counseling.

Bethany: hey guys!

Jenna: Bethany?? Where did you come from?

Bethany: seriously Jenna, we just learned that in Bio

Jenna: that is not what I meant! How did you get here?

Bethany: I don't know….i just seemed to appear here….it was weird

Erik: great…more of Jenna's wacky friends.

Bethany: shush! –Hits him over the head with a random text book-

Erik: ow! What the hell?

Mike: HA!

Bethany: -hits mike over the head with another random text book-

Mike: damn

Jean: Peter Griffin, don't hit Augustus…that's my job.

Bethany: Jean? What are you doing here?

Jean: being highly disturbed…and I was about to leave

Raoul: NOOOO!!!!! –Attaches himself to Jean's legs-

Jean: Holy…gets the HELL OFF!

Raoul: You can't leave me here alone. I need you.

Jean: if someone helps me I will leave them alone for the rest of the year

-Katie, Jenna, Mike and Bethany all fight to get to Jean first-

Will: this is going to take awhile

Jack: I've had enough of this century….I'd rather be on Davey Jones' ship, or I'd rather give Will to save me butt

Will: -glares- been there, done that.

Elizabeth: I knew it! –Goes to slap jack in the face-

Jack: -catches her wrist- ah! I've learned, don't try with me Lizzie, you won't get anywhere.

Elizabeth: let go of me

Jack: not until you admit that you love me

Elizabeth: I won't admit it because there's nothing to admit! Did you forget that I was supposed to marry Will before you sent him off to save yourself?

Jack: …and before you fell for this devilishly handsome pirate

Elizabeth: -narrows eyes- let go of me Jack Sparrow or else

Jack: or else what?

-They start arguing-

-Katie, Bethany, Jenna, and Mike are still fighting to get to Jean.-

-Raoul is still attached at Jean's ankles while he is trying to escape out the front door-

Christian: I can't believe we're stuck here

Satine: this life is crazier than the Moulin Rouge

The Duke: -to Christian- if I had a gun, you'd be dead right now

Christian: that's comforting.

The Duke: you deserve it, you stole Satine away from me

Christian: you stole her away from me! I don't care what anyone says, you may get the deeds to the Moulin Rouge but you cannot buy a person.

The Duke: well I can

Christian: No, you can't!

The Duke: Satine belonged to Zidler…

Christian: Satine doesn't belong to anybody or anything!

The Duke: …I bought the deeds from Zidler…

Christian: You manipulative little selfish rat

The Duke: …and therefore I now own Satine!

Christian: do you have the deeds on you?

The Duke: no…I gave them back once Satine died

Christian: what?

The Duke: I…gave them…back….

Christian: -grins- and therefore she doesn't belong to you anymore.

Satine: Yes, and even if I did belong to someone, I would belong to Christian

The Duke: That's not fair!!

-They continue to argue-

Elizabeth: let me go!

Jack: never!

Katie: -touches Jean's shoulder- HA! I win!

Jenna: -pushes down Katie and kicks Raoul in the head….Raoul is un-fazed- well now we know he has rocks in his head.

Mike: -tackles down Jenna. Pulls Raoul by his feet but Raoul just grabs harder onto Jean's ankles-

Bethany: -hits Raoul over the head with the random text book-

Christine: I am glad we got over our problems

Erik: Yep

Christine: this is really annoying

Erik: indeed

Christine: Well at least we figured the mystery of Raoul's baby.

Erik: I am seriously shuddering at the sight of a little Raoul.

Christine: well actually, technically, the baby is not really Raoul's. The baby is his –points to jean- and Raoul is just the carrier.

Erik: well that's some relief

Christine: Yes

Andre: -shaking in the corner with Firming standing next to him- I don't wanna be another Raoul, I don't wanna be another Raoul, I don't wanna be another Raoul, I don't wanna be another Raoul.

Firmin: Andre, calm down! You are not going to become like the vicomte.

Andre: that guy scares me!

Firmin: I think the same goes for everybody.

Raoul: -finally collapses.-

Jean: oh THANK GOD! Aug…I mean Mike. You're off the hook and so are you Bethany.

Katie and Jenna: what about us?

Jean: -to Katie- you just touched my shoulder not much help there. –To Jenna- you attempted to help me so I can ease off you a bit.

Jenna: sweet!

Jean: oh and –gives Jenna sixteen punches on the arm- happy birthday.

Jenna: gee thanks

Jean: -smirks- See ya! –Runs out the door like a maniac-

Katie: you suck

Jenna: hehe

-Back with Elizabeth and Jack-

Jack: say it

Elizabeth: No

Jack: come on

Elizabeth: No

Jack: you know you love me Lizzie

Elizabeth: never!

Jack: I'm not going to let go until you say you love me

Elizabeth: well you'll be holding on for a while then Sparrow. And what's it to you? Do you love me?

Jack: ….perhaps….but you'll never know until you tell me first

Elizabeth: you do don't you?

Jack: -smirks-

Elizabeth: Jack Sparrow actually fell for someone?

Jack: I am not saying anything

Elizabeth: uhhh!

-Switch to the Moulin Rouge cast-

The Duke: - to Satine- so you can belong to him not to me?

Satine: it's a different type of belonging. The way you want me is by force. With Christian it's a mutual thing. I belong to him and he belongs to me. It's a love belonging.

Christian: Like soul mates

Satine: exactly. Like soul mates. The way I belong to Christian is not by any contract. If I wanted to go, not like I ever would, Christian would let me go. He wouldn't try to rape me because I have feeling for someone else.

Christian: you don't do you?

Satine: No one could ever replace you Christian; I am just trying to make a point.

Christian: alright.

Satine: you can't own women just because they're beautiful. Here's some advice, just try to act more kind and less controlling. Who knows you may find yourself actually falling for a beautiful woman and not just for her looks but for her personality.

Christian: exactly.

The Duke: No! I won't! You two will never be rid of me!

Christian and Satine: -sigh-

Andre: -still crying in the corner.-

Firmin: does anybody want to help me with this?

-No response-

Firmin: or not

-the room is loud and full of arguments. Everyone is in their own little separate arguments.-

Jack: Now you want to know don't you? You want to know if Captain Sparrow actually has feelings. All you have to do is admit it.

Elizabeth: -muttered- alright

Jack: -shocked- what?

Elizabeth: I said ALRIGHT!

-Everyone stops and looks at them-

Jack: -let's go of Elizabeth's wrist-

Elizabeth: -rubs her wrist- I might have some feelings for you.

Will: Elizabeth?

Elizabeth: I'm sorry Will, being around him so much, even though he's full of himself theres something about him that attracted me to him.

Jack: well this is awkward.

Elizabeth: You don't have to say anything if you don't want to, I know a pirate doesn't like to talk about his feelings.

Jack: -rubs the back of his neck- uh right.

-Suddenly the light appears-

Erik: oh great whose coming now?

Katie: I don't think anybody…look the spirals are spinning in the opposite direction.

Jenna: wait so what does that mean?

Katie: somebody is going home.

Jack: well I did say I would tell you…

Will: -starts being drawn toward the light- uh Elizabeth? Jack?

Elizabeth: -raises eyebrows-

-They are both so into what's going on between them that they don't notice that they are being drawn toward the light-

Jack: I guess, if I must be honest, the truth is Lizzie…-he started fading off as they disappeared into the light- is that I…-Jack got cut off when the light got smaller and then faded into nothing-

Jenna: oh come on! Jack was just about to say it!! Damn time!

Mike: They're gone?

Jenna: -Nods- yep they're gone.

Katie: Well…the house does seem much quieter.

Jenna: yep

Melissa: I'll miss them

Jenna and Katie: Me too –sigh-

_**A/n: So…the Pirate cast is gone now. So do you know what that means? Yes…I do think that it means the story is coming to an end. Don't worry though, there will be some more chapters because the Moulin Rouge cast has to go home too. And then the POTO Cast has to leave…and there might be a twist at the end of the story. Just stay tuned! **_

_**AA/N: for anyone who is reading my Moulin Rouge fic please pardon the wait. I haven't been feeling well and I have had major writers block I have 4 pages written of chapter seven and I am trying to write more! But it's just not coming to me, so just hold tight! Please don't give up one me!! **_


	28. It's a TOUPEE!

_**A/N: This is a very interesting yet funny chapter. The Duke gets a new friend that soon gets….well you'll see. And there is a surprising secret too!!! This chapter wouldn't have been out for a while if it hadn't been for Bethany (Yes the one in the story) who helped me write it and contributed most of the funny jokes that our dearly beloved characters (except maybe Raoul and the Duke) say. So enjoy and Review!! And although 'Back To The Past' only has a few more chapters in the making there will be a sequel with all the same great characters you know and love!! **_

_**So now I proudly presents….**_

"_**It's a TOUPEE?!!" **_

Jenna: So…what do we do now that the Pirates cast is gone and Jean is gone?

Raoul: -awakening from his unconscious state- WHY!!! I was so close and I wanted him here! –Starts to cry-

Katie: Grow up you baby!

Raoul: No!! –Still crying-

Melissa: Erik? A little help?

Erik: -takes out Punjab- Raoul…

Raoul: NO! Please don't kill me! Don't you people understand that all I want is someone to support me! It's not fair! The only person that might have helped me and you all scared him off! I hate you all! –Goes and locks himself in the other room-

Jenna: Perhaps we are too mean to him…

Everyone: -is silent and pondering what Jenna said-

Everyone: NAH!

Jenna: Well, I mean come on guys, He's pregnant, he's going through a rough time we should cut him some slack.

Katie: Who are you and what have you done with Jenna?

Melissa: Yea!

Jenna: Well Jenna is still here but you all should know that Jenna has compassion for all living creatures.

Mike: why is Jenna talking in third person?

Jenna: Because Jenna wants to!

Mike: ok

Erik: Why should we cut him some slack? I mean look at him!

Jenna: well that's why we should cut him slack.

Katie: snap out of it –slaps Jenna in the back of the head-

Jenna: OW! What the hell Katie?

Katie: do you still think we should cut Raoul slack?

Jenna: eww no! That's stupid!

Melissa: -relieved- thank god, we have her back!

Everyone: WOO!

Bethany: Ok, now that Raoul is in the other room and Jean is gone…..LET'S PARTAY!!!

Everyone else: YEA!!

Jenna: I've got cookies!!

Katie: Sweet!

Jenna: -brings out a tray of all sorts of cookies-

Katie: -grabs an oatmeal raison cookie- Yum! The Christian cookie!

Christian: the WHAT cookie?

Katie: oh yea…you're here….uhhh….

Jenna: You see…like those people over there –points to POTO cast- you and Satine and The smelly Duke….

The Duke: I'm not smelly!

Bethany: Yes you are! Now shut up! –Hits him over the head with text book-

Mike: Where'd ya get a text book? School is over…

Bethany: it's a secret……-hits him over the head with a text book-

Mike: humph

Jenna: Are you people quite done?

Bethany/Mike: Yes.

Jenna: Good

Bethany: for now

Jenna: -sigh- ANYWAY!! Like I was saying you two…three rather…are in a movie called 'Moulin Rouge!'

The Duke: Well of course they made a movie about me!

Katie: …. No…just no

Jenna: And….every girl who has seen the movie is kinda obsessed with Christian.

Christian: me?

Katie: yes you.

Jenna: And so one day I gave Katie an oatmeal raison cookie and she said that it was 'soft and delicious like Christian'

Christian: ….me?

Katie: Jenna, you're not supposed to tell him that! GOSH. Don't you think that would be just a little awkward? Only Satine can say he's soft and delicious!

Erik: …..-twitch- THAT'S too much information.

Satine and Christian: -stand there awkwardly-

The Duke: The Penniless writer has a cookie named after him! I want a cookie! Tell me what cookie am i?

Bethany: I'm sorry but there are no cookies that can match your personality.

The Duke: -gets the wrong meaning- Say thanks! See somebody likes me

Bethany: that wasn't a compliment.

The Duke: oh…I WANT A COOKIE NAMED AFTER ME!!!

Katie: No cookie for you!

The Duke: -bouncing up and down like a five year old- I want a cookie! I want a cookie! I want a cookie!

Jenna: Take a damn cookie! –Throws a cookie at his head-

The Duke: -rubs his head- that's not what I mean! But thank you…-looks at it and takes a bite.- mmm….you're soft and delicious…I shall name you fluffy! And you will be my fluffy.

Bethany: ok….

Jenna: GREAT! Go and have a special moment with fluffy in the other room with Raoul who is also having a tender moment with Marshall. Go, go don't let us disturb you.

The Duke: -grins- come on fluffy! –opens the door and Raoul is still crying- Oh cheer up Raoul! We're going to have fun with our inanimate objects! This is fluffy.

Raoul: -stops crying and stares at fluffy.-

The Duke: hehehehe –closes the door-

Katie: well that was odd.

Satine: Here let me try that cookie, I'm sure, as Katie has mentioned that I'm the only who can really decide if this cookie is a Christian cookie.

Christian: Satine!

Satine: What? They already know don't they? –takes a 'Christian' cookie and eats it.-

Jenna: Well?

Satine: hmm…well…I must agree with Katie on this one. The cookie is named well.

Katie: do I know how to name cookies or what?

The Duke: -from the other room- NOOOOOOO!!!!!!! HE ATE FLUFFY!!!

-the door swings open and Raoul comes running out with half of 'fluffy' in his hands. The duke chases after him and Raoul hides in the corner and shoves the rest of 'fluffy' in his mouth.-

The Duke: -gasps- How DARE you eat fluffy!! –Grabs Marshall- give me that!

Raoul: -eyes go wide and teary- M…M…Marshall! Give me back my Marshall!!

Everyone: …..

The Duke: No! You're just as bad as the writer.

Satine: He has a name you know!

The Duke: he doesn't deserve a name!

Jenna: you don't deserve a name….which is precisely why you don't have one.

The Duke: I have a name….it's…it's….OH NO! I DON'T have a name! –falls to the floor in the fetal position and hugs marshall-

Raoul: Give me my ROCK! –attacks the Duke by going for his weakest point. His hair.-

Everyone: -shocked-

Raoul: -now staring at the Duke's full head of hair in his hand in confusion- what the hell?

The Duke: MY HAIR!!

Katie: it's…a wig?

The Duke: It's a Toupee!

Jenna: which is a fancy name for a wig.

The Duke: -tearfully- shut up! and give it back to me!!

Raoul: not until you give me Marshall!

The Duke: it's just a rock man!

Raoul: you went crazy when I ate your fluffy!

The Duke: -sniff. Sniff- FLUFFY!!! –stands up- give me my hair!

Raoul: Give me my rock!

The Duke: Hair!

Raoul: Rock!

The Duke: Hair!

Raoul: ROCK!

The Duke: HA..

Bethany: SHUT UP!!!

The Duke: …ir.

Bethany: Now both of you give me Marshall and you give me The Duke's hair.

Both: -grumble and hand over the objects-

Bethany: Thank you. –Throws them out the window- FETCH!

The Duke and Raoul: Heeeeey!

-Outside-

-The wig or "toupee" and Marshall hit some kid in the head.-

Random kid: what the hell?

The Duke: -now outside- you! –points to the kid- give me my HAIR!

Random kid: um…ok. –tosses the hair over his shoulder and it lands in a pile of leaves-

The Duke: NO! now it's all DIRTY!!! –runs over and digs it out-

Bethany: it was always dirty! That's why I threw it out the window!

The Duke: that's not fair! I don't like you!

Bethany: Yes well my affections for you aren't too high either

The Duke: I want you to clean it!

Bethany: excuse me?

The Duke: I want you to clean it!

Bethany: No!! That would take days

The Duke: -gasps- fine! Then…I'll run away and find someone who appreciates me!

Bethany: ok bye bye!

Melissa: ok, well good luck, no one will want to take in an ugly bald guy with a dirty wig

The Duke: not a wig!!

Jenna: yes, yes, we know it's a toupee.

The Duke: right!

Jenna: -cough- wig

Raoul: -looking around desperately for Marshall- where is he? Hey you! have you seen Marshall?

Random kid: Marshall?

Raoul: He's about this high and this wide and he has the most adorable little grayish color and he's a great listener.

Erik: it's a rock.

Raoul: -nods- but a very good listening rock

Melissa: It's a nice paperweight

Raoul: Its not a paper weight it's a rock!

Melissa: You're impossible.

Raoul: Yes I know, Marshall is the only who gets me.

Katie: the sad truth

Jenna: that poor rock

Raoul: yes it is sad!

Random kid: dude…did you just make fun of yourself?

Raoul: I don't know…did I?

Everyone: Yea…ya did.

Raoul: damn

Random kid: I'm outta here.

Raoul: WAIT! Did you see Marshall?

Random kid: I didn't see your stupid rock now leave me alone! Idiot…

Raoul: I am no idiot...or am i? –Turns to everyone- am I?

Everyone: YES!!!

Raoul: humph. Hey there's Marshall!!! –runs over and picks up a rock and hugs it-

Melissa: I don't think that's…

Jenna: Shut up!! He's quiet!

Raoul: wait…this isn't Marshall!! –Throws rock on the ground and sits on the grass and pouts-

Jenna: well so much for quiet!


	29. Erik's Anger Management

_**A/N: Finally an update!! YAY!!! But what is not yay….is that this is the last chapter of this story! Ready, group: AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! **_

_**Please Read the bottom authors note for more information about it. So here we go!! **_

**Chapter 29: Erik's Anger Management**

Raoul: -Still sitting on the ground pouting-

Katie: It's just a rock man

Raoul: It's not just a rock!! He was my friend!!

The Duke: Well you ATE my friend

Everyone: Shut up about fluffy!!!

The Duke: Alright geez. –puts his 'toupee' back on and fixes it so its nicer looking-

Jenna: It's still dirty…

The Duke: Leave me alone!! –Pauses- Hey look a rock! –Picks up rock-

Raoul: That's marshall!!! –Starts running toward the Duke-

The Duke: No! It's mine now! Finders keepers!

Raoul: -pouts- M..M…Marshall! Give me him back you..you…you ROCKKNAPPER!

-Tackles Duke-

The Duke: Ahhh!!! –runs away holding Marshall.-

Raoul: Gimmeeeeee!!!

The Duke: eeep! –runs and hides behind Erik-

Erik: Get the hell away from me!

Raoul: -Tarzan yell-

Everyone: Wow….just…wow

Bethany: What a loser.

Jenna: Makes Jean seem smart.

Katie: indeed.

Mike: Jean!? Where's Jean! NOOOOO!! –Runs away- not again!!! –Crashes into a tree-

Christian: Isn't anyone going to help him?

Jenna: nope, he's fine like that.

Bethany: Something like that happens everyday…you get used to it after a while…its not a big deal.

Christian: ok…

Raoul: -chasing the Duke around Erik- Give me Marshall!

The Duke: NO!

Erik: Stop it you idiotic, half-witted, senseless, thick-headed, illogical, ludicrous, deranged, mentally incompetent, unzipped, eccentric, inappropriate, dense, hebetudinous, pointless, imbecilic, gone ape, puerile, MORONS!

Katie: Damn…Didn't know you knew that many adjectives for that meaning.

Erik: well I've had time to practice…

Everyone: …right…

Raoul: -stops chasing The Duke- Aw! Erik I didn't know you cared!! –Hugs Erik-

Erik: -horrified look on his face- Get OFF ME!!!! –Throws Raoul to the ground- Do Not touch me!!! Ever again! –Shudders-

Jenna and Bethany: -laughing hysterically-

Erik: I don't see what's so funny!

Bethany: -in between laughs- of course you wouldn't.

Erik: I do not appreciate being laughed at!!

Bethany: I don't care…I'll laugh all I want. –Approaches Erik and gets all up in his face.-

-Laughs really loud and kinda fake-

Erik: -glares at Bethany-

Bethany: -glares back-

Erik: You!...-is about to yell but gets hit in the head with something hard- -turns to look behind him-

Bethany: Katie you owe me five bucks, I got Erik to almost yell at me!

Katie: -grumbles- damn

Erik: -picks up the rock that hit him in the head- who threw this at me?

-The Duke and Raoul point at each other with a scared look on their faces-

Erik: -growls- Fine! Then you both will be dead! –takes out Punjab and swings it in there air-

The Duke and Raoul: AHHHHHH!!! –Hugs each other and then both break off in a run down the street while Erik runs after them-

Melissa: You mean that's all we had to do…come on!!!

Mike: -waking up- what? What happened? Where'd all the cookies go?

Jenna: of course the first thing on your mind is food.

Katie: we ate them! HA!

Mike: you suck…I want cookies.

Bethany: then go make some!

Mike: No!

Bethany: Why not you're taking a cooking class

Everyone: -stares-

Bethany: -shrugs- he is

Mike: I don't care I'm lazy.

Bethany: Then don't ask for cookies.

Mike: meh

Bethany: Jenna….hand me your text book!

Mike: NO! I'll be good!

Bethany: I knew that would work.

Mike: why is it so quiet?

Melissa: Well, The Duke or Raoul hit Erik in the head with Marshall and now he's chasing them around the neighborhood with his lasso….the neighbors must be so confused.

Jenna: Not if they live here.

Melissa: right…I forgot….

Jenna: -shakes head-

-After a few moments Erik comes back….alone-

Jenna: uh…Erik?...where's Raoul and The Duke?

Katie: Yea…where'd ya hide the bodies?

Erik: I didn't kill them…unfortunately….They ran up a tree and hid there like the pansies they are.

Everyone: Ooooohhh….ok.

Christine: not that I'm not happy they're gone but…its kinda boring now….what are we going to do?

Jenna: well lets go back inside…we do have to finish watching the movie.

Everyone: oh yea….

Christian and Satine: What movie?

Melissa: The movie… 'The Phantom of the opera' we were watching it before all this madness ensued.

Bethany: oh I love that movie!

Jenna/Katie/Melissa: Me too!!

Christian: isn't…the phantom…Erik?

Jenna: yea…

Christian: if you love it so much why would you deliberately try to make him angry?

Bethany: cuz it's fun.

Erik: I hate you.

Bethany: thanks.

Christian: -confused- how is that a good thing?

Bethany: don't ask…just don't ask.

Christian: ok then.

Jenna: We're not gonna watch it but I also have the movie that –points to Christian and Satine- you two are in…along with the Duke…sadly.

Bethany/Katie/Melissa: We love that movie too!

Bethany: -mumbles- but Pirates is better.

Jenna: JACK SPARROW!!! Where?!

Katie: -pats Jenna on the shoulder- he went home Jenna…he's back with his piratey people. It's ok.

Jenna: I miss him.

Katie: I know. –Nods- I know

Melissa: Shall we get back to the movie now?

Everyone: ok.

-they all walk inside and go in the den-

Jenna: this room is getting really crowded….you just watch the movie…I'll go see if Raoul and The Duke are out of the tree yet. –Leaves-

Katie: I'll go with her….she can't handle those two mindless idiots on her own. –Leaves to help Jenna-

-Everyone is sitting there quietly…until….-

-The Duke and Raoul burst through the front door with mud on their faces and Jenna and Katie thrown over their shoulders tied up with duct tape over their mouths.-

Melissa: Silence is golden….but duct tape is silver.

Bethany: true, true, true, true. Took the words right out of my mouth.

Erik: -staring at them-…Jenna and Katie are tied up being carried by two mudfaced psychos and all you can think about is duct tape?!

Bethany: Yep.

Erik: some friends you are!

Melissa: yep…-takes Jenna and Katie from Raoul and The Duke and unties them.-

Bethany: -rips the duct tape off their mouth-

Katie and Jenna: ow!

Bethany: Sorry…had to be done…you want me to hit them with something?

Jenna: -hands a textbook to Bethany- have fun

Bethany: -grins and chases after Raoul and The Duke-

Mike: Is that her pre-calc text book? Man…that thing hurts!

Jenna: oh I'm sure you would know all about that Mike.

Christine: Violent one, ain't she?

Mike: You have NO idea.

Jenna: But oddly enough….she only hits men….mainly Michael.

Mike: what's that's supposed to mean?

Katie: well…he's not girly enough to be a girl…but not manly enough to be a man….he's in between…he's an "it"

Mike: thanks.

Katie: No problem.

Christian: this century really confuses me.

Erik: Welcome to my world, my friend. I've been here who knows how long and I still haven't gotten used to these people.

Jenna: Did he just use the words "My" and "Friend" in once sentence?

Melissa: I think he did…

Bethany: -stops running- what?

Erik: I can have a friend if I want to! Christian here is from around my time period and he seems like a very interesting person.

Christian: oh well…thank you! You seem very intriguing as well.

Melissa: I think I need to sit down…Erik is scaring me. He's actually being friendly with someone….other than Christine.

Jenna: maybe it has something to do with the fact that Christine and Christian are similar sounding names.

Erik: The name has nothing to do with it! I wouldn't give a damn if his name was Bob! Christian is a writer as am I…of opera's anyway…

Satine: Well Christian did write a musical once.

Christian: once…and it got twisted horribly by the Duke….and our personal experiences.

Erik: Oh well, what was it about?

Christian: I…don't feel like explaining it right now.

Satine: but it was very good….and I was lucky enough to star as the lead.

Christine: As I did with Erik's Opera, Don Juan Triumphant.

Erik: -nods- Well, can you at least tell me the name of the show?

Christian: Spectacular, Spectacular.

Jenna: So exciting, the audience will stomp and cheer!  
So delighting, it will run for 50 years!  
So exciting, the audience will stomp and cheer!  
So delighting, it will run for 50 years!

Katie: Spectacular, spectacular  
No words in the vernacular  
Can describe this great event  
You'll be dumb with wonderment

Bethany: That's a good song….but I'm not singing it.

Erik: Is that a song from your play?

Christian: No…that was the song…we used to…persuade The Duke to finance the play.

Bethany: Hmm…I just realized Christian and Erik are very similar…except Christian's not a crazed, stalker, mask wearing murderer.

Erik: -glares at Bethany- That was uncalled for! I am not crazed, nor stalker nor…ok…I am the last bit but…HOW DARE YOU!

Bethany: Because I can –starts laughing at his outburst-

Raoul and The Duke: Hey guys what's up….-pauses. Sees Erik looking royally pissed- Oh crap, what she do now?

Jenna: insulted him…again…then laughed at him…again. So I would get out of here while you still can.

Raoul: ok! –Starts to run but The Duke grabs his arm-

The Duke: No! I want to see what he's going to do!

Raoul: Well that's good for you but I WANT TO LIVE!!!

Katie: He's being a baby…let him go!

The Duke: Fine. –lets go of Raoul-

Raoul: -goes to whimper in the corner-

Everyone: -waiting to see what Erik will do-

Bethany: -stands there staring at Erik waiting for him to move…not seeming to be bothered by the murderous glare Erik is giving her.-

Erik: I will not stand for this! You have gone too far! –Starts to walk toward Bethany-

Bethany: Bring it on maskboy!

Jenna: wooow

Katie: I think she's lost it.

Mike: does she have a death wish?

Melissa: Apparently.

Christian: this will not end well.

Satine: I agree.

Christine: Erik! Don't!

The Duke: cool!

Raoul: -still whimpering in the corner- Don't kill her…please…-cries-

Erik: -growls and approaches Bethany-

-Suddenly everyone is stopped by a blinding light coming from the television. Erik turns around to look at it.-

Erik: What the hell?

Melissa: That's different from the swirling lights we usually see…

Bethany: oh crap…

Jenna: what?

-Erik is suddenly sucked into the TV and the blinding light disappears quickly.-

Katie: Where did he go?

Melissa: I don't know….

-somewhere else-

-the bright light appears and Erik goes flying out into murky water-

Erik: -stands up and looks around- Yes! I'm home! Finally, Free of those pests!! –runs up to the shore smiling happily-

-5 minutes later-

-Erik is at his Organ catching up on playing his music when he hears splashing behind him. He stops and turns around slowly to see Jenna, Katie, Melissa, Mike, Christine, Satine, Christian, Raoul, The Duke and Bethany.-

Erik: Oh…hell no.

_**A/N: Guess what guys….That was the end of Back To The Past. Wow…I can't believe it. But obviously…there is going to be a sequel! I'm not that evil to leave a cliffhanger like that for an end of a story. So…Please Review and please keep an eye out for the next installment! I haven't thought of a title yet…but…I will!! I hope…If you have any suggestions, I will gladly take them…Either in the review or you can PM me. **_

_**I enjoyed writing this story and I hope you enjoyed reading it. This, honestly, was more of a hit than I thought it would be and I am so thankful for all my faithful reviewers and readers…and all my friends in school who keep me going and for the last two chapters…giving me ideas…..**_

_**Tune in next time!! **_


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